


The Corrupted Angel

by The Girl With Metal Wings (HeatherT_13)



Category: Supernatural
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-20
Updated: 2019-08-07
Packaged: 2020-05-15 05:47:38
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 19
Words: 47,625
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19289395
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HeatherT_13/pseuds/The%20Girl%20With%20Metal%20Wings
Summary: A 21-year-old girl by the name of Heather accidentally finds herself thrown into the midst of none other than Purgatory. A place between Heaven and Hell but closer to Hell than to Heaven. When she gets there, she hears of a being that is feared throughout Purgatory. He is called "The Corrupted One" and is rumored to reign over Purgatory itself though no one knows for sure. Unfortunately, she draws a lot of unwanted attention to herself because of two significant things:1. She is a living Human who is in Purgatory, a place strictly for dead monsters.2. She has these giant metal wings, and she doesn't understand how she got them in the first place.Will she survive the wild place, or will she die and be stuck here like all the others? Will she meet new friends along the way, and who is this mysterious "Corrupted One" everyone keeps mentioning?





	1. Welcome To Purgatory

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Demon Castiel](https://archiveofourown.org/external_works/491827) by DanglingThpider. 



> So I have never posted anything on this site before, I am currently still writing this story as well so please be patient with me. This story is going to be a little different than other ones because of how it plays out, based loosely around after Dean and Castiel get out of Purgatory but Benny is back in again. There are mentions of the Angel Tablet, but still, I'm slightly taking that timeline and molding it into something of my mind.  
> Fair warning there will be smut in some later chapters, but I will mark those with warnings at the beginning in the Notes section. Feedback is always welcome, and if I hit a writer's block, then I will more than likely ask you all about what should happen in the story!

I awoke in a strange place that I didn’t recognize, it looked like a giant forest that you would see on Earth, but something was off about it. The lighting was all wrong, like light from the sun was shining through a grey colored filter; it was like looking at something in some dream. I suddenly started asking myself how I got here and quickly began to realize that I had no idea. “Where the hell am I?” I slowly stood up and stretched the muscles of my back by rolling my shoulders. I allowed my giant metal wings, that had been gifted to me by an unknown being, to stretch out to their full span. They felt better, and I gave them a little flap kicking up fallen leaves around me into the air. I heard the sound of rushing water and decided to make my way in that direction. Maybe it could lead me out of here?  
I began walking through the woods alone, I was on edge, and my muscles in my back and shoulders were tense like a wound spring. I started following the river upstream for a while until I noticed something that was slightly hidden from view. It looked like an entrance to a cave, and my curiosity spiked a little. I felt my wings twitch as a heard a rustle in the woods behind me. “I wouldn’t go in there, girl.” I spun on my heel and flared my wings out in fright “Oh shiny wings you’ve got there, but you smell human, strange, what is a human doing here in Purgatory?” I felt my head spin; Purgatory, how was I in Purgatory? “Who are you? How did I get here, and why shouldn’t I go into that cave?”  
The person grinned at me, “Who I am is not important, and I don’t know how you got here. Don’t you know why not to go into that cave? There is a monster in there way more frightening than anything you’re going to see here normally. The Corrupted One lives in there, legends say he reigns over this place; now I’m not too sure about that…” The man stepped closer to me with the grace of a predator, and I froze. “But what I do know is that you aren’t leaving here alive, girl.” I watched as several pointed fangs sipped over both his upper and lower teeth. He snarled and lunged at me, aiming for my throat, and I screamed. I moved my wings in front of me like a shield as I felt a body crash into them.  
I heard an animalistic growl from behind me, followed by the body being lifted from my wings. The sound of tearing flesh was heard before the sound of something hitting the ground. “You alright there, darlin’?” There was another voice this one sounding full of concern and worry. I was too scared to move, and I tightened my wings around myself when I heard footsteps move around me. “Hey now, don’t be afraid of me. I ain’t gonna hurt you.”  
I slowly opened my wings to look through them “Well now ain’t you a pretty sight.” The man reached his hand down to me, offering to help me up. I cautiously took it and allowed myself to be pulled into a standing position. I snapped my wings out when I was comfortably standing, which caused the man that helped me jump a little. “Damn.” My wings twitched inward a little at his reaction to them, “I’m sorry, I’m still not used to them myself yet.” He looked at me a little funny, “I can imagine, now why don’t you tell me what a pretty little thing like yourself is doin’ in a rotten place like this one?”  
I slowly folded my wings against my back before answering him, “I don’t know, I just woke up here, I’m not dead, am I?” He chuckled and shook his head “Nah, I seriously doubt that you’re human, you don’t come to Purgatory when you die, that’s strictly for us monsters. The name is Benjamin Lafitte, but you can call me Benny if you’d like.” I looked around nervously “What kind of monsters exactly? That thing told me that there were monsters here, but that there was one that lives in that cave over there that is way worse than anything else here.”  
Benny shrugged his shoulders “You know, monsters, vampires, werewolves, stuff like that; and yeah I’ve heard of him, The Corrupted One, everyone in Purgatory knows about him, never seen him before though. What’s your name, darlin’? Unless you want me to keep callin’ you darlin’ instead.” I had to admit it, I liked it, but I wasn’t about to let this Benny know that. “Heather, my name is Heather, and it’s nice to meet you, Benny. Not to be rude, but, why did you help me anyway?” Benny shrugged his shoulders “Not every day a man gets to save a damsel in distress if you know what I mean.”  
I couldn’t help but laugh a little at that one “Haven’t heard that line in a long time. Tell me something, Benny, what kind of monster are you? Not to be rude or anything, just figured I’d ask.” Benny lifted his hands, “No harm in askin’, just so long as you ain’t insultin’ right?” I suddenly picked up on his accent, it sounded a lot like what people would call a “Cajun” accent, and I had to say, I liked it more than I probably should have. “I’m the same kind of monster that I just saved you from; I’m a Vampire.” He opened his mouth and allowed his fangs to slide into place which sent a shiver down my spine. “Well I can say one thing about all this, the movies got the fangs wrong, though I think I prefer the movies version, no offense.” He laughed at me as his fangs retracted “No offense taken, darlin’, now if you want, you can follow me, and I can take you somewhere safe if you want to trust a vampire that is.”  
I had slowly warmed up to him, so I nodded my head “Yeah sure, I mean, it’s not like I have anywhere to go from here, I was just following the river upstream when I stumbled across the cave.” He nodded his head and went to hand me something “Here, you’re gonna need this around here.” He gave me what looked like a tactical style Tomahawk, the blade was sharp, but the spike on the back of the axehead was nasty. “Blade is for hackin’ off limbs or to make some heads roll, the spike is for stabbin’ into things, or monsters. You can throw it, and if you do, throw it spike first, got me?” I nodded and strapped the ax to my belt. “Yeah, thanks, Benny, I would ask about you, but I think you’re covered.” He laughed at that one “Yeah, I guess I am, now cmon before another one of those vamps comes out to play.”


	2. The Cabin In The Woods

“It ain’t much, but it’s home for me, sorry about the small space darlin’.” We came up to a small cabin, and it looked old, ancient. “How long have you been here, Benny?” He opened the door, and I stepped inside the small house and looked around. There wasn’t much as far as furniture, but of course, I wasn’t expecting there to be much in a place like this. “Got no idea, been here for a long time though, I can tell you that much, gotta be at least fifty years.” I spun around as he shut and bolted the door “Fifty years?!” He grunted, “Yeah, like I said, been here a long time. Been dead a long time, so long that when I came back to Earth, albeit a very short time, I didn’t know what anything was. Everything had changed, the cars, televisions, everything, it was quite a sight.”

I interrupted him “Wait wait, you mean you’ve left this place before, and then decided to come back here? Why, why come back, why not stay?” He shrugged his shoulders “I didn’t belong there, you know? I didn’t fit in anywhere. I tried for a while, hell I even worked in a diner for a while, that was fun. But I realized I didn’t belong there, that in a twisted kinda way, I was more at home in this place.” I could empathize with Benny on that “Yeah I guess I can understand that I mean I’m kinda a freak too, with these wings and all. Can’t go anywhere without being gawked at.” I stretched them out slowly so as not to scare him again “They’re real pretty though, where did you get em anyway?” I shrugged my shoulders “I don’t remember, all I know was one day I didn’t have them and the next I did. My parents freaked out of course, and took me to have an X-Ray done, turns out my spine has been replaced with a metal one. How all this happened, and I don’t remember is beyond me.”

Benny walked around and took in my wings, “Could be the work of Angels, sounds like em anyway.” I looked over my shoulders “Angels? You mean like actual Angels, like biblical angels?” He reached out to touch one “Mind if I get a better look at em there, darlin’?” I shook my head “No, I don’t mind, not like they are fragile or anything.” He gently grabbed hold of my left wing and lifted it, feeling of the feathers “Damn, these are sharp on the edges, might not need that ax I gave you after all.” I looked at him confused and pulled my right wing close to my hand and felt of the tips of them. They were, in fact, razor sharp, so sharp I ended up nicking myself on one of them. “You know it’s a bad idea to bleed around vampires, right?”

I quickly spun around and reflexively wrapped my wings around myself defensively “Relax darlin’, I already told you I wasn’t gonna hurt you, didn’t I?” I looked at him dumbfounded, “But you just said…” He looked hurt, “Aw cmon now; I have more self-control than that.” I unwrapped my wings “A little nick ain’t enough to get my attention, darlin’ I’m too old for a small amount like that to affect me. Just try not to slice your wrist or anything like that, alright?” He walked into what I assumed was a kitchen, “You hungry, I’ve got some deer in here if you want any.” I followed him into the kitchen and saw a deer hanging upside down in the middle of the room. “I’ve never done this before but, aren’t you supposed to drain the deer outside and not, you know, in the kitchen?” He looked over his shoulder at me “You haven’t been here long have you? If I did this outside, I’d attract a hell of a lot of attention, an attention that I don’t want. That and I don’t like fightin’ over my food if I can help it.”

“Wait you feed on animals; I thought you being a vampire and all that you’d feed off of people.” He chuckled, “Well normally, I would feed off of humans, ‘specially a pretty girl like yourself, but it’s not often that humans end up in Purgatory.” He lit a fire in a fireplace and placed a pot over it “That, and I’m a gentleman, but don’t be mistaken, I wasn’t always this cute and cuddly. I was a mean son of a bitch back in the day, second in command of my nest, but that was a long time ago.” He cleaned the deer as he spoke before throwing some of the meat into the pot. “What turned you all cute and cuddly, if you don’t mind me asking?” He sighed and sat down in front of the fire “I met a woman and fell in love. Now I’m only guessin’ that you could imagine how that went right? Vampire and a human that don’t normally work out, but Andrea was somethin’ special.”

“Did she know what you were I mean?” I came and sat down beside of Benny and allowed my wings to relax behind me. “Yeah she knew, she wasn’t exactly fond of my habits, cause like I said I wasn’t always this cute and cuddly. But she put up with it until she gave me an ultimatum. Either I got my shit straight and leave my nest that I was with, or she was leaving me and not coming back.” He stirred what was in the pot for a moment, which allowed me to soak all of the information he was giving me into my brain. “So what did you do, Benny?” He sighed and looked at me, “I left, or rather I tried to leave, The Old Man didn’t like that, called me a traitor, and he killed me over it.” My wings gave a slight flap of annoyance “He sounds like an asshole if you ask me. Someone oughta kill him too, you know, make things even?”   
  
“Trust me darlin’ already did that, when I got back on Earth I killed him, I gotta say I did have some help though. Couldn’t have done it without him actually, he like a brother to me for a while, before I came back here. Dean Winchester, mean son of a bitch, but loyal to those he cares for to the point of it being almost scary. He had an Angel that he ran with, Castiel I think his name was, he was something, really fun to mess with though, he’d get his feathers all ruffled up with me a bunch, but we saved each other too.” I looked at him with a confused expression “An Angel helped a Vampire?” Benny stood up and took the pot off of the fire and hung it up to let it cool off for a while. “Things don’t run as smooth as what you think it does in the world of the supernatural darlin’. Hell, I’ve seen that Angel work with a demon or two, heard he had a crush on one too. So helping out a vampire doesn’t sound so ridiculous when you know all that, now does it?”

I was feeling my head spin, Angels working with Demons, it didn’t make sense, “Is he fallen, Castiel, is he a Fallen Angel?” Benny looked at me and laughed “He’s a Seraph, not quite sure what those are, but he sure as hell ain’t fallen, least not that I know of. He does go against the grain of most Angels though; Dean calls it Team Free Will, it is him, his brother Sam, and Castiel. Sam don’t like me too much either, he thinks I replaced him or somethin’ but considering I was the one who helped Dean when he wound up in this place, along with that Angel, and he didn’t try to get him out, well, I guess you could say that I kinda did replace him for a while, couldn’t you?” I was in utter shock at the information I was being told. “Too much for you there darlin’?” I nodded my head, “Yeah, just a little bit, Benny, just a little bit.” He seemed amused, “Just how much do you know about the supernatural, Heather?” He grabbed the pot from where it was hanging and sat it down on the floor in front of me. “Only what I’ve read in the Bible and seen on T.V. and what’s on T.V. is garbage when it comes to Vampires at least. And if what you’re telling me is true about this Angel then...I don’t know what to believe.”

“Well, you can believe what I’m tellin’ you cause it’s true.” I carefully grabbed hold of the now cooled down pot and looked inside “Hope you don’t mind stew, it’s the only thing I can make out here.” I sniffed of the stew and closed my eyes “If it tastes as good as it smells, then I assure you I’m not going to mind.” I grabbed hold of the spoon that he used to stir the stew with and carefully blew on it to cool it down before taking a bite, it tasted terrific “Is that a hint of Cajun spice in there?” Benny grinned at me, “Sure is darlin’, you like it?” I hummed and nodded my head, “I love it; it’s fantastic, Benny.” Benny smiled at me before standing up and holding his hand out for me to take. “Cmon, I’ll show you where you can sleep. I don’t sleep much anymore, so don’t worry about me. Plus someone needs to keep an eye out for monsters.”

He took me into a small room that was just off from the main hall “Again, it ain’t much, but it’s all I’ve got.” I turned to him “You sure about this Benny? I can keep watch while you sleep for a while if you want.” He shook his head “Nah, the last thing I need to happen is for somethin’ to come in on us and me not be ready for it. My senses are better when I’m awake than when I’m asleep. Plus I’m dead, so I don’t even really need sleep, but you aren’t, and you’re human, which means you do need sleep.” I raised my hand in surrender, “Alright alright, I’ll go to sleep, jeez.” Benny chuckled as I entered and looked around the room.

It was simple; it had a single window and a small bed with a table beside it. I noticed two pictures sitting on the table in two separate frames and decided to pick them up. “Hey, Benny, who are these two?” I turned the photos around for him to see, and he came over and gently took them both from me and smiled.

The picture he handed back to me first was of a man in a brown colored denim jacket who looked rather arrogant as if knew just how good he looked. “This is Dean, the one I told you about earlier.” I examined it more and chuckled at his expression “Let me guess, really arrogant, knows he looks good? Probably does well with the women, right?” Benny laughed “Oh yeah, he can kick some major ass though let me tell you. Matter of fact here…” Benny opened a closet that was in the room and pulled out a nasty looking blade that had been made from obsidian, attached to what looked like a human bone. “This is what Dean used when he was here, lotta monsters killed with this thing, and to be honest I think he enjoyed it to a point.”

I shivered a little as I looked at the blade and turned it over in my hands. The blade looked like a crudely made machete, but it had a slight curve to it. “Where did he even get something like this?” Benny shrugged and gently took it from my hands “No clue, I think he stole it from a monster that he killed. I like mine better though, I’ll let you look at mine too, and you tell me what you think?” He reached back into the closet and pulled out another weapon, this one also used a bone as the handle, but the blades looked like an ancient signpost that held several signs, it would have been funny if the “signs” weren’t made of obsidian blades attached to a bone.

“So which one do you like better darlin’?” I turned it over a few times and looked up at Benny “Sorry Benny; I have to say I like Dean’s better, this one is pretty cool, though.” His shoulders sagged in only what could be described as a mock defeat “Well damn, guess I’ll have to tell Dean that next time I see him, won’t I?” I laughed and handed him his weapon back “Yeah I guess you will Benny. But you say that as if you know you’re gonna see him again?” Benny gave me a knowing look “Purgatory has an escape hatch darlin’, and if I’m gonna get back out, again, then I’m gonna have to have your help, just like I had to have Dean’s help.” I shrugged my shoulders “Alright, I’ll help you; it’s least I can do since you decided not to eat me, I guess.” He flinched, “Ouch that almost hurt me, but I guess you do owe me one, huh?” I nodded and pointed to the other picture in his hand. “So who is the one in this picture?”

He handed me the picture as he sat down on the bed and motioned for me to sit next to him. “This is Castiel, the Angel that Dean ran with, their best friends actually, it’s kinda funny if you ask me.” I smiled at the picture and couldn’t help but laugh “He looks like a confused and lost puppy. It’s adorable.” Benny chuckled at my description of Castiel. “Got a thing for the Angel, do you? I see it; he seems like your type. Can’t say I’m not a little disappointed though, thought I might at least have a chance with ya, after savin’ your life and all that.” I jerked my head up at him “What do you mean he seems like my type? Is it the wings Benny? It’s the wings isn’t it!” He put his hands up in mock surrender “Hey now, no need to cut my head off over it darlin’ was just an observation is all."

I rolled my eyes at him “Just an observation, sure it is. Oh and Benny, you have cooking and a nice accent going for you, but that’s just an observation so don’t go and bite me over it, okay?” He laughed and ruffled my short hair “I like you, you know how to take shit from people and give it back to them, I bet you and Dean would be excellent friends.” We both laughed for a while and continued talking about Dean and Castiel until it became dark, and everything became eerily quiet.

Benny slowly stood up and put a finger over his lips to shush me and motioned over to the closet. I instantly got up and moved to stand inside of the closet and shut the doors. I grabbed hold of the ax that was attached to my belt and turned it so that the spike was facing the door. If anything were to come in it would get a spike to the head, it wasn’t going to be pretty. Benny came over and knocked “Hey, hand me my weapon out of there will ya darlin’? I feel like this is gonna get ugly.” I quickly handed him his weapon but stopped him before he could reach the door “Benny… what do I do, I’m scared.” He gave me a sorrowful look “I know darlin’ listen, if I’m not back in here within two minutes, or if you hear me tell you to run, get out that window as quick as you can and head to that cave, understand?”

I looked at him like he was crazy “But Benny, The Corrupted One is in that cave, what if…” He came over to me and placed his hands on my shoulders while looking in my eyes. “Exactly, which is why no other monster goes into that cave, they are scared of it, trust me okay? Now hide in that closet, and if you have to run, don’t look back understand? I’ll be right behind you, I promise.” I swallowed and nodded my head quickly ducking into the closet and clutching my ax tight in my hand. Benny went out of the bedroom door, and I instantly heard what sounded like animalistic growls and snarls. My body froze from the sounds of fighting; my muscles were tense and ready to spring at any moment; all I needed was a reason to bolt. I heard a particularly nasty snarl before I heard Benny scream at me “Heather get out of here! Run!” I grabbed hold of the weapon that Dean used to carry around, put the pictures into my pockets, and ran. I broke the window by breaking it with my right wing and tumbling through it. My heart was racing as a tore through the woods towards the sound of running water and back towards the cave that Benny told me to hide in.


	3. Home Of The Corrupted One

I was running as fast as my momentum would allow, I saw the cave up ahead when I heard something crashing through the trees in my direction. I cursed and ran more quickly than I thought I could, it’s incredible what you’re body can accomplish when you’re being scared shitless. I made it to the mouth of the cave just in time to see what was chasing me stop following me. It was massive and something that I had never seen before. Its forelimbs were massive and looked like they could rip me to pieces like a piece of paper, it had a long cat-like tail, broad chest and shoulders with red glowing eyes set high on its colossal head. 

I watched it as I backed slowly into the cave, not paying attention to where I was stepping. The ground under my feet suddenly took a sharp decline, and I felt myself falling backward down a slope full of jagged rocks. I cried out in alarm when I suddenly went into a free-fall as another sharp drop was made. I was able to stabilize myself when the sharp drop turned into a gentle slope. I slowly stood up and brushed myself off and followed the path that leads down deeper into the cave.

The path came to a stop in a giant cavern within the cave, the room itself was massive. Stalactites were hanging from the ceiling of the cave, and the water below was so clean it was like looking into a mirror. There was a golden colored light coming from the roof of the cave that peeked between the stalactites, and it was beautiful. I slowly moved down to the water and put my hand into it, it was cold, but not frigid, probably because it was stagnant water and not running into any rivers. 

“Heather, you in there darlin’?!” I jumped to my feet and scrambled back up the small slope when I heard Benny shouting from outside. “Benny! I’m in here, watch your step when you come in!” I listened to my voice echo throughout the cave, and I flinched, if anything did live in here, it certainly knew I was in here now. I watched as Benny slid down and dropped in front of me before grabbing me and pulling me into a hug which I happily returned. “You okay, they didn’t touch you, did they?” I buried myself deeper into Benny’s chest and just shook my head. The adrenaline was wearing off, and the reality of what had just transpired was starting to soak in. Benny went to push me off of him gently but and only grabbed tighter which shocked him. 

“Heather, hey you okay, what’s wrong?” I felt myself begin to cry, and I cursed as I held it in. He got a more firm grip on my shoulders and gently but firmly pushed me back. “Heather, seriously, what’s the matter… you ain’t cryin’ on me now are ya?” I didn’t look at him as I felt a tear slide down my cheek. I just shook my head again, and he sighed and brought me back into his chest. “It’s alright. You can cry if you want to darlin’.” He slowly moved to have me sit down with him as he pulled me into his lap and cradled me like a child against him. “I’ve got you. It’s okay, nothin’s gonna hurt you here, you’re safe.”

My body started to shake, and I began to hyperventilate a little. I clutched tighter to Benny's shirt, balling the fabric up in my fists and I subconsciously wrapped him in my wings. He didn’t freak out, though. Instead, he held me tighter to him and continued to shush me gently. “Those… those creatures… Benny… what were they.” He sighed heavily “You saw one, didn’t you darlin’?” I nodded my head as I tried to calm my breathing “They are what Dean and I call Gorilla-Wolves, real nasty sons of bitches. One must have scared you pretty bad, huh?” I felt my body give one last strong shudder before I was able to calm my breathing.

“Yeah, I saw one before I came in here, it was chasing me, but it wouldn’t cross the river to get to me. It was horrible, and those eyes, I’ve never seen anything like it.” I slowly removed my wings from around Benny and gave him one final hug before standing up. “Thank you, Benny, for helping me through that. I haven’t had one like that in a while, I’m sorry.” He slowly stood up so as not to startle me further “I’m guessin’ you have anxiety, right?” I nodded, “Yeah, I have for years, I don’t normally freak out during the bad stuff; it normally hits me afterward.” Benny nodded “Well it’s better to have them afterward than durin’ the bad stuff. It sucks from what I hear, but it’s best to have them after and not durin’, know what I mean?” 

“Yeah, I know what you mean. Come here I want you to see this, this place, it’s beautiful.” I turned around and led him down the small path and into the large cavernous room. I sat down and removed my shoes and socks while rolling up my pants and slipped my feet into the water. It was soothing, and I let out a breath and allowed myself to calm down the rest of the way while listening to the water from the ceiling fall into the water below. “It’s so peaceful in here. I don’t understand why nothing comes in here.”

“Nothing comes in here, because they know that I’m in here.” I lifted my head quickly when a figure appeared on the other side of the room. “Well, now I ain’t believin’ this. You were out. Dean told me you got out, so why in the hell are you back in here?” The figure didn’t move from where he stood in shadow so I couldn’t see who was talking, but their voice was deep and rough, gravely even, and yet, slow and soothing. “Because I belong here now, that’s why.” Benny sighed and touched my shoulder “Stay here, I’m gonna go talk to him for a minute. Don’t be wanderin’ around, alright?” I stood up to argue only to jump backward and emit a cry of alarm. The figure had moved from across the room to suddenly being behind me, I could see by the reflection in the water.” 

Benny spun on his heel and pushed me behind him once he got a good look at who was standing behind me. “Castiel, what the hell happened to you?” I peeked around Benny’s shoulder and looked at Castiel. He did not look the same as he did in the picture that Benny had shown me. He didn’t look the same at all; even his attire had changed. “The Leviathans happened, they got a hold of me when I first opened that door, and they didn’t let go of me.”

Castiel turned his head to look at me, and I felt a chill run down my back. His right eye was a soulless black. It was like looking into an abyss, except the abyss was looking back. His left eye was as blue as an ocean, comforting and warm. The two drastic differences caught me off guard, and I hid behind Benny once again. I heard a sigh and realized it came from Castiel “That is why I couldn’t stay on Earth. I’m not accepted there anymore, Heaven and the Angels won’t take me, and Hell and the Demons won’t take me either. I’m an abomination in every sense of the word. Even my wings have changed, my Grace is failing me, and I have to battle with my thoughts consistently because of it. I’m dangerous not only to myself but to every other being natural and supernatural. That’s why I came back because I didn’t have a choice.” 

I felt my heart ache for him because I could understand what he meant; I could empathize with him. “Does Dean know that you’re back in here again, does he know what’s happened to you?” Castiel turned and looked at the water “No, Dean does not know that I am here, and it needs to stay that way. The less he knows about what’s happened to me, the better for both him and for Sam.” 

I pulled out the picture that Benny had taken of Castiel, and I felt my heart, break for him. He looked so innocent like he didn’t quite understand the true evils of the world — an adorable amount of confusion, yet full of life. But when I looked at him again, I saw the complete opposite. His eyes showed pain and understanding of what pure evil was, what it was to be alone. I carefully stepped out from behind Benny and moved to stand in between him and Castiel, who was still staring into the water. “Castiel…” I spoke in just above a whisper, and he flinched like he had been burned. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to upset you. If it makes you feel any better, I understand what you mean about not belonging anywhere.” 

I was still speaking in a whisper when he slowly turned to face me again. His left arm was holding onto his right shoulder to keep his leather jacket from falling off of it. It was only then that I noticed all the tattoos that were etched across his body. They looked like symbols of some kind, but I didn’t know what any of them meant so I didn’t bother to ask about them. He had several rings on both hands that looked to be made of silver. I also noticed what looked like burns on his left forearm, or rather scars of what used to be burned.

“What do you mean you understand? You’re a human, not an abomination.” I sighed and slowly stretched out my metal wings “That depends on how you define “abomination,” Castiel. I was a normal girl with a normal life, well as normal as it can get anyway. I lived at home with both my parents and younger brother. We took vacations every summer in the mountains. Then one day I woke up and I had these. My parents immediately took me to the hospital to have an X-Ray done, turns out my spine had been replaced with a metal one. I couldn’t go anywhere after that. I had to keep my wings hidden, which was a near impossibility. I spent most of my time in the woods. Now I’m here, and I don’t know why or how to get out, Benny says there is a way, but I don’t know where it is.”

Castiel looked awestruck and looked over to Benny for an explanation. “Don’t look at me Cas. I got no idea how she got here or who or what gave her those wings. I told her it sounded to me like angel work, but I ain’t exactly the brightest vampire in the nest if you catch my drift.” Castiel tensed when Benny called him “Cas” and I watched as his once blue iris turned black as he turned his body to face Benny strait on. “I told you  _ not  _ to call me that.” There was a growl to Castiel’s tone that wasn’t there before, and I cautiously stepped backward away from them both “You threatin’ me, Cas? Or did I ruffle your feathers again like I normally do?”

The air suddenly shifted as a growl ripped from Castiel’s throat in response, and I shivered. “Hey Benny, maybe you shouldn’t piss him off? I mean, if what he is saying is true, he’s not the same angel you know. He doesn’t look the same to me, so I’m pretty sure he isn’t the same so, please, cool it down a little?” I saw something shift under Castiel’s jacket, and I felt the blood drain from my face. I watched as the end of two wings slipped from under his leather jacket, and my heart stopped. The tips were sharp bone, as sharp as the spike on my ax and I freaked “Benny move!” Benny ducked out of the way just in time for one of Castiel’s wings to shoot out from underneath the jacket and aim for where his throat was not a second prior. Benny looked at me in shock as he stumbled backward from Castiel. “What am I dodgin’ darlin’? You seein’ stuff or what?” 

I was confused, “You’re kidding. There’s no way you didn’t see his wings.” Castiel whirled around to face me, his blue eye still black and I gulped. He tilted his head at me like he was confused “You saw them? How.” He took a step forward, and I reflexively took a step back only to back against one of the low hanging stalactites. He removed his jacket and spread his wings completely letting me get a good look at them. “You can see my wings?” I nodded as I stared at them, they looked like the wings of a  bat, but bones were resting on top of the membrane, the bones ran down into sharp spikes at the bottom of his wings. “Heather darlin’ you okay? You look like you’ve seen another Gorilla-Wolf.”

I nodded my head and slowly moved away from the stalactite and took a step towards Castiel. His wings flinched, and I immediately stopped moving, he looked tense and untrusting. “Hey Benny, can you do me a favor?” Benny went to take a step towards me, and Castiel’s wings snapped back to their full span which caused me to startle. “Don’t come towards me, but make your way outside, I think I need to talk to Castiel alone.” Benny looked at me like I was crazy “No way, I ain’t about to leave you in here with him. Not when he’s like this, I might have before, but now…” I saw Castiel’s left eye flicker to blue for a moment; he looked hurt. “Benny please, just give me five minutes, please.” Benny let out a small growl but looked down in defeat “Fine, but if I think for a second that somethin’ ain’t right…” 

I gave him a look, and he took it as his sign to leave. Once he was out of eyeshot of both Castiel and myself, I slowly moved to sit down in front of Castiel. I opened my wings and let them rest behind me on the ground. “You can sit down Castiel; I don’t bite I promise.” I watched him fold his wings against his back and slip his jacket back onto his shoulders before sitting down in front of me. I reached into the pocket of my jeans and pulled out the picture that Benny had taken of Castiel and handed it to him. He gently took it, and as he looked at himself in the image, his black iris turned back to its natural blue. “Where did you get this?” His voice was gentle and troubled, and he pinned me with his striking gaze. “I got it from Benny’s house, it was in his bedroom, along with this one.” I handed him the picture of Dean, and the pained look in his eye turned to one of sorrow. “What happened to you, Castiel? What happened to make you isolate yourself like this. What happened to…”  

“To turn me into an abomination?” He gently handed me back the pictures and took a deep breath. “What you are asking me to explain will take a while, Heather.” I put the pictures back into my pocket and looked at him “I have time and correct me if I’m wrong, but you seem like you need someone to talk to. Someone who doesn’t know your story, a fresh pair of ears, right?” He shifted awkwardly, and I caught a glimpse of the angel in the picture. “You still have that innocence in there, I can see it, though it is very little, it is still in there.” He nodded, “Yes, but it is quickly slipping away. My Grace is fading; eventually, I’ll become what I hate the most.” 

 


	4. The Angel Who Hurt's

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was inspired while listening to the song Hurt by Johnny Cash. This chapter can get emotional and I would recommend tissues!

Castiel looked away from me, and there was something in his eyes that I couldn’t quite read. “I’ll become a Demon. It’s one thing for an Angel to fall, for an Angel to become human even, but to become a Demon… that is something we fear more than falling.” That’s when I realized he was scared. He was afraid of becoming what he hates. “Castiel…” I reached out and gently touched him “Is that why you came back here?” He shook his head “No, I have my reasons for coming back here, but that isn’t one of them.” I looked at him and noticed he had something coming from his head, I could only assume it was blood from an injury, but blood doesn’t run black. “It’s a side effect when the Leviathans used me as their vessel it caused that. They are the reason that I changed, and it's all my fault.”

I used my ax and cut off a piece of my shirt and dipped it into the water that was beside of me getting it wet. “What do you mean it was your fault?” I spoke slowly and gently afraid that I would scare him away. “When I opened the door to Purgatory, I accidentally absorbed all the souls that resided there. Unfortunately, I also absorbed the Leviathans, the most ancient and dangerous of any creature ever created.” I moved to wipe away the blood on his head, but he caught my wrist before I could. He looked at the cloth in my hand and back to me, asking a silent question. “I was going to wipe the blood off, but if you don’t want me to then, it’s okay.”

He gently released my wrist and allowed me to clean where the blood was. “It felt amazing at first, the power that came with all those souls being inside me. I became like a god, and so I proclaimed myself as God. But what I wanted to happen wasn’t how it ended. I was more of a tyrant, a cruel leader than a father. I killed legions of Angels, killed several people, all because I was doing what I thought was right.” I looked at him with sympathy “What did Dean do, Benny said you two were best friends, what happened with him?”

Castiel flinched “We weren’t just friends, Sam and Dean, they were my family. But when I became what I did… they… they wanted to kill me. That's why I refuse to go back to Earth like this. I don’t want him to see me as an enemy. I don’t want them to see me as the monster that I have become.” I looked him in the eyes, “You aren’t a monster, Castiel.” He scoffed and stood up, turning his back to me, “I am a monster, the longer that the Leviathans were inside, the stronger they became until they took control over me. I couldn’t hold them after they surfaced though, and my vessel exploded, I exploded.” I gaped at him “Wait, so you mean you died?” 

He nodded, “Yes, I was resurrected by God without my memories in Colorado. Dean found me along with this Demon; she was nice, which confused me. I didn’t understand how a Demon could be nice. I was able to regain my memories, and everything went downhill from there. When I had realized what I had done, how many people I had killed...how many Angels…” His voice started to break, and I slowly stood up and placed a hand on his shoulder. “It’s alright Castiel, that wasn’t you, not really, that wasn’t your fault. Power gets to people sometimes, it’s normal, don’t beat yourself up over it.”

He spun around on me “It was my fault, I let them get the best of me.” I held my ground “You made a mistake Castiel, everyone makes mistakes.” He angrily shook his head, “Not Angels. Angels don’t make mistakes.” The blue of his eye was swallowed by darkness once again as a growl rose from his chest, and my heart stopped. “I let them slip through, I lost control, I killed those people, I did it all!” A bright light filled the room, and I saw shadows of his wings appear on the cave walls, but the ones in shadow were different from the ones on his back. They were angelic wings that looked severely damaged, most of the feathers had fallen out, leaving only a few hanging onto the main structure of the wings by a thread.

“I turned on everyone, I turned on my Angelic brothers and sisters, I turned on Sam and Dean, I turned on Humanity, and for what?! Because I refused to put the souls back where they belonged, I should have put them back when Dean told me to put them back, but I was selfish and power hungry! Because I couldn’t control my emotions and want to be appreciated!” His words shattered my heart as he spoke them, but it was nothing compared to what he said next “I was broken, and you know what I got told? I was told that no one cared that I was broken and to clean up my mess. I gave so much for them. I rebelled for them. I gave up everything for them! I was there to give them comfort. I came every time they called, I died for them, and Dean stood there and said that he didn’t care…”

The light and shadows faded and Castiel collapsed on the cave floor. His body shook and trembled, and I sat down and gathered him into my arms. “They don’t care; he doesn’t care, no one cares.” I felt tears come to my eyes as I held him tightly against me.  I felt him clutch to my shirt as he continued to tremble in my arms, and I wrapped my wings around him to try and calm him down. “Shh, Cas, it’s okay, I’m right here, everything is going to be okay. I care okay. I care that you’re broken. I care.” He slowly stopped shaking but didn’t try to leave my embrace “Why, why would you care when my only family doesn’t?” I ran my fingers through his hair, “Because I believe in giving people second chances, Castiel. I believe in forgiveness, and you deserve forgiveness and a second chance. Just because Dean said that to you doesn’t make it true, okay?”

 He took a shaky breath and sighed, “I’m sorry, I get like that sometimes, I can’t control it anymore.” I kept running my fingers through his hair and started humming a song to him. “Hey Cas, you remind me of a story I heard in school once. Have you ever heard of  the man called Icarus?” He rolled over onto his back and looked up at me confused, his head resting in my lap. “Why would a human male be called that? It’s such a strange name.” I laughed lightly at what he said “Yeah well, his story is even stranger, the story originates Greek Mythology, that’s where some of the best stories come from I think. Anyway, his father Daedalus made Icarus and himself a pair of wings that were made of wax to escape the island of Crete, which is where Daedalus was exiled to when he murdered his apprentice, Talus, in a fit of rage and jealousy. Now Crete was known to house the creature known as the Minotaur. They were large creatures that had the body of a man and the head of a bull. After Daedalus wife, Naucrate gave birth to Icarus, the king of the Isle of Crete commanded Daedalus to build a space that could house the Minotaur. Instead, Daedalus built a labyrinth so complex that no being that entered into it could escape it.”

Castiel gazed up at me in wonder like a little child who was learning something new. “Now the people of the Isle of Crete didn’t know that the Minotaur existed, and so to keep the creature and the structure a secret from the citizens of Crete, the king had Daedalus and his family arrested and locked away. To escape the Island, he could not go by land or sea, the only option he had was to fly, and so Daedalus began to collect the fallen feathers of birds who would visit the island. It took many years, but when the time came to escape, he had successfully built two pairs of wings from the feathers of the birds that had been stuck together using wax. One pair was for himself, and the other pair was for his son, Icarus.” I looked down to see that Castiel had closed his eyes, he looked peaceful, so I continued my story.

“When the time came for Daedalus and Icarus to escape, Daedalus told his son Icarus to not fly too close to the sun, for the sun’s heat would melt the wax that held the wings together. When the two took to the sky, Icarus was so enchanted by the power of flight that he went against what his father told him and flew towards the sun. Just like his father had warned, the heat from the sun warmed and melted the wax that held the wings together, and Icarus fell into the sea and drowned.”

“This sounds like a horrible story, Heather. What does it have to do with me?” I looked down to see Castiel once again staring back up at me. “You remind me of Icarus because you did not heed the warning of your family, Cas. Your heart and wanting to do good was your wings. The sun was the power of the souls that you had, and the sea is the result of what happened when you lost control. But you haven’t drowned yet, right now you’re treading water because you’re strong and Benny and I are offering you a boat to take you back to shore.” 

Tears filled his eyes as he stared at me “You would do that, for me?” I nodded and continued to hum the song that I had started earlier “Thank you, that means so much to me, thank you.” I stopped humming and wiped his tears away “Don’t cry Castiel, there is no reason to cry anymore, not right now.” He sat up and hugged me, and I wrapped my arms around his neck. “That tune you were humming, what is it from?” I blushed and lent back and out of his embrace. “It was a song that came to mind while you were telling me your story.” He tilted his head, “A song? Will you sing it for me?” I choked on air “I mean, I don’t have the voice for it, and it’s a rather sad song I don’t think you want to hear it right now…” 

He gave me a look like the one in the picture except more pleading “Please, Heather, it may make me feel better?” I sighed and nodded while motioning for him to lay back down. “Just promise not to judge me for it okay?” He nodded and closed his eyes. I took a deep breath and began to sing to him.

[Hurt by Johnny Cash](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gSS2IgnnBo8)

_I hurt myself today_

_To see if I still feel_

_I focus on the pain_

_The only thing that’s real_

 

_The needle tears a hole_

_The old familiar sting_

_Try to kill it all away_

_But I remember everything_

 

_What have I become_

_My sweetest friend_

_Everyone I know_

_Goes away in the end_

 

_And you could have it all_

_My empire of dirt_

_I will let you down_

_I will make you hurt_

 

_I wear this crown of thorns_

_Upon my liar's chair_

_Full of broken thoughts_

_I cannot repair_

 

_Beneath the stains of time_

_The feelings disappear_

_You are someone else_

_I am still right here_

_What have I become_

_My sweetest friend_

_Everyone I know_

_Goes away in the end_

_And you could have it all_

_My empire of dirt_

_I will let you down_

_I will make you hurt_

_If I could start again_

_A million miles away_

_I will keep myself_

_I would find a way_

I heard footsteps come down the slope and watched as Benny came in and stop dead at the sight of Castiel sleeping on my lap. “The hell did you do to get that to happen darlin’?” I gently ran my fingers through Castiel’s hair again. I couldn’t help it; it was just so soft and thick. “I listened to his story, Benny, and I can say that Dean needs a good swift kick in the ass.” Benny chuckled and came and sat next to me, “I’ll tell him you said that too then.” I looked at him “We are getting him out of here Benny. He needs to get out of here before he kills himself.” 

“Damn, is he that bad off?” I nodded, “Yeah, he is, and Dean didn’t help either if anything he made it worse.” Benny grunted, “Yeah, he’s good at doin’ that, and I gotta tell you, I ain’t never seen that angel sleep, I don’t even think Dean has.” I looked down and noticed he had a cut across his stomach that had black blood around it. “Benny grab that piece of cloth and rinse it out and hand it to me please.” My voice was a whisper again so that I wouldn’t wake Castiel.

Benny handed me the piece of cloth, and I gently wrung it out before placing it on the wound. “Say that wasn’t you singin’ in here a while ago was it?” I froze and looked at Benny, “You heard that?” He laughed, “I heard the whole thing darlin’, and I gotta say you picked one hell of a song. Probably the most depressing thing I’ve ever heard.” I rolled my eyes, “Yeah, well, Johnny Cash wasn’t exactly known for his happy songs.” Benny shrugged “I wouldn’t know really, heard of him though. Hey, I wanted to ask you somethin’, earlier you told me to move out of the way, why?”

I felt my back stiffen “When you made Cas angry, I saw something move under his jacket. I saw his wings Benny, and they aren’t angelic wings, not anymore at least.” He looked at me funny, “Okay, so, what about them?” I sighed, “He was going to try and kill you, Benny.” He looked shocked “You’re kiddin’ me?” I shook my head and jerked when I heard a deep growl. I looked down at Castiel who was glaring at Benny, both his blue iris once again black. “Benny…” Benny slowly started to stand up, “Way ahead of you, darlin’.” Right, when Benny got to his feet, Castiel lunged forward toward him.

I wrapped my arms and wings around Castiel, locking him in place “Cas, Cas hey! Calm down. It’s okay!” His body temperature suddenly felt like it skyrocketed, and he started shaking. “Heather, what the hell is goin’ on with him?” I shook my head and kept a tight hold on him “I don’t know, he told me something about having fits that he couldn’t control. Something about having his mind corrupted by the Leviathans when they possessed him.” He suddenly went very still and fell against me, his head resting on my shoulder. I felt his hand wrap around my arm gently, and I relaxed a little and let my wings slowly fall away from him. “Hm, I can see why he likes you, you’re pretty, _and_ you smell nice.”

“Whoa what the hell!” I shoved Castiel off of me before jumping up and away from him. “Well, now _that_ was rude, sweetheart.” I felt my heart drop; this was not Castiel. He stood up and brushed himself off “Seriously though, do you push everyone that compliments you on the ground?” I looked at him both scared and confused. His voice had suddenly lost the deep gravelly tone and was replaced with a higher pitched, yet still slightly rough version. “Cas, buddy, listen if this is some joke it ain’t funny.” Castiel spun to face Benny “Okay I told you already not to call me that. Cas isn’t here right now. I am, so _stop calling me that ."_

Castiel flicked his wrist and Benny went flying across the cave into the opposite wall. “Now that he’s out of the way, we finally get to talk, hello Heather.” He turned around to face me again, and I immediately backed up. “Oh come on now, don’t be afraid of me,  I won’t hurt you.” There was a mischievous glint in his eye that I didn’t like “Who are you, and what have you done to Cas?” He sighed dramatically “So concerned for someone you’ve just met. If I didn’t know any better, and I’m pretty sure that I do, I’d say that you _like_ him, don’t you?” I blinked, and he was suddenly right in front of me, and I screamed. “Oh, you _are_ going to be fun to play with, how _exciting_.” He backed me against a wall and pinned me in with both his arms.


	5. His Name Was Icarus

This childlike glee that was coming from him was slightly unnerving “Now to answer the question as to who I am, I think you already know that you did name me after all.” I looked at him, confused, “What are you talking about, I didn’t  _ name _ you.” He made a sound almost like a purr “Hm, I’m not too sure about that, I mean I think  _ Icarus  _ has a nice ring to it, don’t you think, sweetheart? I heard that name ringing in your head the second you looked at me. Matter of fact, I think it’s ringing in there right now, isn’t it?” I looked away, unable to meet his eyes while at the same time another purr came from him. “Hey you know, if it makes you feel any better, I do plan on kicking that Winchester’s ass.” I glanced up at him “So that  _ does  _ make you feel better, want to tell me why?”

“I don’t know  _ Icarus _ why don’t you go digging through my head and find the answer?” He looked shocked then he grinned at me “Oh feisty, I like it, and you know I might do that. But then again…” He leaned down to whisper in my ear, “I think I’d much rather hear you scream for another reason.” My breath caught in my throat, and he must have caught on because the look he gave me was pure heat. “Well, now that was an interesting reaction. You are twisted, aren’t you, sweetheart.” I shoved him back and snapped my wings open to their full span “Okay  _ Icarus  _ why don’t you kindly fuck off and give me Cas back. At least he knows how to be a gentleman, and you could take some lessons.”

The laugh he let out was dark, and it sent a shiver down my spine “Feisty and has a dirty mouth, I’m starting to like you even more now. You aren’t that special with those wings sweetheart, just so you're aware.” He shed his jacket and snapped his wings open in the same manner that I had. “So, you wanna know why you can see these wings and Benny can’t?” I crossed my arms and glared at him “Lemme guess, I can see them because you want me to see them, and Benny can’t see them because you don’t want him to see them.” He laughed at me again “Good guess, excellent guess, but no. You see these aren’t Castiel’s wings. These are mine, the ones you saw in shadow; those are Castiel’s though the situation is the same. The reason you can see them and no one else can is simple. I think in the movies, you humans call them… oh, what was that term again? Oh yes! Soul-mates, that’s it, soul-mates has a nice little ring to it, don’t you think.” 

I started to feel sick “Okay look, with Cas sure, but with you? Hell no!” I saw Benny come up behind Icarus with what looked like a club of some sort “You know what darlin’ that makes two of us!” Benny swung the club against Icarus’ head and knocked him out cold. “You alright there, darlin’?” I stared down at the form below me “What are we going to do Benny? What if he wakes back up and it’s Icarus and not Castiel?”  Benny looked just as concerned as I did “Did Cas tell you anythin’ about this split-personality thing of his while you two were talkin’?”

I shook my head “No, he told me he had fits that he couldn’t control, but I don’t think this is what he meant. Because if you remember when he snapped on you before, he was able to come back to reality pretty quick, so I don’t think he had a split-personality until I  _ gave  _ it its name.” A low groan at my feet snagged my attention. “What… what happened, why does my head hurt?” Benny and I instantly backed away before speaking “Cas, that you? Cause if not I’m gonna hit your head with this again.” He slowly stood up still clutching the back of his head “What do you mean ‘is it me?’ Of course, it’s me, and what did you hit me with?”

I calmed down when he turned to face us, his eye back to that bright blue that I quickly became familiar with. “It’s Castiel Benny; you can put the club down.” Benny kept his eyes on Castiel “How can you tell? That other one could just be fakin’ how his voice sounds.” I sighed, “I know because Castiel’s left eye is normally blue and not black Benny, seriously man, you have the picture of him, you shouldn’t have to ask me this.” Benny went quiet for a moment which gave Castiel time to speak up again, “Heather, what are you talking about, I don’t understand.” Benny huffed and crossed his arms “You have a split personality Cas, that’s what she's tryin’ to tell ya.” He looked even more confused than before, “What do you remember Castiel?”

“I… I’m not sure, I remember our talk, I remember the story you told me and I remember you singing to me...I fell asleep, and then I… woke up on the floor.” I cursed under my breath, “It must have surfaced when he fell asleep then.” Benny nodded in response, “Seems like it, would explain why he don’t remember it.” I felt a hand on my shoulder, and I jerked backward only to see the hurt on Castiel’s face to my reaction. “What did I do, you have to tell me, please, Heather.” I sighed and motioned for him to sit down in front of me as he had done earlier.

I sat down and took a deep breath “After you had fallen asleep, Benny came to sit beside me, we were talking, and you growled at him. Your eye was black like it gets when you get angry, and you lunged at him. I caught you before you could get to him, and you started shaking. I thought it was one of your fits or something so I kept holding you, and you eventually collapsed on my shoulder. But when you spoke, it wasn’t you… it was someone else. He told me that you liked me, that I was pretty and that I smelled nice.”

Castiel wouldn’t look at me, so I continued, “I shoved him away, and that’s when I noticed the difference. His voice was higher pitched but still had your rough tone. He was almost childish, it was bizarre. He threw Benny into that wall over there and then pinned me against another one. I’m not going to repeat what he said to me because I don’t want to think about it. Then he said something about being his soul-mate or some bullshit like that.”

“So he has gotten stronger… I’m sorry, Heather, I should have warned you.” I looked at him in shock, “You mean you knew about him, and you didn’t think to mention it?!” Castiel flinched at my tone “I did mention him when I told you I was half demon I was serious. It just seems that my Demon side has become personified now,  did he tell you if he had a name?” I scoffed “Yeah, he said I named him, he said he liked the name  _ Icarus _ that it had a nice ring to it. He’s been reading my thoughts, too, or he was listening to our conversation.”

“He’s able to slip through my defenses even when I’m awake then. He will most likely resurface again. I should leave before he manages to do it again, if he allowed you to name him, then that means he has an attachment to you Heather, a very dangerous attachment.” Castiel stood up and picked up his jacket before turning to walk off “Cas wait!” He stopped and turned to look at me “Heather, I told you, the attachment that Icarus has is…” “Dangerous I know, which is why I’m going to say this now.” I grabbed his arm, “If it is as dangerous as what you are saying, then maybe you should stay.” He tilted his head and looked at me, confused, “Hear me out, okay? If it’s that dangerous, then you should come with us because what happens if he regains control again and I’m not around? He already said he wasn’t going to hurt me, but he didn’t say he wouldn’t hurt anyone else. I think that might be why he attacked Benny earlier, out of possession, he didn’t like it when he was sitting next to me I could tell.”

“Heather, I don’t understand how this is supposed to make me stay.” I sighed “Think about it Cas, if he is that possessive over me, then don’t you think he’ll go on a murder spree the second he finds out that I’m not around? He will kill anything that gets in the way of him finding me. That, and I like your company, Castiel, so please, stay.” Castiel looked at me with confliction written across his features, and I said something I never thought I would “Let me talk to him, Cas, let me talk to Icarus.” Castiel backed up and shook his head “Heathe I don’t think that is a good…..gahhh!” Castiel dropped to his knees and clutched at his head.

I dropped to the floor of the cave and placed my hands on Castiel’s shoulders “Don’t fight him Castiel, he will only hurt you if you do.” Castiel started to shake, trying to hold Icarus back “But… he’s… gahhh… he’s a demon.” I shook my head “I know what he is  Cas, but you need to let go before he hurts you, please.” Castiel suddenly dropped to his hands and knees, and I backed up a small step. That's when I heard the laugh that sent chills down my spine. 

“You know, typically when someones told they have a demon who has an attachment to them, they run like hell. But you, you can’t get enough of it, can you, sweetheart.” I took a deep breath, “You heard that?” He laughed again, that same dark laughter that I was starting to associate him with as he stood up and stared at me “Oh I heard everything sweetheart, especially when you told Cas that you weren’t going to repeat what I said to you when I had you pinned up against that wall.” 

My heart skipped when he once again backed me up until my back came into contact with the rock wall. “Now I find that interesting, you told him everything else, but you didn’t tell him that, why is that?” I didn’t answer him. Instead, I asked him a question, “So if you could hear everything, why doesn’t Cas remember everything?” He chuckled and shrugged his shoulders “No clue, but maybe it’s because I shut him out, or…” He grinned at me, a mischievous glint in his eye “He’s too much of an Angel to do what he secretly wants to do to you. But I’m not, so maybe, juuuust maybe…” I felt one of his wings gently trail one of its spikes along my back, and I shivered. A growl-like purr emanated from Icarus’ throat as he bent down just enough to whisper in my ear. “He lets me take full control so that he can sit back and watch the show.” 

He stepped back and looked at me almost sheepishly while he shrugged his shoulders a little too dramatically “But what do I know? It’s not like I’m in his head or anything. Oh wait, I am, and let me say, the thoughts he has about you, sweetheart… they would make an Angel sin, no pun intended of course.” I felt my face heat up “But that isn’t what you wanted to talk to me about, is it, sweetheart?” I heard Benny growl “Alright, I’ve had just about enough of you,  _ Icarus _ . She don’t like you, and I sure as hell don’t like you, so quit buggin’ her.”

Icarus turned his head, “Ah! Benny!” There was that childlike glee in his voice that I didn’t know how to deal with. “You know, Benny…” Icarus almost skipped over to Benny, and I had to hold back a laugh, this was ridiculous. “It’s rude to come up and hit someone over the head when they are trying to talk to another person, and I… I was having a very  _ important conversation _ . And…” Icarus stood toe to toe with Benny before grabbing him by the throat and lifting him off his feet. “I  _ don’t like being interrupted, understand?”  _

I couldn’t believe he changed so quickly  _ ‘Is he Bipolar too what the hell?!’  _ Icarus let out a deep chuckle and looked at me from over his shoulder “I could be if you want me to, sweetheart.” My mind went fuzzy  _ ‘Yes, I can read your thoughts, and you can hear mine, but only if I let you.’  _ I jumped, and I heard him laugh, “So jumpy today, aren’t you, sweetheart?” I glared at him “Get out of my head Icarus, and let Benny go, now.” I heard a sigh come from Icarus as he dropped Benny and turned to face me. “You aren’t letting me have any  _ fun _ with him. It’s like you like him or something… you don’t  _ like him, _ do you?” 

Icarus pinned me with his intense stare, but I held my ground “Maybe I do, Icarus, I mean he saved my life, fixed me some damn good food, and has an accent that I like to boot. So far the only thing going for you is Castiel, and he isn’t you.” I saw a hint of anger flash through those black eyes and my throat constricted. “Such  _ strong _ words from a  _ weak  _ mortal. But you know what?” I heard a flap of his wings, and he was in front of me. “I think you like me a little bit too. You said it yourself you wanted to talk to me. You even told poor little Castiel to give in when I was tearing my way through his mental walls to get to you… do you know how hard it is to do something like that? To tear down walls as strong as those? But you said you wanted to talk to me, so I decided I was going to break them until he couldn’t resist me anymore.”

“So tell me something, sweetheart.” Icarus wrapped an arm around my waist and pulled me against his chest. His skin was superheated, like touching leather that had been in the sun. He leaned down and growled lightly in my ear, “Do you  _ hate _ me? Or are you just pissed off, because I cause you to get  _ frustrated _ , hm?” His nails scratched down my back, and I shivered, “Because the way I see it, its  _ frustration _ , and if I’m right. All you have to do is  _ ask _ , and I’ll come out and play.” He held me with his obsidian gaze “So which is it, Heather? Is it hate?” He leaned down to whisper in my ear again, “Or is it  _ frustration _ .” He growled the word out, and I whimpered. I didn’t mean to, but the way he was talking was making it very hard to fight him.

“I can fix it for you. We can fix it for you. All you have to do is tell us, I’ll even let Castiel take over for you.” Icarus pulled away and tilted my head up to look in his eyes. I stared in awe as I saw his eye go from black to blue then to black again before finally settling on blue. “Heather…” Castiel stared down at me, his hold on me growing tighter as a rumble left his chest and I snapped underneath the pressure.


	6. Half God Half Devil

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song Half God Half Devil by In This Moment inspired this chapter  
> ::WARNING::  
> Slight mentions of smut ahead, don't read if you are under 18!

I watched as Castiel stared at me, restraint clear in his blue eye but the from the abyss I saw a shimmer. Icarus was there. I could see his smirk from the way the void of Castiel’s other eye glinted with mischief. _‘Observant aren’t you, sweetheart?’_ Castiel bent down, and I felt his breath against my neck, and I shivered _‘Do you want to see what real power looks like? We can show you, Sweetheart.’_ Icarus’ voice rang in my head, and I looked at Castiel, confused “He’s talking to you, isn’t he.” It wasn’t a question, and I nodded my head in response. _‘Oh don’t worry sweetheart, he can hear me too, now tell us… who do you want?’_

I looked them in the eyes, “Both.” The abyssal eye shined _‘You want the best of both, huh?’_ I nodded, and they lowered their head to my ear once again “Your wish is our command, Sweetheart.” The voice was low, and gravel filled like Castiel’s yet with the arrogance and demeanor of Icarus,’ and I felt myself cave in. “Oh, I think you like this, don’t you? Such a responsive little thing you are, such a _submissive_ little thing you are, aren’t you?” I whimpered again and backed up. I wasn’t much for talking during these situations. “Don’t be afraid, we aren’t going to hurt you, I’m not going to hurt you.” I looked into their eyes only to see Castiel’s side become more prominent again. “How about we put Icarus away for a minute, what do you think?”

Castiel’s eyes were sympathetic, and I nodded, and I watched the abyssal eye go dark, empty. Castiel reached his hand out to me, “Come here, Heather.” I stepped forward and took his hand. He pulled me into him and held me against him just like Icarus had done, but this time his skin was warm, not hot like before and I nuzzled into it. “Do you trust me, Heather?” He gently pushed me away, and I locked my gaze with his and nodded. “Say it, tell me that you trust me.” My heart skipped a beat as I answered him, “I trust you, Castiel.”

He nodded his head and pulled me against him again “You’re so small, so fragile, something as fragile as you needs protecting… I can do that. Will you let me do that for you, let me be your guardian angel?” I nodded my head, “Yes, Castiel.” A rumble came from his chest “Show me your wings, Heather.” I spread my wings to their full span and moved them so that they were circling him. He gently ran a hand along them, and a faint blue glow came from his hand and into my wing. My wings started to glow with blue colored veins, and my breath stuttered at the sight. “Don’t fight it, trust me, and let the feeling spread through them.” He moved and did the same with the other wing, which had the same effect.

He gently tugged on my shirt “Take this off for me. I want to try something.” I was hesitant for a moment, “Don’t be nervous… it’s going to be okay.” His blue eye shone with good intentions, and I slowly removed my shirt. He ran his hands up and down my sides gently in a soothing manner before slowly moving his hands around to my back. “You are beautiful. I can understand why your name is Heather. Beautiful yet delicate like a little flower. My little flower, my flower with angel wings.” He pulled me close to him again and kissed me gently. I sighed and wrapped my arms around his neck and into his hair. 

“You like doing that, messing with my hair, why?” He was trailing kisses down my neck as he asked the question, and I found it difficult to form words. “Come on, you can tell me.” He kissed a particular spot on the left side of my neck, and I gripped his hair harder before answering him as best as I could. “Because it’s soft, and it’s thick enough to where I could mess it up if I wanted too.” He gently picked me up, and I wrapped my legs around his waist as he gently pushed me against the cave wall. “You want to mess my hair up?” He bit down gently on that precise spot before sucking gently on it, and I mewled pulling on his hair, pulling a slight growl from his throat. “Mess it up then.” He came back up and kissed me deeply while pushing me firmly against the wall and wrapping his hand into my short hair and pulling gently.

I sighed, and he breathed deeply slipping his tongue into my mouth. His hand traveled to my spine, where my wings formed from my back and gently scratched in a downward motion. I shivered under his touch and returned the gesture, though I scratched with a bit more force. A deep growl came from him, followed by an almost pained groan. “Be careful, Heather, if you keep doing that, I can’t promise that I can hold Icarus back.” I nodded and nuzzled into his neck as he carefully set me down “Can I see your wings, Castiel?” He sucked in a breath, and I gently kissed up and down his neck “Please, Cas?” He gently backed away from me “Close your eyes.” 

I closed my eyes just as a blinding light filled the room before disappearing again. “Okay, you can open them now.” I slowly opened my eyes to see Castiel holding his wings close to himself, almost like he was ashamed of them. I stepped towards him and pulled him into another kiss, running my hands over his shoulders and onto his wings. “They’re beautiful Castiel.” He sighed and looked away from me “There’s nothing left of them.” As he said that a large black feather came loose and fell away from the top of his wing. I gently caught it and lightly felt of the feather; it was soft to the touch and seemed to hum with an energy all its own. “You’re damaged and broken Cas…” He flinched and tucked his wings away from my sight. I put my hand on his face and gently turned him to look at me. “But that’s okay because so am I. When I look at these wings I see someone who fought for what he believed in, that’s an honorable thing Castiel, don’t you let anyone tell you differently, not even Dean, understand?”

He looked at me and tears filled his blue eye, and I shushed him gently “Don’t cry Castiel. I’m here now, and I’m not going to let anyone hurt you like that again. Consider me your guardian as well, alright?” He didn’t speak, but he pushed me back against the wall and scratched at my sides as another bright light filled the room. When the light dimmed, his wings were whole once again, and I gasped as he raised them above his head. His eye was glowing with a bright blue light as he placed both his hands on my wings. He whispered something that I didn’t understand, and I felt my wings tingle. When I looked back at them, every other metal feather was colored black instead of the silver that they were before, and I gasped.

His eye slowly stopped glowing, and he locked gazes with me before speaking. “When a claim is made on a human soul, it leaves a mark, a brand. Consider this my mark and my claim. You. Are. Mine.” His wings enveloped me in a soft embrace as he dropped to his knees in front of me and began kissing my stomach. “My angel with metal wings…” His voice trailed off as he kept kissing down my stomach looking up at me while he did so, and I melted into his touch. He tapped the button on my jeans and looked up at me with a silent question, and I merely nodded my head. 

He gently pulled my pants down and helped me step out of them. He kissed up one leg then the other making a purring like sound and wrapping his wings tighter around me like a blanket. I nuzzled into one and gently blew on the feathers making them shift slightly. His wing jerked back somewhat before returning to its original position. I did it again, and it did the same thing, and I jumped when I felt Castiel grab onto my hips and put his head against my hip bone and shake a little. “You okay?” I gently pet his hair, and he nodded, “It tickles.” I giggled a little and scratched his head “You are like a big puppy, you know that Cas?”

“If you think he’s a puppy, you ought to see him fight somethin’ darlin’. You might change your tone.” Benny was leaned up against the wall looking at me “Thanks for earlier. I wasn’t gonna get out of that one without your help darlin’ so thanks.” I nodded just to hear a low and deep growl come from my feet. Icarus had taken over again, and he stood wrapping his arms around me and pulling my back against his chest. “Icarus… seriously?” He chuckled and nipped down my neck “Just making a claim of my own, sweetheart. Can’t let Cas have all the fun now can we?” His nails dug into my hips as he growled into my ear, “Why don’t you let me have a turn hm? I know what you need, what you crave, what you like. I could tell the second you scratched your nails down our back.”

He bit down on my neck, and I couldn’t help but let out a slight growl of my own as I reached my arm around his neck and gripped his hair once again. “Hm submissive yet feisty, I like it. You gonna try to fight me, sweetheart?” He pulled me tight against his chest and wrapped his arm around my chest to gently grip my throat. He bit my neck again, and I gasped tilting my head to give him more access. 

I heard Icarus chuckle “Well now that _is_ interesting, makes me wonder what would happen if I…” Without warning, he bit down hard, holding me tight against him when I tried to struggle. A growl ripped through his throat, and I instantly stilled as he removed his teeth from my neck. “Easy sweetheart.” He came around me to face me, and he tilted my head up to look at him. He leaned down and kissed me a growl coming from his chest as he pulled me against him and wrapped his hand into my hair, pulling it to access my throat. He licked on the place he had bitten, and I moaned a little, the bite hurt but strangely enough, the pain felt good. He bit it gently and sucked on the wound, and I panted “Such a little masochist, this will be fun, but I am curious about one thing…” He looked at me and his obsidian eyes shined like he knew something. _‘I can let him join if you want. I know you’ve been thinking about it, his teeth in your neck… such a sinful little thing.’_

Icarus gave a side glance over to the wall where Benny was standing, and I blushed. “Oh come on, don’t be nervous now, you said it yourself you liked him, you told me that, _remember_?” I ruffled my wings, and Icarus started at them “So he did put a claim on you then? That's an interesting mark he put on you actually, kind of what an angel’s wings look like when they are killed. But that's none of my business is it?” I saw a glow come from Icarus’ eyes and he flinched “Ouch, someone is testy today it seems.” The light went out before coming back with what I could only describe as a vengeance as thunder rumbled outside of the cave. Icarus fell to his knees with a growl and a pained groan, and my heart dropped. Whatever he had said had pissed Castiel off, horribly. 

I crouched and put my hand on Icarus’ shoulder “You know Icarus… I’m not a demon like you, but even I know not to piss off an Angel. I’d apologize if I were you.” Icarus looked at me and growled just to clutch at his head again. “See darlin’ I told you Cas ain’t a puppy. He’ll kick some serious ass if he thinks someone he cares about is gettin’ hurt. It looks to me like that’s what's happenin’ here. Remindin’ a demon of his place in the hierarchy, I think.” I felt my wings tingle like there was electricity buzzing in the air right before a loud clap of thunder and flash of lightning resounded throughout the cave.

I felt my spine tingle, the energy and power coming from Castiel was immense, and I shivered. “You might want to give in Icarus. I think this is a firm reminder before he ends up smitein’ you to watch your mouth.” I saw an almost scared look cross Icarus’ eyes before the blue of Castiel’s eye came back and gazed at me. “Did he hurt you?” I nodded my head, “Only a little, nothing too bad, though.” Castiel stood up and brought me with him before tilting my head gently to look at the damage. “He’s angry that I claimed you before he could.” I felt something warm on the wound before feeling the pain go away completely. 

 “I didn’t scare you, did I?” I shook my head “No… it was kind of hot actually.” Castiel hummed and ran his hands over my wings again “I’ll keep that in mind then. Do you trust me enough to try something?” I nodded my head instantly, “Yes.” He smiled and kissed me deeply once again, “Good.” He looked at Benny and motioned him over. Benny moved away from the wall and stood next to me, but a respectful distance away. The way Benny backed up and spoke told me that Castiel had probably talked to him through telepathy. “Now hang on a second Cas, I ain’t too sure if this is a good idea. I mean she’s your girl, not mine.” Castiel hardened his gaze as he stared Benny down. “You will not get this chance again Benny, now take it or leave it.” There was that show of position of power, and I shivered again. “Alright fine, fine, c’mere darlin’.” Benny reached his hand out to me, and I took it as he gently pulled me over.

“You trust me, don’t you?” I nodded my head, and he sighed and drew me in for a hug. “If I do anythin’ you don’t like you tell me, understand?” I nuzzled into him and nodded my head “Consider this my thanks for earlier than.” He tilted my chin up and kissed me gently and lightly as if to ask if it was okay. I grabbed onto his jacket and pulled him closer to me, and he immediately kissed me deeper. I moaned when I felt Castiel come up from behind me and scratch down my back before stroking over my wings.

When Castiel pressed his chest against my back, it was only then that I realized that he had shed any clothes that he had on previously. Castiel gently grabbed my shoulder and spun me around to face him. Benny pressed himself against my back and wrapped his arms around my waist, bending his head down to my neck and breathing in deeply before letting out a growl. “I’ll give that demon one thing darlin’ you do smell good.” I felt something sharp graze against my neck, and I jumped slightly. Castiel put a hand on my face and turned my head to look at him “He isn’t going to hurt you, with my help, it’s going to feel good, okay?”


	7. I'm Only Human Sometimes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ::WARNING::  
> Smut ahead, don't read if you're under 18!

I heard Benny growl again as the sharp points, of what I could only assume were his fangs, grazed against my neck again. Castiel kissed me and trailed his hand down my chest hooking a finger in the front of my bra and gently tugging on it. “This is in the way.” He snapped his fingers, and suddenly, I was standing utterly bare against the vampire and the angel. “Such a pretty little flower you are, my charge.” He lowered his head and kissed down the opposite side of my neck before hitting his knees again and kissing across my chest. He kissed one of my nipples, and I gasped, grabbing onto his hair. He tilted his head at me and gently licked at it, and I moaned “Cas…” 

He suddenly latched onto it and started to suck gently on it while using his fingers to stimulate the other one. I cried out and tugged on his hair as my head landed on Benny’s shoulder. He growled and began gently nipping at my neck, wrapping his arms tighter around my waist. “You ready darlin’?” I couldn’t speak, so I merely nodded my as Castiel suddenly switched from one nipple to the other biting at it slightly and looking up at me. A bright light filled the room again, and Castiel’s wings spread out wide. I gasped and wrapped my arm around the back of Benny’s neck as I felt his fangs slowly slide into my throat. “Oh fuck…” I gasped out as Castiel stood up and kissed me, delving his tongue into my mouth.

I felt Benny start to feed from my neck, and I moaned into Castiel’s mouth. Benny groaned loud as he fed from me, not enough to do damage, just enough to make me feel good. I felt Castiel’s hand trail down from my neck down to my pelvic bone. He traced the bones of my hips with his hand gently before whispering into my ear “Now it’s my turn, are you ready?” I mewled and moved my hips into his hand and nearly collapsed when he slid a finger into my core. Benny held me up and removed his fangs from my neck “Looks like you’ve got some power over this one Cas, where’d you learn to do all this anyway?”

Castiel looked at Benny with the blankest expression “I learned it from the Pizza Man.” Benny chuckled “Yeah I’ve heard about this story never thought an angel would watch porn though. Twice even.” I struggled to get my words out “Wait…. You watch…. You watch porn?” Castiel looked at me with a glint in his eye and curled his finger in a “come here” motion, and I lost it. “Maybe I have, but I don’t hear you complaining. I certainly don’t  _ feel _ you complaining either.” He slipped another finger inside and pumped them in and out of me slowly.

Castiel gave Benny a look, and Benny stepped away while still holding my waist “You got her Cas?” Castiel wrapped his wings around me “I do, thank you, we will return shortly.” Benny nodded and leaned back against the wall again. “And to think I almost said no, you know?” Castiel nodded, and I felt the space around us shift, and suddenly, I was placed on something soft and warm.

It was a bed somewhere inside the cave, and I looked up at Castiel confused. “You know Cas if I didn’t know any better, I’d say you were waiting for me.” He gave me a knowing look, “Maybe I have been.” He added another finger and set a steady rhythm with his hand. I squirmed and gripped the blankets into my fists and arched my back. “Cas… Cas please.” He suddenly stopped, and I shot him a pleading gaze, “Cas…” My voice was pleading. “Say my full name, Heather. I want to hear you say it.” He curled his fingers again, and I broke “ _ Castiel _ … please.”

I heard him groan and his wings spanned the room in a single flap before he removed his fingers from my core and moved to hover over me. “You’ve been waiting for me? How long?” I watched as Castiel allowed his wings to drop, enveloping the bed like a curtain. “A long time, I didn’t recognize you, because of my… condition. I can’t see your soul as clearly anymore, not like I used to be able to. Which is why…” 

His wings brushed against mine with a light touch, and I almost came off the bed from my back arching so hard as a moan fell from my lips. “I gave you these.” I snapped my eyes open and stared at him “It was you?” He leaned down and kissed my chest down to my stomach, to my hips, and further south until his mouth was hovering over my core. “It was.” His hand followed the path of his mouth, and his thumb settled gently on my clit. Before I could ask him anything else, he slipped his tongue inside me and began rubbing small circles into my clit.

All I could do was moan and squirm until suddenly there was a force holding me down, a power I couldn’t see. “Cas!” He stopped just like he had before and looked up at me with an intense gaze that I coward under. “I commanded armies once… you will show me some respect.” His tone was severe, and I couldn’t help but thrust my hips up if only just a little.  _ “Castiel please.” _ He stuck his tongue in me again and rubbed my clit fast. I felt a knot form in my stomach like a tightening spring.

His free hand went to my right side and scratched down my ribs, leaving scratch marks, and I screamed as I came hard.  _ “Castiel!” _ A rumbling groan came from his chest as he licked and sucked my core clean before coming back up and kissing me, sticking his tongue in my mouth. I reached around and pulled at his feathers, and he groaned louder, pushing his wings into my hands. When he broke away from the kiss, his eye was glowing with that bright blue light as he stared down at me. I instantly released his feathers “I’m sorry, I didn’t hurt you did I?” He shook his head “No, it felt good, do it again, please.”

I complied and tugged on his feathers again only to hear him growl out a swear.  _ “Fuck.” _ I gently stroked his wings and kissed him again. “Please  _ Castiel _ no more teasing… I need you.” He looked at me and nodded before positioning himself and slowly sliding in. He groaned deep in his throat as he pushed himself all the way in, I constricted against him, and he gave an involuntary thrust of his hips. I placed my hands on his back in between his wings and clawed at him. A deep growl came from him, and I saw his blue eye flash black. His abyssal eye gleamed at me, “You called,  _ sweetheart _ ?” I grabbed Icarus’ hair and pulled him into a kiss and scratched the side of his neck and jaw gently. I clenched around him just like I had Castiel, and he growled low in my ear before giving me a hard thrust, and  I moaned loud.

“You make the most  _ erotic _ sounds, and I love it.” He started at a slow yet deliberate pace, and I unfolded beneath him, “Such a  _ good girl _ .” I mewled and bucked my hips up against him. “Icarus, please.” He snarled and raked his nails down my chest pulling a moan from me “Finally, that’s what I’ve wanted to hear. Repeat it for me.” He gave an extra strong thrust, and I screamed, “Icarus!” He grunted and sped up. I heard a flap, and his leather wings were spread in place of Castiel’s “Yes, that’s it, sweetheart.” I grabbed at his wings and tugged on them as he continued to drive into me.

I felt the familiar knot forming in my stomach again, and Icarus sensed it. “Are you close sweetheart?” I nodded and brought him into another kiss and slipped my tongue into his mouth. He growled and pulled my hair, exposing my throat before attaching his mouth to it and biting down again. I moaned louder “That’s it, sweetheart, let go and cum for me… come on, don’t fight it just let go.” He ran his nails down my chest again, and I lost control and came once more constricting around him. _“Oh, God, fuck!”_ Icarus growled out. My mind went blank and clung onto him as he followed behind me with a roar. I looked into his eye and saw the bright light from Castiel’s power shine through as more thunder cracked shaking the room and probably the cave as I saw the shadow of his wings appear on the wall behind him.

Castiel pulled out and collapsed beside me, pulling me into him just as Benny showed up just outside the room. “Listen Cas, I’m glad you had a good time and what-not, but your display has drawn a hell of a lot of attention. They’ve got the place surrounded — everything from Vampires to Leviathan. I felt Castiel tense and grab onto me tightly, kissing me again. “Get her out of here Benny; I’ll hold them off for as long as I can.” He snapped his fingers, and I was suddenly redressed with my weapons attached. “Cas…” Benny came up and grabbed my arm “Heather come on we gotta get out of here darlin’.” Castiel stood up and grabbed hold of both of us “I’ll get you as close to the portal as I can, but you two have to do the rest. I’ll be fine. Benny, you had better get her out of here safely.” Benny nodded, and the room shifted again, and we were standing in the woods. Everything was off, water was flowing up instead of down, leaves were floating, and the energy seemed charged. “Alright, darlin’ let's do this.” He grabbed my arm and drug me to the portal.


	8. Goodbye

“Benny wait!” I yanked my arm back, trying to stop him from dragging me to a glowing blue light that seemed to undulate and shimmer. He stopped and turned to look at me “Heather we gotta get out of here…” I shook my head “We can’t just leave him! I won’t leave him here, Benny! I… I promised him that I would help him escape… I promised…” Benny sighed and looked at me sympathetically “Heather listen… the last time he got out… it wasn’t through this portal. The way he got out last time was by the help of Angels. I hate to say it darlin’ I do, but… I don’t think they will help him this time.”

My heart shattered, “But Benny we can’t just…” He pulled me into a hug, and I clung to him, feeling tears start to brim my eyes. “We have to Heather, okay? Maybe when we get out of here, we can find Sam and Dean. I’m sure they would be willing to help him out, but we have to get to them first, and to do that we have to leave this place.” I shook my head and felt my body begin to shake “They’ll kill him before we can get help, Benny. He can’t go up against all those monsters by himself… he’ll… he’ll die.”

“Heather.” I spun around to see Castiel standing behind me “Heather listen, you have to go. I don’t know how long that portal will stay open or if it will ever come back, you have to go.” I looked into his eyes to see his blue eye turn to steel, and it wasn’t a suggestion, it was an order. “Cas…” He grabbed me and brought me into a hug that nearly crushed me. “Listen to him, sweetheart, we will be okay, I promise.” Icarus had slipped through, and I sniffled, “Yeah, and demons are known for their promises and keeping their words.” He chuckled “They are if they are crossroad demons, pacts bind them if they break it well… their hounds turn on them, nasty business.”

I looked up at him, “You talk like you have experience in that.” He nodded, “I’ve heard the stories. Now you do need to go; we will be fine. Find that Winchester brother for me. We have some business to settle, and I know you want it settled just as bad, don’t you, sweetheart?” There was a roar in the distance and the sound of something bounding through the trees. “Oh hell, darlin’ we gotta go now.”   
  
Something slid down out of Icarus’ and Castiel’s sleeve. It was a long blade with three edges attached to a silver handle. “Heather, go now. I will hold them off.” Castiel’s voice came back, low and demanding, his blue eye glowing as he stared at me. “You sure an Angel-Blade is gonna kill that gorilla-wolf Cas?” He glared at Benny with his glowing eye and Benny backed up “Okay okay… sorry.” Thunder rumbled as lightning flashed around us. “Get her out of here Benny. Now. Get her to Sam and Dean…” Castiel’s eye turned black as Icarus resurfaced again, “And get them to get us the hell out of here.”

They gave me one last hug before gently pushing me back into Benny’s arms. “C’mon darlin’ they can hold their own, especially Cas, now let's go.” I took a deep breath and nodded, “Okay, let's go.” Benny grabbed my arm gently and turned it over so that my wrist was exposed. “Do you remember what I told you when we were talking in my house, Heather? Remember how I told you that Dean got me out of here once?” I nodded my head “Alright, I need you to do the same thing.” He handed me his blade, and I cut my arm. “Might wanna hurry up there sweetheart, these things are moving pretty quick!” Icarus spread his wings and raised them over his head, the spikes on his wings seeming to grow longer and sharper. Benny took the blade and made an identical cut across his arm. “Alright darlin’ when I grab your arm, I need you to say these words okay? We only have one shot at this if we want to get out of this place in time. Conjuncti sumus, unum sumus. Got it?”

I nodded my head, and he grabbed my arm with his hand pressing our cuts together. “See you on the other side, darlin’.” I concentrated and repeated the words Benny had told me,  _ “Conjuncti sumus, unum sumus!”  _  Benny was covered in red and white light as his body seemed to fragment before being sucked into my arm.  It hurt like hell for a few seconds before the wound healed over, and an orange glow could be seen under my skin. “That doesn’t look weird at all…” I felt something drape over my shoulders only to realize it was Icarus’ jacket. “There, use that to cover it up, and as something to remember us by, now go.” He shoved me gently towards the portal just as monsters were surrounding them. I saw a bright light emit from their form as Castiel’s wings were projected astrally and I entered the portal.


	9. Welcome Home

I stumbled and fell as the portal spit me out somewhere I didn’t recognize “Well this is… this is just great.” My arm started to burn, and I lifted the sleeve of the jacket “Benny, you doing okay in there?” The glow moved, and I watched as my skin rippled and rolled with it. “Okay not looking at that anymore.” I pulled out the picture of Dean from my pocket and flipped it over to see if there was possibly anything written on the back to point me in a direction. “Lebanon, Kansas? You have got to be kidding me, seriously, Benny? Kansas?” I felt his soul shift, and I cringed, “Okay, can you not move so much, please? That feels unpleasant.” I was near a road, and it looked like there was a structure with a black Chevy Impala sitting outside of it. My head started to hurt, and I dropped to my knees, grabbing my head. _“Sorry if this hurts darlin’, that's Dean’s car, so they must be in there, go see.”_

__

I mentally cursed him for causing that amount of pain in my head and pulled the jacket sleeve down and walked up to the car. “He has a nice taste in cars; I’ll give him that at least.” Benny caused my arm to burn again, and I rolled my eyes “Okay okay, I’m going, calm down.” I went down the stairs and carefully opened the metal door. The inside of the place was huge and surprisingly extremely clean and modern.

A set of metal stairs led down to a brightly lit room with a strangely shaped table with five to six chairs placed around it. The table looked like it had notes and papers sitting on it, so I went down the stairs to take a look. I hadn’t gotten very far when none other than Dean came from another room. A gun was immediately drawn on me “Who the hell are you, don’t you know it's stupid to just come into someone's home?” I put my hands up “Easy; hey listen I’m sorry for barging in unannounced, but I don’t exactly have the number to this place…” The gun was cocked, “Okay smartass, tell me what you’re doing here.”

I sighed, “Listen, I need you and your brother’s help, please.” He walked over to me; the gun still aimed at me while yelling over his shoulder. “Hey, Sammy! Get in here we have company!” It wasn’t, but a few moments later when a tall man stepped into view, he had long brown hair and big doe brown eyes. “Yeah Dean what's up? Who is she?” Sam seemed to be more laid back than his brother “That’s what I’m trying to find out.” Sam rolled his eyes “Okay well maybe if you took the gun off of her, she might talk to you? You and I know nothing but a human can get in here, this place is warded like Fort Knox.” 

Dean lowered the gun, and Sam came and pulled out a chair “Come sit down, Dean normally isn’t like this, I swear.” I nodded and sat in the chair as the two brothers sat on either side of me. “Okay, what’s your name, and how can we help?” I laid my arm palm up on the table “My name is Heather, and I need your help with this, he told me Dean did this for him once. Told me to ask him so here it goes…” I pulled the sleeve up and showed Dean the writhing glowing soul in my arm. “Benny says hi by the way.”

Dean looked at me in shock “No way, Benny?! That’s impossible. I killed him myself; he should be back in Purgatory.” I grabbed Dean’s blade that he used in Purgatory and laid it on the table. “Yeah, about that… I think this is yours, right?” Dean grabbed it and turned it over, “Yeah, yeah, it sure is.” He looked at my arm then looked at me “How long has he been in there?” Benny’s soul glew and I heard him in my head again. _“Tell him I said to hurry the hell up. Tell him I don’t want to wait around like last time.”_  

“He’s been in here long enough that he is getting impatient and wants you to hurry the hell up and not to keep him waiting like last time. His words, not mine I swear, don’t shoot the messenger please.” Dean chuckled “Alright you, son of a bitch; I’ll help you out.” Dean stood up and removed some keys from his pocket “I’ll be back in a bit alright, Sammy? Come on, kid, let's get that vamp out of your arm.” Dean led me back up the stairs and out the door to the Impala. “Hey Dean, I like your car, how does she run?” He started the engine as I got into the passenger seat and she purred like a kitten.

“Baby runs perfect, and that’s saying something, considering how many times I’ve had to rebuild her.” He turned on the radio, and I almost squealed, but I held it in. “House rules kid, driver picks the music, shotgun shuts his cakehole, understand.” I laughed, “Are you kidding me; I love this stuff, I was raised on it actually, got to have some respect for the classics. Though I do tend to listen to more modern style rock, the old style has something that rock doesn’t have today.”

My arm burned again, and I sucked in a breath, “Okay okay Benny, for the love of God…” Dean put the car into gear, and we started driving. “So you wanna tell me how you got mixed up with Benny?” I was looking out the window as he drove and I refocused my attention when he spoke. “I don’t know how I got into Purgatory if that is what you are asking. But he saved me from a vampire that was trying to eat me, and he saved me from some gorilla-wolves too, that’s what he said you called them anyway. He said he would help me get out if I helped him get out, so here we are. He’s a good friend you know, he told me stories about you, he’s pretty fond of you I think. Said you two were like brothers once.”

Dean chuckled “Hell yeah we were, how did you find us anyway?” I shrugged, “Honestly, the portal just kinda spit me out in front of your place; I saw the car, and Benny told me to go inside.” Dean nodded and pulled into an empty field with a windmill “Um… what are we doing here?” Dean got out of the car and went to the trunk, “You want him out of you, don’t you?” He grabbed a shovel and shut the trunk “Come on, oh  and by the way, your arm is gonna hurt like hell, just a warning.” I groaned “Thanks…” We walked until we were standing in front of the windmill, and Dean started digging. 

He dug until he had practically buried himself before hopping out of the grave. “Okay, come here and give me your arm.” I sat down and looked into the grave, the bones there looked old. “Jeez, he has been in Purgatory for a while, even before you found him, huh?” Dean nodded, “Yeah, but he's stubborn and refuses to die.” Dean cut my arm where Benny’s soul was squirming around. “Alright, you know what to say?” I looked at him and shook my head only for my arm to have a sharp pain go through it. “Ow, hey, that isn’t my fault, you didn’t tell me part two of this plan.” Dean laughed, “Yeah, that’s Benny, alright. Okay, so what you need to say is this: Anima corpori. Fuerit corpus totem resurgent. Got it?” 

I nodded and repeated the mantra just like I did to absorb Benny’s soul. _“Anima corpori. Fuerit corpus totem resurgent!”_ Benny’s soul slowly drained out of my arm, and I flinched, “Owwww, seriously dude, come on.” I heard a sigh, “Again, Dean, why the hell does this take you so long?” Dean stood up and walked over to Benny “Benny; it’s good to see you, man. Why didn’t you come back with Sam?” Benny shrugged “I didn’t belong here Dean, you know that. But I might stick around this time; I need a vacation.” 

They gave each other a hug and Benny walked over to me and helped me up “Sorry about all that darlin’ you okay?” I glared at him, “Yeah, having a soul squirm around feels great.” He chuckled and pulled me into a hug before looking down at the jacket. “He gave that to you I take it?” I nodded and looked over to Dean, “Dean. This isn’t just about Benny… It's about Castiel.” Dean looked like he had been punched in the gut. “The hell are you talking about? Don’t tell me he’s in there too cause I don’t know if that will work on him.” I looked down, and Benny spoke up “No brother, he's in Purgatory… again.”


	10. Oh Death

“Wait, hold on a second, say that one more time?” Everyone was sitting around the table in the bunker. “Castiel is in Purgatory, and he needs our help.” Sam looked at Dean with wide eyes “So that explains why we haven’t seen him, he’s in Purgatory, but why?” I took a deep breath and looked at Dean “Because someone told him that no one cared that he was broken. He told me that when he got his memories back, he was having a tough time with things and that’s what someone told him. He also said that the Angels in heaven won’t take him back because of what he’s become and that the demons of hell won’t take him because he’s an Angel… sort of.”

“What do you mean sort of?” Sam and Dean spoke at the same time as they looked between Benny and me. “Your little angel friend has got a demon inside him. A demon who is super dangerously attached to Heather apparently.” Dean looked angry while Sam looked concerned. “What do you mean he has a demon inside him?” Dean angrily stood up and started pacing, “Exactly what they said Sam, some demonic son of a bitch is possessing Cas.” 

“Actually it's not that simple Dean…” Dean stopped pacing and crossed his arms “Sure, it is all we gotta do is exorcise the mother, and Cas should be fine.” Benny placed his hand on my shoulder as I tensed. “Listen to her brother, it really ain’t that simple, trust me.” I gripped onto Icarus’ jacket and pulled it close to me as Dean sat down and stared at me. “Dean he isn’t  _ possessed _ by a demon… because of his broken mind… he’s become a demon, or at least partly, he's half angel and half demon. It’s like a split personality that I accidentally personified by naming him on accident.”

“You  _ named _ it?” I huddled closer to Benny at Dean’s tone “What do you mean you  _ named  _ it?” I pulled the jacket closer to my body as my wings shifted underneath it. “It was an accident, I was telling Cas a story, and it took the name from the character of the story as it’s name I guess.” Dean rolled his eyes as Sam spoke up, “So, what name has it taken on?” I looked up at Benny, and he nodded for me to continue “His name is Icarus, you know the story of Icarus right?” Sam nodded his head “Yeah story of the guy who flew too close to the sun with wings made of wax, I know it.”

Benny cleared his throat “So is there any way we can get him out of Purgatory? I know the Angel’s got him out last time, but I don’t think they will help him now considering he’s part demon now.” Dean sighed and got up from his chair “I’m taking Baby for a drive, I’ll be back later.” He pulled out his keys and left the bunker, slamming the door behind him. 

I looked over at Sam, and he looked equally as upset “So do you have any ideas of how to get him out? We can’t just leave him in there Sam, help me, please. He needs help, as much as he helped you and your brother…” Sam sighed and crossed his hands on the table and looked up at me. “He also betrayed us, Heather, he was working with Crowley, the King of Hell to get Purgatory open. He tricked us and then killed a bunch of people when he got control over those souls.” I nodded my head, “I know, he told me the story. But he told me he just wanted to feel appreciated for once, so he got power hungry.” 

Sam gave a slight scoff “He was appreciated, he was like family to Dean and to me. Yeah, what Dean said to him about no one caring about him being broken was harsh…” “ _ Harsh? _ You’re kidding me, right? Sam, it was  _ cruel _ .” He looked at me funny, “You care a lot about him, don’t you?” I nodded my head and carefully removed Icarus’ jacket from over my shoulders. “This jacket belongs to Icarus, Castiel’s style of dress has changed, dramatically. Or at least that's what I can gather from this.” I carefully fished the photo of Cas out of my pocket and handed it to Sam.

“He isn’t the same Angel anymore, Sam, he needs help.” Sam was about to answer me when Dean came back into the bunker with a paper bag “Alright, if we are gonna get Cas out of Purgatory, we are gonna need some serious help.” I looked up as I heard Dean speak, “Hello again to you too.” He rolled his eyes and set the items on the table “Dean, are you sure about this, I mean I don’t think he’s going to like us too much since we bound him. Remember?” I looked at the items with confusion as Dean started to draw weird symbols on the table “Yeah well he’s just going to have to get over it, that's why I brought food, it might calm him down, keep him from reaping us.”

“Wait reaping, as in Death?” Dean nodded as he put the ingredients in the bowl “Exactly, hope you’re ready, Heather, cause you’re about to meet Death himself.” I looked up at Benny, “Please tell me he’s kidding.” Benny shrugged his shoulders “I got no idea darlin’ we are just gonna have to wait and see I think.” Dean cleared his throat and recited the Incantation “Te nunc invoco, mortem. Te in mea potestate defixi. Nunc et in aeternum!”

“Now what did I say about trying to bind me again, Dean?” I spun around only to see a rather skinny old man holding a cane in his hand. “Listen, I know alright, I don’t need another lecture. What I need is your help.” Death walked around the table slowly and picked up Icarus’ leather jacket examining it “I know what you want, Dean. You want your little angel friend Castiel out of Purgatory, right?” Sam spoke up next, “Yeah, we do? Will you help us?” Death looked at them both and turned his back on them “No.” He started to walk off, and I ran up to him and grabbed onto his arm.

“Wait, please, listen I’m sorry Dean is an asshole…” “Hey!” Dean remarked when I called him that but I continued to speak, “But please… help him.” Death turned around and gazed down at me “Heather, the girl with the metal wings and Castiel’s charge no less. Also the soul-mate to the demon named Icarus, how did you get mixed up with the Winchesters and their… vampire friend?” I backed away in shock, “You know about…” “Oh dear, I know about everything…” He bent down low and whispered in my ear, “I even know about your little… revenge plan on a certain someone in this room.”

“What do you mean metal wings? Soul-Mates? What are you talking about?” I lowered my head and turned to face Dean. “Remember that dangerous attachment that Icarus has to me? That’s it, I’m his soul-mate, his and Castiel’s apparently.” Dean laughed, “You’re kiddin’ me, right? Soul-Mates, you mean like the mushy romance novel stuff?” I looked to Death for a better explanation, but he didn’t offer any help “What does is he talking about when he mentioned metal wings, Heather?” I shrunk under Sam’s gaze, and Benny came over to my side and squeezed my shoulder “It’ll be alright darlin’ show them.” I huddled into his side “Dean, you got a knife, brother?” Dean nodded and handed Benny a large buck-knife. Benny gently pushed me back and turned me around, grabbing the back of my shirt. 

“Alright darlin’ hold real still for me, I don’t wanna cut you, for obvious reasons.” I held still as Benny cut two slits in my shirt before backing up. “Alright, darlin’ your turn.” I took a deep breath and slowly unfurled my wings, causing a metallic sound like rubbing silverware across each other to resound through the room. I gave them a quick flap allowing them to reach their full span. “Okay...what the hell are those?! What the hell are you?!” Dean pulled his gun on me again, and I wrapped my wings around myself as Dean fired off a shot. Benny moved in front of me, and the bullet hit him in the shoulder. “Dean stop it what are you doing?!” Sam grabbed Dean and took the gun, “What the hell, man?”

“Benny are you okay?” Benny groaned and dropped to his knees, and I followed him down. I unwrapped my wings from around myself and wrapped them around Benny instead. “Yeah… I’m alright… are you okay?” I nodded my head, and Death cleared his throat “You have just caused a disturbance Dean, and a certain demon is very unhappy with you.” Dean rolled his eyes “So, I’ve ganked demons before, I’ll do it again.” I heard a laugh come from the other side of the room, and I recognized it immediately.

“You can try, Dean.” Everyone spun around at the same time, except for Death who seemed utterly unfazed “Cas? That you buddy?” I stood up slowly “Again, why does everyone keep calling me that? It’s quite...hm...annoying.” Icarus was standing there with his arms crossed. “Icarus…?” He turned his head to look at me “Ah! Hello sweetheart!” I looked at him, confused, “How did you…” “He hasn’t, he’s not out, are you,  _ Icarus?”  _ A growl came from Icarus as he moved to stand over me, keeping his eyes on Dean. 

“No I’m not out, but thanks to your little angel friend, I can project myself under certain circumstances. Like this one, for example, any particular reason you shot at her? Hm? Dean?” Icarus reached out and touched my wings “Did he hurt you?” He crouched down to look at me “No, Icarus, Benny took the bullet for me.”

“Yeah, and it didn’t feel good either.” Icarus bent down and reached inside Benny’s shoulder to grab the bullet. “Thank you, I owe you one...that is how humans… _ mortals _ say it…right, Dean?” Dean took a step towards Icarus “Alright you listen here you demonic son of a bitch.” I stood up and spread my wings my back to Icarus, pulling him behind me. 

“Dean…” I spun around only to see Castiel’s blue eye staring at Dean “Cas, what the hell is goin’ on with you?” Castiel looked down at me “Are you okay?” I nodded my head and gazed up at him “Are  _ you _ okay? The last I saw of you two you were both surrounded.” Castiel nodded, “‘We were surrounded, yes.” Castiel turned around when Death cleared his throat “Hello Castiel, I hope you have given up on playing God? Or do you still want to kickbox like they tried to get us to do last time?” Cas shook his head “No, I’d rather not.”

“Death… can you get him out, please?” Death seemed to contemplate the idea for a moment “I could get him out… but do you think it’s safe to bring him out?”I glanced from Castiel to Death “Consider this for a moment, he is half demon now Heather, not by possession but by his broken mind. He isn’t acting like God anymore, but are you sure he won’t do it again? It also seems that Icarus is on a bit of a warpath against Dean.” Benny slowly stood up “To be fair he did try to shoot her. That and she has her own score to settle with him, right darlin’?”

“Now just hold on, since when do you have a score to settle with me? I mean come on we just met.” I raised my wings in annoyance “It’s not over you shooting me Dean, it’s over Cas. You’re part of the reason that he is like this.” Dean looked hurt, “What? Cas come on man… I didn’t have anything to do with your condition, did I?” Castiel stared at Dean in a way that only could be explained as an unspoken conversation. “Cas… come on… whatever it was that caused it I didn’t mean it, honest.” There was a low growl that came from Icarus as he resurfaced “Didn’t you though? You seemed pretty sincere when you told him that...what was it you said...ah yes! ‘Nobody cares that you’re broken, Cas. Clean up your mess.’ That is how you said it, right?”

A chuckle came from Icarus as he reached an arm around my waist and pulled me into his chest. His skin was superheated as usual “I will make you pay for trying to hurt her. After all, she is my sweetheart, aren’t you?” His black eyes shined down at me, “And I will find a way out, with or without Death’s help, I promise you that. And when I get out, there isn’t a force alive or dead that will keep me away from you. Castiel may have claimed your soul, but your mind and body… that belongs to me, sweetheart.” He leaned down and kissed me, and I threaded my fingers through his hair. 

A purr came from Icarus’ throat as he pulled me into his chest and wrapped his arms around me. “Hm, so you do like me after all, don’t you?” Death cleared his throat “You know, if you really think that you can get out without my help, then I think I will…” I pushed Icarus back, “Death, please, please help me get him out, I’ll do anything, just please?” Death turned to me, “Anything? Really Heather, because I doubt that. However, I will propose something to you. If I bring him out, you will be responsible for him, if he does anything that I don’t like, I will come for you, and I will reap you, am I understood?”

I nodded my head, but Castiel stood in front of me and pulled me behind him “No.” I looked up shocked, “Cas, come on this is our only option of....” “I said no, Heather. Because of my condition, I could lose control, and I will not let you take the fall because of something that I did.” I sighed, “I can handle Icarus, Castiel.” He quickly spun around to look at me “Are you sure about that? Because I can barely handle him, Heather, I’m an Angel, and I can barely handle the demon myself, Icarus is strong Heather, very strong, how do you think he gets through so easily? Even when I don’t let him out he claws his way out, he isn’t a regular demon, Heather.” 

“Is there a way to split you two apart? You know separate you or something?” Death hummed “Now that is the first smart thing I think I’ve ever heard you say, Dean. That would make it easier to bring him out I think...but someone would have to go back in and absorb the demon soul.” Sam suddenly stood up, “Wait, Cas, without your grace, you’re basically human, right?” Castiel nodded, “Yes, I suppose so.” “Alright, then we just take your grace away and give it back when you come through. Easy.” I cleared my throat, “Okay, that solves the angel part, but what about Icarus, how is he supposed to get through?”

“We cure him.” Everyone turned to face Sam as he spoke: “We what?” Benny sounded just as confused as I felt. “Sam I don’t think that’s a good idea, it could kill Cas.” I felt my wings flinch slightly at what just left Dean’s mouth “Plus we don’t even know if that will work I mean…” “Do it.” I looked over my shoulder and faced Castiel “Cas…it could kill you, I don’t think…” “This isn’t up to you, Heather, do you not remember our conversation? I know you do, so I know that you remember what I said about what I feared most. This is my decision, and I chose this.” I rolled my eyes, “So I don’t suppose you are going to ask Icarus about it then?” Castiel locked eyes with me, “No.”

The air became thick with tension, and I tucked my wings tight against my back “So anyone gonna tell me just how we are supposed to cure a demon?” Castiel was still staring at me with a stern and silent gaze, similar to the one he had given Dean earlier. “We inject human blood into him, the only problem is that we have to be on Hallowed ground to do it.” I scoffed, “I’ve got just the place for you, then.”


	11. To Save An Angelic Devil

I finally turned away from Castiel and flared my wings out in my annoyance “The cave he is in, no other creature has set foot in there besides Benny and me. The water is as clear as crystal, which means it hadn’t been touched until I touched it. Hell, the whole cave was the only peaceful place there.” Sam and Dean looked over to Death “Okay, so now that we have a plan, are you gonna help us out?” Death paced back and forth for a few moments “Sam, I think you forget a step in your whole curing plan? The step with the human blood?”

“The person whose blood we use has to confess their sins, to a priest.” I turned back around to Castiel, “What about to an Angel?” “I’m sensing you are angry with me.” Castiel spoke evenly, and I crossed my arms, putting most of my weight on my right leg “Yeah, you picked that up, huh?” Dean cleared his throat “Guys, are we doin’ this or not?” I huffed, “Yes, but where are we going to find a priest?” Castiel sighed, “You won’t have to. Heather, since I claimed your soul, you are clean.” I heard a bottle, shatter, “You did what?” Dean sounded very accusing, “You mean you made a claim on her soul, Cas?”

“I did, yes. Why do you think some of the feathers are black instead of metallic in color like the rest of them? That is my mark; that is my claim.” “Wait, so you mean to tell me, that no matter what she does, she gets a free ride upstairs?” Dean walked over to Cas and stared at him. Castiel let out a breath through his nose “Yes, Dean, that is exactly what I ‘mean to tell you.’” Dean clenched his jaw “What about Sam and me, huh? Didn’t think that was a good deal for us?” A growl came from Castiel’s chest, and I jumped in between them as Icarus surfaced.

“You know, Dean, I’m getting bored with this conversation, and I’d like to… oh, I don’t know… get out?” Dean shoved past me “Oh you’re gonna get out all right, you’re gonna get out of Cas and go back to the pit, that is the only out you are getting you demonic son of a bitch.” A rumble escaped Icarus “We will see about that, won’t we Dean. Send me downstairs, and I’ll claw back up, after all, I do have a dangerous connection to someone.” I groaned, “Guys, can we tone down the testosterone levels, please?” Icarus looked over to me “I don’t remember hearing you complain about my testosterone levels earlier, sweetheart. It was the exact opposite if I remember it correctly.”

I swallowed hard as I felt awkwardness fill the room “Dude that’s just gross.” Dean made a face and turned away from us before returning to his original position beside Sam. “Let's just get this over with okay, the sooner we get rid of the demon inside Cas the better.” I shot Icarus a concerned look and he purred “Don’t you worry sweetheart. I’ll find my way back to you, I promise, oh and by the way, keep a hold of my jacket for me, cause when I claw back up I’ll be wanting it back, okay?” I nodded my head and turned to look at Death. “I will open the portal for you, you will have forty-eight hours to get in and get out, no more, understand?”

Everyone nodded, and Death gave a wave of his hand, and a portal appeared in the center of the room. Suddenly Death was dangling something in front of my face. It was a small ornate cylindrical container with a strange symbol on it, and I gently plucked it from his hand. “What is this?” I turned the vial over in my hand a few times “It is a container meant to hold Angel Grace, this one is made specifically for Castiel’s, the strange little symbol on it is the Enochian letter for your letter C.” I looped the chain that fastened onto the container around my neck. “It’s beautiful, where did you find it?” Death laughed humorlessly “Oh child I didn’t find it; I made it, I had originally planned to use it against Castiel when he was proclaiming to be God, you know to, how do you humans say it? Knock him down a few pegs?”

I examined it further until Dean caught my attention by clearing his throat. He was standing by the portal a green duffle-bag in hand “Are you coming; if you haven’t noticed the clock is ticking and you are the only one besides Benny who knows where this cave is, and I’m not dragging him back into Purgatory.” I turned around to face Icarus, and he gave me a wink “See you on the other side, Sweetheart, don’t keep me waiting too long?” I nodded as I watched as his projection fade, and I turned back to Dean, “Okay, let’s do this.” He nodded his head and stepped through the portal, and I followed him in after giving Death a thank you.

When we stepped through the portal, everything was eerily quiet, and I became tense. I felt my wings tingle a little, the energy from where Castiel had fought off all those monsters electrifying the air. “Come on it's this way, the cave I mean.” I started walking towards the sound of the river, knowing if I could find it, then I could follow it back to the cave. The closer I got to the cave, the more my wings tingled and the stronger the electricity in the air felt “Hey, how do you know where you are going? I mean take it from one who has been in here before, everything looks the same here so how?” 

I sighed and kept walking, “Because I can feel it okay? There is an energy that Castiel gives off, and it's...electric almost.” I started feeling extreme uneasiness as we came to the entrance of the cave “He’s in there, be careful and watch your step, those first few steps are a bit tricky.” I entered first and led them into the cave, but something didn’t feel right, the energy was wrong… it didn’t feel peaceful in here anymore. “Icarus?  Castiel? Anyone in here?” It was so quiet, not a calm quiet, more like an eerie quiet.

“So you must be the little human he keeps talking about, what a surprise, Heather, right?” I unsheathed my ax and gripped it tightly as I spun around my eyes, landing on something that didn’t make sense. It was a featureless human-shaped swirling mass of what looked like some black liquid. “What the hell…” I backed up as Sam and Dean entered the cave “Oh and you’ve brought the Winchesters! Oh, what fun!” I recognized that type of attitude immediately, “Icarus?” Laughter came from the figure standing in front of me, “I could be...here, maybe this will make it easier on you.”

I stood in shock as the creature took the form of Icarus right in front of me “Oh, he wasn’t joking, he does have a strong bond with you, dangerously strong.” I heard a pained groan come from somewhere in the cave, and I felt my heart sink. “What have you done, what are you?” The Icarus look-a-like smiled at me, “Where do you think your little Icarus came from, Heather. All that corruption in Castiel’s being, hm?” The answer smacked me in the face “Leviathan.” The creature grinned “See you are smart, so now I wonder… what exactly makes you so special, hm?”

I was scared, I had never seen anything like this, and I drew Icarus’ jacket close around me for comfort. “What have you done to them?” Another pained sound, this time a scream and I felt my wings give an almost electric jolt. “Oh, just a little something we Leviathans do so we can pass the time. He killed us, so we are back here again, it gets quite boring here, you understand?” I heard a scoff behind me as Dean stepped up beside me, “So what you are torturing them to get your rocks off?” 

The Leviathan hummed in response “Just a little revenge, I mean I think we deserve a little bit of fun since we are all going to starve in this place  _ again _ , not before leaving our mark on your little Angel friend of course. Him being half Demon and all now, we were surprised at first, then we noticed the snarky attitude from his… darker half and we immediately knew it was our corruption that caused it.” The Leviathan snapped his fingers, and two more came from further in the cave dragging Castiel with them.

“Cas?” Dean called out as the Angel was thrown to the ground in front of our feet; he looked horrible. I quickly knelt by his side and gently pulled him into my arms. He was shaking from either pain or exhaustion from the torture though I couldn’t tell which. “He’s too weak to answer you right now, which gives him only one choice. He either siphons off some energy from Heather’s soul, or he dies.” I felt anger rise in my chest “You’re a sick bastard, you know that?” Another bout of laughter, “Oh yes, dear, I am very well aware.” He strode over towards Castiel and reached out to grab him. I didn’t think just acted as I stood to my feet and snapped open my wings and brought it down on the Leviathan’s arm, severing it from the elbow.

The black liquid flowed from the wound and the piece of the severed arm that now lay on the ground. “Oh, now, I see. No wonder the Angel kept calling out for you, you’re his chosen.” A weak growl came from my feet “Don’t… you… dare… touch… her.” Castiel was struggling to breathe, so the fact that a growl and a sentence came from him was shocking. Dean was by Castiel’s side in seconds “Cas, hey, don’t talk right now. We will handle this okay, you rest.”

Sam stooped down to pick Castiel up only to drag out another choked cry from him. “Sam, stop!” Sam immediately backed away his hands up in confusion, “Don’t move him.” Dean pulled out a large bottle filled with something I didn’t recognize “Oh yes Sammy, don’t hurt your precious Angel...or whatever he is now... Or else you might hurt him further.” The Leviathan was suddenly screaming and appeared to be burning “Take that you freaky son of a bitch!” 

Dean moved forward and sliced the creatures head off with his Purgatory Blade as Sam did the same to the other two Leviathans in the room. Castiel groaned, and I fell back to his side again, gently placing his head in my lap. “Shh shh don’t move.” I gently stroked his hair, “Please don’t move…” Sam knelt by my side “Heather we need to move him...we need to get him back to the bunker, he’ll be safer there I promise. “We can’t get him through that portal Sam, he isn’t human, we can’t get him through it.”

“She’s right Sammy, plus he isn’t strong enough even if he was able to get through, the journey back to the portal alone…” I interrupted Sam and Dean’s conversation, “That thing said that if Cas were to pull some energy from my soul, he should be fine, right?” Dean nodded his head and went to speak when Castiel interrupted him “No… I won’t… do that… not to… her.” I looked down at him only to see him staring up at me with his bright blue eye “Not… to you.”

“Dammit Cas, you’re gonna die if you don’t.” Dean sounded angry at him, “I said… no Dean… I… I won’t…” Castiel began to cough before finishing his thought, “I won’t… put her through… that pain… I can’t.” I saw a slight flicker in his abyssal eye as his blue eye slowly turned black before quickly flashing back to blue. “You’re fighting him, aren’t you?” Castiel gently nodded his head “I’m... weaker now… and… he knows… it.” The abyssal eye gleamed almost mischievously. “So what, they hurt you but not your dark side? How is that even possible?” Castiel coughed as he answered Dean’s question “My Angel Blade… Icarus is… immune to it somehow.”

I suddenly felt a presence in my mind, and I went stiff  _ “Don’t be afraid sweetheart, it’s just me.”  _ I relaxed only slightly  _ “Tell that Angel either he borrows some of that soul-power or I will make him do it.”  _ I cleared my throat catching everyone's attention “Cas, Icarus says if you don’t take some of my energy, he will make you do it. “Cas gave me an apologetic look. “It will... hurt you… Heather… Please… don’t make… me… do this.” 

I took a deep breath before answering him, “I don’t care Cas, you need to heal before we can do anything to get you out of here. I told you I was going to get you out, and that is what I aim to do, so do it.” Castiel closed his eyes in defeat as he slowly reached his hand up to just below my ribcage. “I’m… so sorry… Heather.” Before I could answer him, I felt a searing hot pain race through my body, and I screamed before everything went black.


	12. Cures & Restoration

I awoke with a sharp gasp only to curse a second after “Shit.” My chest felt like it was on fire. I went to sit up only to be held down by strong arms “Woah Woah hey, not so fast Heather, take it easy.” I groaned as I fell back against something warm and soft, that’s when  I realized I was back in the bedroom of Castiel’s cave. “Where is Cas? Is he okay?” I felt the edge of the bed shift as Sam sat down on it “He’s fine, he is resting right now. He blacked out a little bit after you did, it was weird, we have seen him touch souls before, but we have never seen him do that before.”

“Yeah it was weird, he didn’t just pass out, he convulsed, it gave us a scare for a minute.” I quickly sat up at Dean’s statement “He did what? Sam told me he was fine!” Dean pushed me back down “He is fine, relax! Jeez, kid, your voice echoes in here be quieter.” There was a growl from the door that Dean had just been standing in “Uh, Dean… you might want to let Heather up.” I turned and saw Icarus standing in the doorway, and his gaze was murderous as he glared at the back of Dean’s head. “Dean, move slow, okay?”

Dean ignored me and instead whirled around and aimed a gun right at Icarus and I froze. Icarus chuckled “Come on now Dean, you have to know a gun isn’t gonna do much to me. Besides…” Icarus was suddenly gone from the doorway, and I jumped when I heard his voice behind me “I’m faster than you.” Icarus wrapped his arms around me and gently pulled me into his chest while his back was against the headboard of the bed. “You okay, Sweetheart?” His embrace was superheated, and it helped with my aching muscles in my chest and body, and I found myself sinking into his touch. “Possessive much?” Icarus’ eyes flicked up to Sam, “Very much, Sam, very much.”

“Oh, I can not wait to get rid of you.” Dean was angry, and Icarus pulled me closer to him. Icarus rolled his eyes “Then why don’t you. Honestly, I’m getting tired of your broken record response, Dean.” Dean reached down and revealed eight syringes full of what looked like blood “That’s what these are for, smartass.” I saw the needles, and my heart skipped “Dean…” He looked at me, “Don’t worry kid, we did it while you were asleep.” I heard Icarus groan, and I felt him shake a little, “Seems your Angel is awake, awake and concerned.”

“Don’t fight him Icarus. You know what happened last time you tried.” He nodded his head, “Yeah yeah, I know, I’ll see you again, sweetheart.” He winked at me before his black eye gave way to that ice blue of Castiel. His body temperature cooled down slightly going from superheated to just warm. “Cas?” Dean was the first to speak up, and Castiel looked up at him “Hello, Dean. How much longer do you all have before that portal closes?” Dean sighed, “Right to it then? We have long enough to get this cure in you and get you out of here. Your grace will have to come after though, we need you to keep your dark side in check so that he won’t cause us any issues.”

Castiel nodded his head before looking down at me “Heather, how are you feeling, I’m sorry about the pain, I’m sure it was immense.” He laid a hand just below my ribs, and I felt a comforting warmth spread through my body. I noticed that all my aches and pains were gone and I glanced up at him. “Thanks, Cas, and it’s okay, I’d do it again if I had to.” Dean cleared his throat “Speaking of which, why were you convulsing Cas? What did you take in too much juice at once or something?” Castiel shook his head gently “No, her soul just has that much power, it’s extreme, I haven’t felt one that strong since…” He trailed off and stared off into the distance at something we couldn’t see.

“Since what Cas?” It was Sam who spoke up this time “I don’t remember because I haven’t. I haven’t felt one this strong before.” I looked at him, confused, “What do you mean?” Cas shook his head seeming just as confused “I’m, not sure. I’ve heard stories of Angel’s being created to watch over a certain charge. You call it Guardian Angels. However, I thought that was all stories.” Dean scoffed “So what you mean the whole ‘angel’s are watching over us’ crap is true?” Castiel tilted his head, “That is what I just said, why are you repeating it?” Dean let out a humorless laugh, “Well, mine is doing a bang-up job.” 

“Michael was your Guardian, Dean.” Dean snapped his head up to Castiel. “You’re joking.” Castiel shook his head “No, I’m not Dean.” Dean scoffed “Then why the hell didn’t he pull me out of the pit?” Castiel sighed, “I… I don’t know, probably because he didn’t want to get his hands dirty when an Angel of lesser standing could have done it.” Dean frowned “You’re more of an Angel than that self-righteous dick ever was Cas. Hell, I didn’t see God bring him back from the dead as he has done for you. Brought you back as a Seraph of all things too.”

“Yes, and look at what I’ve done with it…” I put my hand on Castiel’s face and gently turned his head to look at me. “Don’t talk like that Cas. You did what you thought was the right thing to do. You made a mistake, that’s all. It’s okay to make mistakes. You learned from yours Cas, don’t let it eat you up like this, okay?” He closed his eyes and sighed, nodding his head. “Okay, good.” Dean rolled his eyes “Okay, you two, can we get this demon curing thing over with, I want to get home.” 

Castiel nodded and sat up, straighter gently pushing me away from him. “Heather, you should leave, this is not going to be something that you want to witness.” I shook my head, ready to protest when Sam gently grabbed my arm “He’s right Heather, you don’t want to be in here when we do this… It's not pretty.” I shook my head again “I don’t want them to be alone, either one of them.” Sam gently reached down and picked me up, holding me against his chest. 

“He won’t be, Dean will be in here the whole time. If it makes you feel any better Cas won’t be hurt during this. It’s just his corrupted half we are getting rid of.” I looked up at Sam “He has a name, Sam.” “He’s a Demon, Heather. Nothing good ever comes from those bastards; trust me.” Dean spoke as he stood up, “Oh and one other thing,  _ Icarus _ .” Dean’s voice was full of malice and hate. “You ain’t goin’ anywhere. There’s a devil’s trap above your head so good luck. I’m sorry Cas, but we had to clear all the bases here buddy.” Dean turned around and lit a match before letting it fall to the ground. 

A large ring of fire encircled the bed, and I gasped. “Holy oil, you know, just in case he tries to use your Angel power to get out.” Castiel nodded his head gently “I understand Dean.” Castiel turned to look at me, and I saw his abyssal eye shimmer before I felt Icarus in my mind again.  _ “It’s all right Sweetheart. I’ll come back, don’t you worry.”  _ I took a deep breath and nodded at Castiel, who nodded in return. “Okay Sam, you take Heather back out to where all that water is, I’ll come to get you in eight hours or so.” Sam nodded his head and turned, carrying me out the door closing it behind him.

The second that we left and started walking through the rock hallway I heard Dean start talking to Icarus. “All right you son of a bitch, let’s get started.” Not a second later and I listened to a sound I never wanted to hear again. I heard a scream mixed with a roar, and I curled tighter into Sam’s arms as we walked down the long hallway. “So, Heather, I have a question for you if you don’t mind?” I took a deep breath “No, I don’t mind, what is it, Sam?” We made it back out to the central area of the cave, and he set me down near the water before he sat down next to me.

“Why did you take a liking to him, Icarus I mean?” I shrugged my shoulders “Honestly; I don’t know, he just kinda piqued my interest, I guess.” Sam let out a short laugh “Piqued your interest? How?” I sighed and stuck my hand in the water letting the coolness and stillness of it calm me. “He was kinda funny, I guess. A total smartass, don’t get me wrong but… He was nice to me, for the most part. Plus the whole look kinda helped too, I mean come on Sam, you can’t tell me that Castiel isn’t good looking.”

Sam let out a genuine laugh, “Yeah, I can’t tell you he isn’t.” I shook my head “Don’t get me wrong, Cas is sweet, gentle, and kind. However, Icarus has something that Cas seemed to be missing. That and I felt bad for him, the story Cas told me about how he got to be that way… it broke my heart Sam… he was so… broken.”

 Sam nodded his head “So let me guess, you’re the type of girl that thinks she can turn bad into good if she’s around them enough right? Fix all their problems?” I laughed dryly, “Yeah, basically, I’ve always been like that, though.” I drew Icarus’ jacket around myself “He just seemed powerful, confident, things that I’m not, you know?” Sam sighed and nodded his head “Yeah, I get it. I had a fling with a Demon once too. Her name was Ruby. She bit me in the ass though once she got what she wanted.”

My head snapped up to look at Sam “Wait, are you serious?” He nodded, “Yeah, very serious. Which is why I’m telling you to let us do this Heather, demons are all the same. They trick you into giving them what they want then they turn on you.” I stared down at the water, “But why me then? I’m no that special Sam. I mean besides my wings, I’m just a human, normal human being with depression and anxiety problems. Nothing special about that.” Sam scoffed “Well obviously Cas doesn’t agree with that, you heard what he said about your soul and how he was made for you. You are special to him. You are special to an Angel Heather, an Angel.”

I sighed in frustration, “Yeah and a Demon too Sam.” Just as I spoke, I heard another scream, and I jumped to my feet, my wings reaching their full span in a single flap. “Dammit, I can’t take that anymore, Sam.” I started to head back toward the hallway when Sam grabbed my arm and pulled me back. “Heather, don’t…” “He’s killing him, Sam!” Sam pulled me into him and held me tight against him “No, he’s not, please just relax.” I snapped.

“Relax? Relax? Are you kidding me, Sam?” I used what strength I had in my arms to try to push him away. “He’s hurting him, and he doesn’t even care!” My wings flared above my head in anger, the dim light of the cave glinting off of the razor-sharp feathers. Sam let go and backed away with his hands up. “Okay okay, so what do you want? You want me to go in there and do it instead of Dean?” I shook my head, “No.” I turned swiftly on my heel and stormed down the hallway and into the room where the cries were coming from.

“Heather wait you don’t want to…” I ignored Sam and stormed into the room only to stop dead in my tracks at the sight of Castiel. He was curled up on the bed shaking so badly I would damn near call it convulsing. “...go in there and see...dammit.” Dean spun on his heel, empty syringe in his hand as he stared at me. “What the hell, Sam? I thought we all agreed she was gonna wait out in the main part of the cave.” I stormed up to the edge of the flaming circle surrounding Dean and the bed that Castiel was laying on and I glared at Dean.

“Stop it, Dean.” He rolled his eyes, “Come on, Heather, we don’t have time for…” I cut him off abruptly “You’re killing him, Dean! Just look at him!” Cas looked up at me in a pleading manner his abyssal eye shining weakly. “Heather… you… shouldn’t...shouldn’t be here.” I saw his blue eye turn black, and the look was terror and pain all mixed into one emotion that I never wanted to see again. 

“Dammit, kid do you want to get Cas out of here or not?” I reached my hand out over the flames “Give me the rest of them.” Dean rolled his eyes and sat on the edge of the bed. “You know what I’m not having this conversation with you. Sam get her out of here so I can get this done.” Sam took a step towards me, and I gave my wings a strong flap clearing the ring of fire at my feet before stepping up to Dean. “You’re right. We aren’t having this conversation. Now give me those and let  _ me _ finish this and  _ you  _ go sit outside.”

Dean rolled his eyes and stood up, handing me the rest of the syringes “Fine, but don’t come out crying telling me you couldn’t do it once he starts thrashing.” He stormed out of the room and down the hall. “Heather, do you want me to stay in here with you?” Sam’s voice was soft when he spoke, and I gently shook my head “No, Sam, but thank you, I’ll be fine. Oh and thank you, for our talk outside, I wish Dean was as nice.” Sam chuckled “He is Heather, honest, he gets this way when he’s going through things. He doesn’t talk about it kinda keeps it to himself, you know?”

I nodded, “Yeah, I get it, guess we have that in common too. Just go out there and get him to calm down and tell him I’m sorry for yelling and tell him I tend to bottle things up too.” Sam nodded and left the room, closing the door behind him gently. “Heather...please...you don’t have to…” I turned to face Castiel who looked at me with concern in his blue eye. I shuffled up to the head of the bed and gently pulled Castiel’s shaking form against me and held him. “I know I don’t have to Cas, but I’m going to.”

“You know… this is one thing…. I never understood about humans… they put themselves through pain for others…. When they don’t have to, why is that?” Icarus’ voice caught me off guard. It wasn’t snarky like it usually was, it sounded genuinely curious. “That is a good question. I guess it's because we want to do everything we can to make sure someone we care about doesn’t get hurt. We would rather put that weight on ourselves than to have them deal with it, whether it be physical, or emotional.”

“Well, I think… it's nuts and… extremely stupid… but what do I know about feelings?” I laughed a little “Yeah, I guess you could say it is stupid, but that is what a soul does to a person, you know?” I gently ran my fingers through their hair, and I heard a purr “You like doing that, don’t you, sweetheart?” I hummed a little and nodded my head. “Yeah, it’s soft and thick, don’t judge me.” I heard him take a shuddering breath, “Don’t worry, wasn’t planning on it. So… you gonna finish this or what?”

I gripped one of the syringes that hadn’t been used, and I looked down into Icarus’ dark eyes. “I don’t want to.” I heard him sigh, “I know, but if you want to get us out of here, then you are going to have to.” I shook my head and looked down, getting lost in my head. “Heather.” I felt a hand come up to lift my head only to meet Castiel’s blue eye. “It’s okay. We need to do this, please.” I chuckled humorlessly, “Well, I guess it’s a good thing that I’m made of scar tissue then, huh?”

Castiel tilted his head, “I don’t understand?” I sighed, “It’s from a song, Cas.” His eye turned from blue to black as Icarus surfaced again. “You know I’ve never really heard music before, sing it for me?” I shook my head “What is it with you two and wanting sad songs sung to you?” He smiled a little “From what Castiel has told me, the sad ones are the best ones.” I sighed, “You know Icarus, I liked you better when you were more snarky.” He chuckled, “I haven’t lost that touch just yet sweetheart, don’t you worry.” I took a shaky breath and held back my tears “God this sucks, fine, you want me to be depressing, fine. If I cry, it's on you.” I cleared my throat and began to sing for Icarus.

 

_What have I gone and fucked up again this time?_

_How did I become my own demise?_

_All these twisted little parts of me,_

_Afraid of losing everything._

_So I, I pulled the trigger, and I fired away._

_I pulled the trigger, and I fired away._

 

Icarus gently took my hand and opened it, grabbing the syringe out of my grasp before sticking the needle into his arm and pushing the blood into his system. He groaned and curled up in my lap shuddering. 

 

_Can you still hear my voice from afar?_

_Your dead flowers are still hanging on my walls._

_I felt God when you were near._

_For once, everything seemed so clear._

_Until you_

_Pulled the trigger and you fired away._

_You pulled the trigger, and you fired away._

 

The shuddering stopped, and he laid there, breathing deeply, his eyes shut tight as he rode out the pain. He grabbed another syringe and brought it to his arm again, repeating the process.

 

_The shot you took was overdue._

_It’s a good thing I am made of scar tissue._

 

“You know… when this is over… and I get out of here… I am seriously going to… kick that Winchester’s ass.” I didn’t speak when I heard it was becoming harder for Icarus to breathe correctly because I knew if I did, I would tell him to stop.

_You pulled the trigger, and you fired away._

_Won’t you lay your guns down?_

 

Another syringe, another dose another shuddering, convulsing fit. Over and over until he was down to the last one. “Don’t… tell them… I’m… doing… this.” He gripped onto his leather jacket that was around my shoulders and used one of my wings to slice his wrist gently. Black blood trickled onto the coat, and he looked me in the eyes. “When… when you… get topside… go… bury this… somewhere… I’ll come… back… for it… for… for you… I promise.” A tear slipped down my cheek, and he reached up and wiped it away gently. “I’ll… see you… on… the other… side… Sweetheart.”

 

_Won’t you please lay your gun down?_

_Won’t you lay your gun down?_

_Oh, lay your gun down._

_Won’t you lay your gun down?_

_Won’t you lay your gun down?_

 

He put the last syringe of blood into his system, and I held his form as he shook. When he finally stopped shaking and went limp, I stroked his hair gently and let the tears fall freely. “I will I promise, I’m so sorry.” I felt something shift under his jacket sleeve shift, and I jerked only to find that bit of blood had somehow become animated. It squirmed for a bit before circling my wrist once. “Well this isn’t symbiotic at all, is it?” It did another circle around my wrist before slithering up the jacket sleeve and disappearing.

“You sly devil…” I gently stood up and lay Castiel’s head gently back down as I walked out of the door and down the hall. When I entered the room in the central part of the cave, the two brothers looked up at me. Sam got to his feet quickly and came over and hugged me, “Are you okay?” I shook my head, and I felt the damn break as tears flowed freely from my eyes as my body shook and trembled. Sam sighed and picked me up, holding me tightly against his chest.

“I’ll go check on Cas,” Dean spoke quietly as he got to his feet and shuffled back to the bedroom. Sam sat me down near the water again, “Hey, hey, look at me.” I shook my head and buried my face deeper into him. “Heather?” I slowly looked up only to see Castiel standing a few feet behind Sam, both his eyes were now a bright blue, and I nearly choked. “She’s not taking this very well Cas.” When I peeked back up at him, I realized his attire had changed drastically. He had lost the black jeans and was back into his tan-colored trench coat that I had seen in the picture.

He held out his arms and motioned for Sam to hand me over to him. Sam slowly stood up and gently placed me in Castiel’s arms. I trembled at Castiel’s next words, “I heard you singing to him, that was very sweet of you, Heather.” I snuggled deeper into him, and he sighed. “I know you’re hurting, but we still have another step to finish Heather.” I choked back a sob “I can’t… I can’t cause any more pain, Cas… not to you too.” He gently lifted my head “It won’t hurt me, I promise.”

He handed me his Angel Blade, and I gently took it from him. “Cut right here, it will be okay I promise, just make sure that container is open.” I slowly nodded and opened the container before making a small shallow cut along his throat. I gasped as a bright light shone through the cut before leaving it. A flow of light blue energy flowed from Castiel into the container. Once all of it was safely inside, he took his hand and closed it looking into my eyes as he did so. “See, didn’t hurt.” I held up the small container looking at the bright swirling light inside.

“It’s beautiful, Castiel your grace is beautiful.” He gently grasped the container in his hand and pressed it gently against my chest. My heart sped up a notch or two, and Castiel noticed because his bright blue eyes flicked up to mine, and he held me with his intense gaze. It wasn’t uncomfortable; it was just a peaceful gaze like he was looking into my eyes for the first time. “You are beautiful, Heather. Though I can see the hurt in your eyes, why?” I broke my gaze away from his as I looked to the floor “It’s about Icarus… isn’t it?” I swallowed and slightly nodded, and Castiel leaned down and kissed the top of my head gently. I felt his breath tickle my hair slightly, and I closed my eyes, it was a comforting feeling.

“Don’t be sad, Heather, I will help you through this time of pain.” I heard someone clear their throat and I looked over to see Dean standing there awkwardly as he looked between Castiel and myself. “Can we go now, I’m exhausted and would like to have my bed back if you two don’t mind?” I nodded and went to push myself gently away from Castiel, but he just held me tighter. “Cas?” I flicked my gaze back to him, “I will help you, Heather, I promise.” Something flickered in his eyes, and something told me that he knew what Icarus had planned.

My thoughts were proven correct when he gently played with the jacket sleeve and circled my wrist with one finger. If would have been a random act, I would have found it strange, but at that moment I understood, and I nodded my head. “Thanks, Cas, now come on, let’s get you home.” He gently set me back onto my feet and grabbed his Angel Blade before turning to Sam and Dean. “All right let’s get movin’.” Dean was the first one out of the cave, and we all followed in behind him. 

Castiel stayed right at my back the whole way back towards the portal, close enough that we weren’t touching, but I could feel him there. “Am I making you uncomfortable? Being in what Dean calls ‘personal space?’ I know you typically don’t like this kind of proximity, which is why I’m asking.” I glanced over my shoulder at him “No, and how did you know that?” He looked away briefly as if he was deciding whether or not to tell me his answer. “When I touched your soul, I got some of your memories and emotions. So I know why you don’t like it, but you seem to be comfortable with me doing it, why?”

My answer was simple and sincere “Because I trust you, that and your energy is soothing for me.” He walked closer until he was directly beside me, keeping in stride with me. “I’m glad you do, I feel as though Sam and Dean don’t though.” I stopped in my tracks and grabbed onto his trench coat sleeve, stopping his movement. “Cas, what was one of the first things I told you about Sam and Dean?” Castiel looked down like a reprimanded puppy “To not worry about what they think about me.” I gently tilted his head up to look at me “Exactly, and thank you… for helping me with Icarus.”

I felt a slithering sensation go up to my back and in between my wings and I shivered a little. Cas noticed and tilted his head at me “He’s uh… messing with me, he knows we are talking about him. “There was a word you said earlier, Symbiote, what does that mean?” I laughed and shook my head “Well, I know what we are doing when we get you home. You and I are going to watch Venom. Then you will know what I mean.” Cas tilted his head even more, and I let out a laugh, “Don’t worry Cas, I think you will like it. Now come on, we need to catch up to the others.”

We made it back to Sam and Dean in no time and watched as the portal pulsed but seemed to grow smaller each time. “If we are gonna do this we are gonna need to do this now. Cas you go in first Heather you go after him, Sam and I will be right behind you.” I nodded, and Cas grabbed my hand, pulling me through the portal with him. Dean and Sam came through just after we did and the portal disappeared. “Cuttin’ it a little close, don’t you think there Darlin’? Thought you guys weren’t gonna come back for a minute there.” I saw Benny, and I instantly ran into his arms clinging onto him, “Woah easy there Darlin’ what happened?”

“She's had a rough go of things Benny.” I was surprised when I heard Dean speak, “She needs rest and comfort more than the rest of us, I think.” Benny nodded and picked me up, “Got it. You can stay with me tonight then Darlin’. Tell me everything that happened okay?” I nodded and reached out for Castiel grabbing his sleeve “You are coming too, right?” He smiled and nodded, “Of course, I do have to get my grace back at some point, sooner rather than later if you don’t mind.” 

Castiel followed Benny as he carried me into one of the many bedrooms within the Bunker. He set me down on the bed, and Castiel sat beside me and gently took the container away from me and opened it. He opened his mouth and allowed the grace to reenter his body, and I couldn’t help but stare at him. “That was probably the strangest thing I’ve ever seen.” A bright light filled the room, and I saw Castiel’s wings project astrally on the wall behind him as his eyes shone with a brilliant blue light. 

Castiel’s eyes locked onto my own, the light still emitting from them, and I felt my heart skip a beat. “Your soul is beautiful, Heather. Though it’s different from anything, I’ve ever seen before.” Castiel’s eyes roamed over my body, and he tilted his head “I didn’t realize it before. How broken you are.” The light faded away, and his eyes looked at me with sadness and remorse. “I should have come to you, protected you, I’m sorry.” I shook my head “Don’t worry about it. You had bigger issues to deal with Cas.” He looked down and took my hands into his own “I still am sorry, what you went through…”

“Hey, life happens Cas, it's okay.” He went quiet, so I decided to make conversation, a more light-hearted one hopefully. “You know that light that comes from your eyes. It matches your Grace.” His flicked back up to mine again and he tilted his head again. “Does it?” I nodded, “Yeah.” He smiled a little and turned me around so that when he pulled me against him, my back was resting against his chest. “You need to relax and get some sleep, Heather.” He slowly started slipping Icarus’ jacket off of my shoulders, and I tensed. “It’s okay, just relax, I will go and bury this myself while you sleep, okay?”

I nodded my head before slipping off my shoes and laying down on the bed. “Bury it, why?” I watched as the small bit of Icarus’ blood slithered out of the jacket and onto Benny’s arm “The hell is that?” I sat up and grabbed Benny’s arm, signaling for him to be quiet. I whispered to him just in case Sam, and Dean were nearby “When I was curing Icarus, he bled on the jacket and told me to go bury it. What you are looking at is what is left of him, his essence, I guess you could say.” Benny looked down at his arm where the animated blood was slowly moving up his sleeve to his shoulder. “You realize he ain’t a demon then, right?”

I looked at Benny, confused, “What do you mean?” Benny shook his head “Darlin’ Demon essence is smoke, this ain’t smoke. This is Leviathan, and if it ain’t full Leviathan, then it is at least half.” Castiel spoke up next “Then he must be half Leviathan and half Demon. We cured him like a Demon, and he can get into Heather’s head like one.” Benny looked up at Castiel “Right, but he stemmed from the corruption that the Levithan’s caused you, right?” Castiel nodded, “Demons are corruption, Benny.” Icarus’ blood moved from Benny over to me and circled my wrist before settling around it like a bracelet. 

“So he’s a demon stemmed from Leviathan corruption, do you know how dangerous that makes him Cas?” Castiel looked down, “I am aware of this danger, yes.” Benny shook his head and stared at Castiel in disbelief “Then why the hell are you tryin’ to bring him back?” Castiel looked up at me, “Because I told him I would help him, Benny, that’s why.” I gently placed my hand on the jacket and allowed Icarus’ blood to slither onto it. I looked at Castiel, who nodded before disappearing with the sound of flapping wings.

“This could be a big mistake you’re makin’ here, Darlin’. You sure about this?” I nodded my head, “You should have seen him, Benny, when I was curing him… it was awful.” Castiel came back a moment later and sat down on the edge of the bed like before “It is done.” I nodded and laid back down, “Benny, don’t tell Sam and Dean, okay?” He sighed but nodded his head as he laid down on my left side as Castiel laid down on my right. “Get some rest darlin’ you need it, hell we all need it.” Castiel reached over and touched my forehead with two fingers, and I felt a soothing energy course through me before I fell asleep.


	13. Icarus Rising

It had been a few months since the whole Purgatory incident, Sam and Dean had taken me in as a Hunter in training, and everything was running smoothly, that is until the nightmares started. They were about Icarus, every one of them, though I don’t think they were aimed towards me in particular? It was like he was trying to reach out to me, but whenever he did terrible things would happen in my dreams to turn them into nightmares. That’s when I decided to ask Castiel about them.

I happened to find him in the Bunker’s Library, reading a book “Picked up book reading Cas?” He looked up at me and our eyes locked, that was one thing that I would never get used to, his piercing gaze. “I have yes, what can I do for you, Heather?” I wandered over to the table and sat down next to him. “What can you tell me about nightmares, Cas?” He closed the book and set it down before turning in his chair so that he was facing me. “What kind of nightmares are they? What are they about?”

I took a deep breath and looked around to make sure neither Sam nor Dean was in earshot of our conversation. “Heather?” Castiel grabbed my attention, and when I looked back at him, his head was tilted to the side in concern. “They are about Icarus, Cas, I think he is trying to reach out to me through my dreams, but something is wrong.” Castiel sighed and stood up “When did you start having these nightmares, Heather?” I shrugged my shoulders “I don’t know, a few nights ago?” Castiel started pacing back and forth a little “Would you say about a week ago?” I watched him pace, and I began to become concerned, “Yeah, I guess, Cas what’s going on?”

“He is getting stronger. He could show up at any point.” I felt my heart skip a beat at hearing this. “Wait are you serious, you mean he could just pop up at any point?” Castiel nodded his head, “I believe so yes, he is a very powerful being Heather. But, I think I know where he is going to turn up if he is awake.” I watched him curiosity brimming in my mind as Castiel stopped pacing. “He is going to want to be as close to you as possible. You are where his strength comes from.” I stood up from my chair, “You’re kidding.” Castiel shook his head “I am not kidding, Heather. You named him, you gave him life in a sense, and then you bonded with him. You are the only thing he cares for, he will kill for you, over you, and to get to you.”

“You brought him back?” I jumped and spun around to see Dean come into the room, anger evident in his green eyes. “Dean, listen, I can-” “No, no, you aren’t going to explain anything, Heather.” He stormed over to the table, dropping his duffle bag onto it and starting to go through it. “Where is he?” I swallowed and looked over to Castiel for help “Dammit Heather, where is he?!” I jumped when he yelled, and I heard footsteps running down the hall towards the library. “Someone wanna tell me what the hell’s goin’ on in here.” Benny made it into the room first, and he looked in between Castiel, Dean, and I. “What’s with all the yellin’ Dean?” Dean pulled out his gun and cocked it “She brought Icarus back Benny, that’s what's going on.”

Benny sighed, “I know.” Dean spun on his heel “Excuse me? What do you mean, you know?” Benny came down the stairs, Dean watching him the whole time “I mean I knew about the plan to bring him back Dean. Course I wasn’t filled in on it till after you all came back, but yeah I knew.” Dean let out a humorless laugh, “Well, that’s just fantastic. I’m guessing you knew about it too, right, Cas?” Castiel looked down at the floor, refusing to meet Dean’s eyes. “I helped you get out of Purgatory, again, and this is what you do?” I gently grabbed Castiel’s hand and squeezed it, trying to reassure him. “You know Death was right; maybe we should have left you there.”

I felt anger rise in my chest “Dean! What the hell?!” Sam came into the room next looking like he had just gotten out of the shower. “Dean, maybe we should-” “No, Sam, not this time.” The look Dean was giving Castiel was chilling “Get out.” I felt Cas go rigid. “I can’t trust you anymore Cas, not this time.” I felt sadness rush through me that wasn’t my own. “Dean…” Castiel’s tone was sorrowful, almost pleading, “No, Cas; I don’t want to hear it. Get out.” I grabbed Castiel’s arm, getting his attention. When he looked at me, I shook my head at him before turning back to Dean. “It wasn’t Cas’ idea, Dean; it was mine. Let him stay, and I’ll go, I’ll leave, don’t make him leave.”

Dean sighed, “Heather, you don’t have to go.” I shook my head, “No, I do, I’ll be fine; I learned from the best, after all.” I was about to leave when Castiel grabbed my arm and spun me around, pulling me into his chest. “Cas…” He was staring down at me intently before he drew me in for a kiss. It was gentle, and when he pulled away, there was concern shining in his blue eyes “If you need anything...” I nodded my head, “I know Cas.” He sighed, “You find him, understand. He will protect you.” I nodded my head, and Castiel brought me in for a hug. “You ain’t plannin’ on leavin’ without tellin’ me goodbye are you Darlin’?” 

I went over to Benny and gave him a hug, “You stay out of trouble, you here?” I nodded before going over to Sam, who gave me a concerned look. “Thank you, Sam, for listening to me back in Purgatory, it means a lot.” He nodded his head and drew me into a hug as well before letting me go. “You have my number Heather if anything happens.” I smiled and rolled my eyes “Call you, I know.” 

When I got to Dean, he nodded at me before letting me leave. I went to my room and grabbed my things, shoving them into a duffle bag and heading out into the garage to find my car. Following Hunter tradition, Dean allowed took me car hunting for a classic. He had taken me to what was left of a place called “Singer’s Auto” He told me the story of a man named Bobby Singer who was like a father to both him and Sam. I wished I had met him before he passed away. He seemed like a fantastic guy.

**_::FLASHBACK::_ **

_ _ _ “Alright kid, I’m taking you car shopping, when we get there, pick out any car you want, okay?” Dean was currently taking me somewhere to find a car to call my own, and I was ecstatic. “Are you sure, Dean, I mean that’s a lot of money, a new car.” He laughed at me “Oh no, I’m not buying you a car kid. You are going to pick one out from the place I’m taking you, and I’m gonna fix it up for you, oh and word of advice, stay classic okay? Hunter tradition, plus they are easier to fix up if they break down than these computerized things they call cars now.” _

_ I nodded my head as we pulled into a junkyard with a sign reading “Singer Auto” hanging above the lot. It looked like it had been abandoned for a while, and I gave him a confused look. “This place belonged to someone who was like a father to Sam and me; his name was Bobby Singer. You would have liked him, I think, now come on, time to find you your Baby.” Dean stopped the car in the middle of the lot and got out going to the trunk and pulling out a toolbox. I hopped out behind him and started looking through the cars until I found something that I couldn’t believe. _

_ The second I laid eyes on it I knew it was mine, I quickly spun around almost falling before running back to Dean feeling like a kid on Christmas morning. “Dean Dean Dean Dean!” He turned around, pulling a gun, “‘What where is it, what is it?” I stopped a few feet away, “Not a monster, Dean, I found it.” He put his gun away and motioned for me to lead the way. When I got back to the frame of the car, I put my hand on it “This one; I want this one.” He looked under the hood “Well it has a motor at least, and some tires that are only good for pushing the car. Stay here, and I’ll go get the tow truck.” Dean came back a moment later with the tow truck, and I helped him to hook up the car. “Now you are sure you want this one?” I answered without hesitation, “Yes.” He shrugged and turned away “Alright then, let's get to work.” _

_ It took us a long time to get the car fixed, but once we got it running and fixed the way Dean saw fit he pushed it into a garage and grabbed a gun used to paint a car. He covered the car with tape so that the paint wouldn’t touch certain areas before he turned to me, “Alright kid, what color do you want it?” I walked around the car, thinking, and I couldn’t help but think of Icarus for a split second. “Paint it black with grey stripes down the center of the car.” Dean nodded and told me to get some rest while he finished painting the car. I shook my head, “Oh no, I wanna watch, and I know just the song  for this too.”  _

_ I pulled out my phone and played Flower by Moby and Dean turned around giving me a strange look, “What is that?” I groaned and rolled my eyes “Seriously, Dean, you’ve never seen the movie?” He frowned at me, “What movie?” I rolled my eyes again “Gone in Sixty Seconds, Nicolas Cage plays in it, you’ve seriously never heard of it?” Dean shook his head “No, can’t say that I have.” I huffed and crossed my arms “Well, I know what we are doing when we get back to the Bunker.” Dean laughed, “Okay, whatever you say, kid.” _

_ When Dean got the car painted, I was laying in the back seat of the Impala sleeping. “Hey wake up, your car is done!” I jumped out of my skin when he slammed his hand on the roof of the Impala. “Jeez Dean, ever heard of waking someone up gently?” He grinned at me, “Yeah, but your reaction was priceless. You jumped like ten feet; it was awesome.” I rolled my eyes, “Oh, shut up. You said you got my car done?” He nodded and opened the door, “Sure did, come tell me what you think.” I hopped out of the car and walked over to the garage and gasped; it was beautiful. _

_ I squealed and ran up to Dean, hugging him, “Thank you!” He laughed and hugged me back “No problem kiddo, now come on, let's get back to the Bunker, we have a movie to watch, remember?” I nodded my head and ran over to the driver side door of my new car and hopping in. I put my hands on the steering wheel and whispered to the car, “Hello Icarus.” _

_ _

_ **::END FLASHBACK::** _

I sat down in my car, running my hand gently along the steering wheel “We are taking a trip buddy, gonna find who I named you after.” I put the key into the ignition and started it, the engine came to life with a roar, and I felt a shiver go down my spine. “I’ll never get used to that, ever.” I had made a few changes to the car’s interior, nothing too drastic, just put a new radio into it so I could plug my phone up and listen to music through it. Which was precisely what I was doing at that moment “Alright, what are we listening to for the trip?” I pressed shuffle on my playlist and waited for the music to start “Back in Black by AC/DC, huh? Alright, then.”

Right as I put the car into reverse Dean came into the garage and stood behind it. I sighed and rolled my eyes stepping out of the car, letting the music blast into the garage. “What Dean?” He didn’t say anything, and I got frustrated, so I stepped up to him, “Seriously dude what?” He grabbed me and pulled me into a bone-crushing hug, and I let out a breath hugging him back. “You be careful out there Heather, I mean it.” He gently pushed me back and handed me his gun. “Dean, are you sure, I mean that is your gun.”

“I know, that's why I’m giving it to you because I know my gun won’t give you any issues. And Motley Crue, seriously?” I rolled my eyes as Wild Side played through the speakers. “House rules Dean.” He chuckled, “Okay, okay, you got me.” I nodded, “Uh-huh, and I don’t wanna hear you talk shit about Bon Jovi either.” He rolled his eyes “Fine. But seriously you be careful, and when you find him… come home, okay?” I looked at him, shocked, “Dean, are you sure?” He nodded, “Yeah, you’ve got an attachment to him. I can tell, I heard you call your car that.”

I stiffened, “You heard that, huh?” He just nodded, “Yeah I did, and listen, I may not like that son of a bitch, but if he protects you, then I guess I can tolerate him.” I nodded and turned my back, opening the trunk and putting the gun in with the rest of my arsenal. “Heather, aren't you forgetting something?” I turned around as Dean pulled out a can of white spray paint. “Oh yeah.” He went over and painted a Devil’s Trap on the inside of the trunk lid. “Now you are good to go.” I gave him another hug before getting back into the car and carefully pulling out of the garage. “Let's go find ourselves a demonic leviathan, how hard can that be?”


	14. Call Me Your Monster

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shit gets confusing!

Come to find out, finding Icarus was easier said than done, I was chasing him across the country by this point, and I was getting sick of it. I sighed and threw my keys on the table beside the bed of my motel room, rolling my eyes. “Wanted to be close to me Cas says, right.” I hopped into the shower and got cleaned up while also allowing me to clear my head. When I got done, I crashed onto the bed, keeping my ax close by just in case, along with Dean’s gun beside me on the table. I sighed and rolled over onto my back, looking up at the ceiling, “Seriously Icarus, stop hiding from me.” 

I woke up to the sound of the motel’s alarm, and I groaned slamming my hand down onto it. “Shut up already, jeez.” I sat up, the muscles in my shoulders and back tense. “I hate motels, never have enough support.” I heard a knock on the door, and I rolled my eyes. “What?!” I wasn’t exactly the nicest person in the mornings. “I have a letter for you, ma'am.” I got up and grabbed Dean’s gun “Slip it under the door, I’m not exactly decent.” There was a shuffling sound, and an envelope was pushed under the door.

I sighed and went to the bathroom to brush my teeth and get dressed. “Who the hell writes letters anymore? That is what texting is for, what is this the 1940’s?” I went over to the door when I was dressed and picked up the envelope inspecting it. My name was on the front in bold lettering, and I sat down on the bad before opening the envelope.

 

Did you really think that I would hide from you, Sweetheart?

~ ICARUS

  
  
I rolled my eyes, “You’ve got to be joking.” I stood up and placing the letter back in the envelope and grabbed my things before heading out the door. I put my stuff in the trunk while looking around. If Icarus wrote that letter asking that question, then he must be close, very close. I closed the trunk of the car and turned around to go give the keys to the room back until I saw someone leaning against the chain-link fence.

 I walked over and gasped at who I saw “Cas?” But it wasn’t Castiel, I could tell by how he dressed, and that leather jacket. “Guess again, Sweetheart.” I swallowed, “Why do you look like Cas, Icarus?” He smiled at me, “Well, I wanted to show up in a form you were familiar with, didn’t want to scare you away.” I nodded my head, I wasn’t about to complain. “So, where have you been, I’ve been chasing you all over, why now?”

Icarus sighed, “I would have come sooner, but you little Angel is on a rampage.” I looked at him, confused, “What do you mean?” He looked just as confused as I felt. “So they haven’t told you then have they?” I was beginning to get frustrated and worried, “Tell me what Icarus?” He shoved himself away from the fence and stood in front of me, “Your Angel has been smiting Demons, Heather, a lot of them, and not with his Angel Blade.” 

I was having a hard time processing what I was being told. “I mean he is an Angel Icarus, that is kinda what he does.” Icarus rolled his eyes that I just happened to realize were blue like Castiel’s, this was going to be confusing. “He’s doing it alone, he isn’t with the Winchesters this time.”

I crossed my arms “So what, you telling me he has gone rogue or something?” Icarus nodded, “Rogue on them and on you, but I know what he is looking for, Demons talk.” I huffed, “Is he on a holy mission or something?” Icarus grinned “Let's just say its ‘or something’.” I stood there, taking in all of the information when Icarus suddenly spoke up. “So, how did you get here?” I grinned, “I drove.” He chuckled, “I realize that I mean which one is yours?” I became giddy, “Come on, I’ll show you.”

I turned around and walked back to my car, Icarus close on my heels. “This one, this is my Baby.” Icarus circled the car, “You buy it?” I laughed, “Yeah right, like I have that kind of cash Icarus.” He glanced over at me in a suggestive manner, “Steal it then?” I rolled my eyes “No, Dean took me to this old junkyard, and he rebuilt him from the ground up for me, paint and all.” Icarus looked at me strangely “You called the car him? Have you named it or something?”

I looked down and slipped into the driver’s seat, ignoring his question. “Come on, we have a lot of road to cover before we get back.” I heard him chuckle, “So you did name it.” He slid into the seat next to me and shut the door while I hooked up my phone to the radio. “Yeah maybe I did, what about it?” He smirked at me, “No, I’m not telling you what I named him.” He chuckled, “Oh, come on, Sweetheart, don’t you trust me?” I rolled my eyes “I brought you back, didn’t I?” He shut up at that one, “Yeah, that’s what I thought.” I turned on the car only for Sweet Dreams by Marilyn Manson to start playing.

“So you like rock music noted.” I put the car in reverse and backed out of the parking lot. “So are you going to tell me where we are going, Sweetheart?” I nodded my head, “Yeah, we are heading home.” Before Icarus could ask another question, my phone began to ring, and I put it on speaker. “I’m driving Dean this had better be good.” There was silence on the other end for a second. “Dean?” There was noise, and Sam’s voice came through the speakers, “Heather, it’s Sam, listen, how far out are you?” Something in his tone threw me off “I’m about a week’s drive out Sam, what is it?” There was shouting on the other end in the distance “It’s Cas, something is wrong.” I slammed on the breaks and pulled over “What?” Sam turned on the video camera on his phone and flipped it to the front-facing camera and what I saw made my heart drop.

It was Castiel, he was huddled against the was clutching his Angel Blade in front of him. “Sam, what the hell is going on?” The camera shut off before Sam’s voice came through again “We don’t know, he attacked Dean earlier, and now this.” I stiffened, “He did what?” Dean cut through, “You heard him, Heather, he friggin attacked me.” Icarus shifted beside me, and I gave him a look and shook my head. “Why did he attack you, Dean?” Dean looked down “It wasn’t his fault, he’s been a little off ever since you left, we think it’s Naomi again.”

I frowned, “Who?” The camera turned back on, and Dean’s face came onto the screen. “Just get back to the bunker as soon as you can. You find Icarus yet?” I nodded, “Yeah, he’s sitting right here, why?” Dean sighed, “We could use him, he was in Cas’ head for a while, maybe he knows something.” Icarus scoffed “Oh yeah, I know her, nasty bitch Naomi.” Dean looked at me, confused, “Why does he sound like Cas?” I gave him a nervous glance. “He said he didn’t want to freak me out, so he took the form of someone I knew.” Dean rolled his eyes “Just get back here and hurry, Cas is in bad shape, we have him locked up in here for now, but I don’t know how long it will hold.”

The call ended, and I shoved the car into gear and spun the tires eager to get back home. “Who is Naomi Icarus?” Icarus sighed “She basically is an Angel doctor, but think more Dr. Frankenstein and less Dr. Oz.” I gripped the steering wheel “So she does experiments on them?” Icarus shook his head “No, she wipes their memories, factory resets them, and the procedure isn’t pretty.” I pushed harder on the gas, “Not pretty how?” Icarus sighed, “Think lobotomy, and that is what you are looking at, except they aren’t sedated first.”

I swallowed thickly, what Icarus was telling me wasn’t doctoring, it was torture. “So she does this why?” Icarus shrugged “No idea, but what I do know is that Castiel has been through this several times. When he first lifted Dean from hell and started to rebel against Heaven, she pulled him up there and did it. That was a long time ago, though.” I was becoming angrier the more I was hearing, “So why is she doing this now?” Icarus was silent for a minute before he answered, “Probably because of what he is looking for. If he isn’t following her orders, then that is what she does.”

“So let me get this straight, Angels are basically machines? Except Castiel is more human than machine, and she is trying to turn him back into a machine?” Icarus nodded, “Yeah, basically.” I sighed, “Do you sleep Icarus?” He looked at me, confused, “What?” I looked over briefly, “Do you sleep?” He just shook his head “No, I don’t sleep.” I nodded, “Good, 'cause we aren’t stopping.” He laughed, “You’re insane, you need rest.” I glanced over at him, “I know, you drive while I rest, and if you wreck my car Icarus I swear to God, I will kill you.” He raised his hands, “Alright, I won’t, but where are we going?” I gripped the steering wheel tightly again, “Lebanon, Kansas, we are going to the Bunker.”

**_::ONE WEEK LATER::_ **

“Hey wake up.” I felt someone gently shaking my shoulder, and I groaned, “Ugh, what?” I heard the car shut off “We are here now wake up.” I yawned and stretched, “What, how did you even?” Icarus chuckled “I went through your memories while you slept.” I bolted straight up, “You did what?!”

Icarus raised his hands “Easy there sweetheart, listen you needed rest last night, so I read your mind and got here. Oh, and by the way, I like what you named the car.” I hit his arm, “Shut up.” I climbed out of the car that Icarus had parked outside the Bunker’s front door and headed inside. “Sam, Dean?! Anyone here?!” Sam came running through the hall into the library. “Heather, hey.” He came over and gave me a hug, and I returned it. “How is he?” Sam looked down and shook his head “‘It’s not good.”

“Nice place you’ve got here, for Hunter’s anyway.” Sam stiffened up at the sight of Icarus standing in the doorway. “Heather…” I raised my hand to stop him “I know I know, he looks like Cas.” Sam scoffed “Yeah, no kidding… come on, I’ll take you to Cas.” I followed Sam down to the bedrooms, and he opened the door allowing me inside, and I almost broke. 

Castiel was laying on the bed chained down with what I could only assume were chains that had been enchanted to hold an Angel captive. He appeared to be sleeping until his eyes shot open and he started screaming. I ran over and sat down on the bed next to him. “Cas, Cas hey, hey!” He pulled against the chains trying to get loose, and I gently put my hand on his chest. This seemed to snap him out of whatever was going on, and he locked eyes with me. “Heather?” 

“Yeah, hey, Cas.” I ran my hand through his hair as Castiel tried to calm his breathing “You shouldn’t be here, Naomi, she wants you, you need to go.” I shook my head, “No, Cas, I’m not going anywhere.” Castiel jerked and cried out again, yanking against his restraints before calming back down. “She is going to take me, you have to promise not to come after me.” I looked at him in shock, “Like hell, I’m not gonna promise that.” I unfurled my wings “You see those marks Castiel? You remember the promise I made you when you put them there?” I nodded, “Alright then, I’m gonna find this bitch and kill her, understand?”

I lifted my wings and brought them down on the chains holding his wrists down to the bed. Sam went to stop me, but I heard Icarus step in front of him and growl. “If you’re smart, which I’ve heard you are the smart one, then you won’t touch her.” Castiel sat up and wrapped me up in a hug, his wings enveloping me. “She will kill you, Heather. She knows I’m attached to you, she knew that torturing me like this would bring you straight to her, don’t fall into her trap.” I kissed his forehead, “I’m not going to.” I felt Castiel go rigid, and when I looked into his eyes, they were empty, devoid of all emotion before he disappeared.

“How do we get into Heaven, Sam?” Sam looked at me, confused, “What?” I stood up angrily, “You heard me, how do we get in?” Dean rounded the corner, “What’s goin’ on, where the hell is Cas?” I glared at Sam “He’s gone, Dean, Naomi took him.” I stormed up to them, “Exactly so how do I get in.” Dean shook his head “You aren’t getting into anywhere Heather, these are Angels we are talking about, you aren’t ready for that.” 

I heard Icarus chuckle behind me “She might not be, but I am, I can get her in and out safely, plus, I know where their little entrance is.” I turned around, “You do? How and how are you going to defeat Angels?” He smirked at me, “I’m half leviathan sweetheart, I can take on anything. A few little Angels don’t scare me much, if anything, I scare them.” I watched his blue irises turn black as he flicked his gaze up to Dean and Sam and a shiver went down my spine.

“Yeah well, I don’t like it,” Dean spoke up sounding defiant, and Icarus stepped in front of him. “I don’t really care what you do and don’t like, you grunt. She wants her Angel back, so that is what she is going to get.” Dean went to lunge at Icarus just to be shoved back against the wall by him. Icarus’ arm was pressed against Dean’s throat “Now Dean...you really need to control that temper of yours.” Icarus tilted his head “I don’t want to have to hurt you, Dean…” Icarus laughed at his own words “Actually yeah, yeah I really do....really, really bad especially after that little move you pulled back in Purgatory. But I’m not really mad about that, after all, you got me out of there.”

Sam went to get Icarus off of Dean only to be stopped by Icarus’ stare. “Sam I don’t have anything against you, don’t make me hurt you too.” I grabbed Sam’s arm and pulled him back, shaking my head when he looked at me. Icarus turned his attention back to Dean, “No, what I’m angry about is you not only aiming a gun at my little sweetheart but also  _ shooting at her. _ ” Icarus growled the last words, “I would kill you, Dean, but I won’t. It seems Heather has taken a liking to you, so for that reason alone, I won’t kill you. But if you want your Angel back, which I’m sure you do, then you stay out of my way.” Icarus gave one last push against Dean’s throat before dropping him to the floor and backing away.

“Now then, we have an Angel to save, right?” When Icarus turned around, his eyes were once again that ice-blue like Castiel’s. Icarus came up to me, and I took a step back, which he noticed immediately, “Did I scare you, sweetheart?” I took another step back and hid behind Sam. “Yeah, I think you scared her Icarus.” Sam wrapped his arm around behind his back in a protective manner “How do we know you aren’t going to hurt her?” Icarus looked offended, “You’re joking.” Sam scoffed “No, I’m serious, you’re a Demon, and trust me when I say I know how Demons work.” Icarus crossed his arms “What’s the matter, Sam? You think I’m gonna pull a Ruby and stab her in the back right?” 

Sam tensed “How do you know about that?” Icarus chuckled “Sam I have been in Castiel’s head remember? I know a lot of things about you and your brother, and I know all about the addiction you had to Demon Blood.” I took a step away from Sam and looked between him and Icarus, “Oh, you didn’t tell her about that, did you?” Sam swallowed hard, “Shut up.” Icarus grinned “You’re saying all this horrible stuff about me, but Sam, you aren’t being truthful to her, are you?” 

Icarus looked over at me “Yeah I’m a Demon, well… half leviathan but I’m not getting technical about it. But I have yet to lie to her, I even told her I read her mind earlier. I mean what good would it do to lie to her, hm?” He looked back over to Sam and tilted his head grinning, “You want to know something else? I was also the first one to tell her about Castiel going rouge, she was so confused when I told her, and shocked when I told her that you all knew and didn’t tell her first.” Dean stood up and walked over to Sam, “Yeah, we didn’t tell her because she was out looking for you. We didn’t want her to worry while she was doing that. So sue us, have we been totally honest with her? Probably not, but it was to protect her, she doesn’t need to get into this life, she's still young.”

I scoffed, “So what Dean? I’m still young, so I can go out and find a guy to settle down with right? You’re joking, with these wings? Yeah, that’ll be super easy.” Dean flinched for a second “So tell me, Dean, what is Cas after? Be honest about that at least?” He looked down for a moment, “He is after the Angel Tablet.” I looked at him, confused, “I’m sorry he is after what?” Icarus spoke before Dean got the chance to “The Angel Tablet, he has all information about Angel’s, their strengths, weaknesses, how to slam the gates of Heaven and lock them away, you know, nothing major.” 

I clenched my jaw, “And you didn’t think to tell me about this?!” Dean clenched his fists “No we didn’t tell you okay? We didn’t tell you because we didn’t want you to get hurt!” I crossed my arms, “How long?” Dean looked confused, “What?” I walked up to him “How long have you been hiding this from me, Dean?” Dean just stared me down without answering “About a month, but Heather listen you aren’t ready to be wrapped up in something this big, you could get seriously hurt or killed.” I snapped, “You knew about this for a month, and you didn’t tell me?! So you kept me in the dark about this while Cas was out there being controlled by some bitch named Naomi and you were concerned about my safety? Mine?!” I flared my wings out and shoved both Sam and Dean backward with them. “You sent my Angel out there to find this tablet or whatever the hell it is, and you didn’t tell me?!”

“He wasn’t alone Heather, we went with him if you would just calm down and listen to us for a second.” I rounded on Dean “He isn’t your pawn that you can just use Dean! He cares about both of you, comes whenever you call him, and you just use him whenever you need something?!” I was on a roll, my anger boiling over “And then when he does need your help with one thing, you go and tell him that you don’t care that he is broken?! After everything that he did for you, he  _ died _ for you, and this is what you do?!” Sam and Dean both looked at me in shock, and I turned around, shaking with rage and irritation before taking a deep breath and looking over at Icarus. “Where is it, where is this back door Icarus?”

During my outburst, Icarus had moved to lean against the wall, one foot on the floor while the other was against the wall behind him. He walked away from the wall, “You’re looking at it, Sweetheart.” Dean laughed, “You? You’ve gotta be kiddin’ me.” Icarus looked past me and over to Dean, “I’m the only one that can get her in there, I have wings dumbass.” Dean looked insulted as Sam decided to speak, “But you’re a demon, they aren’t going to let you in there.” Icarus just rolled his eyes “I’m half leviathan, Sam, that means that I’m more powerful than their little angelic forces or whatever, I can get in there, don’t you worry about that.”

“But even if you do get in, they won’t let Heather get very far, I mean a living human in Heaven? I don’t think that they will let that happen.” Again Icarus rolled his eyes at Sam “You know the marks on her wings? That little claim that Castiel put on her soul? Yeah, she can go up there whenever she likes Sam, they aren’t going to stop her.” Sam went quiet, and I went up to Icarus, who looked down at me before spreading his wings. “Shall we go?” I nodded, and he gently grabbed me and pulled me to him, “Hang on this won’t be a smooth ride, sweetheart.” I wrapped my arms around his waist and buried my face into his superheated chest, closing my eyes. “Now let's go save your Angel.” There was a gust of wind and the sound of flapping wings as we left the Bunker.


	15. Welcome To Heaven, Angel

“Alright, Sweetheart, you can open your eyes now.” I opened my eyes and looked around. What I was seeing was not what I was expecting “Well, this is...underwhelming.” Icarus chuckled “Not what you were expecting, Sweetheart?” I shook my head, “Not really, I was expecting golden streets, crystal rivers, rainbows, and thrones, not a white hallway with doors.” Icarus just laughed, “You should see Hell then, and let me guess, you’re thinking fire and darkness right?” I nodded, and he rolled his eyes “That is more like the Cage, from what I’ve heard anyway.” Icarus slipped off his jacket and placed it over my shoulders “Don’t want everyone seeing those pretty wings of yours, not yet anyway.”

I started walking down the hallway and looked at the doors, some had numbers, others had names, and I looked over my shoulder at Icarus. “How are we supposed to find Cas just go knocking on every door and see who answers?” Icarus shrugged his shoulders just as a scream echoed through the halls. I felt a sharp pain go through my wings, and I doubled over “Shit.” Icarus was at my side in a second, “Heather, what’s wrong?” Another scream followed by another pained jolt, “It’s Cas, come on.” 

I stood up and sprinted down the halls following the screams until I came to a grey colored door that read _“Operating Room.”_ Icarus gently pulled me back and kicked in the door before stepping inside. Two angels attacked him out of nowhere, and Icarus impaled them both using the spiked bones on his wings. “You know, Angel’s can’t beat me, right?” I ran in behind him and turned to see a white chair similar to the one that you would see in a dentist office. A woman was standing over it who hadn’t seen the commotion that happened just outside, that or she didn’t care. I walked through the two glass doors that separated the chair from the other room, “Hey!” 

I saw Castiel strapped down to the chair, and the one I assumed was Naomi with what looked like a drill in her hand. “You touch him again, and I swear to God.” She smirked at me, “So you must be Heather, right? Mind telling me how you got in here?” I walked up to her and looked over to Castiel. He stared up at me with a blank look, there was no emotion behind those blue eyes, and I started to worry. “What did you do?” Naomi turned her back to me and sat down behind a desk “I reset him, his feelings for you were getting in the way of his mission. Now my question is, why does he feel so strongly for you?” I felt my anger start to rise “You did what?!” Naomi sighed, “I fixed him.” 

Icarus came through the door, and Naomi looked shocked “How did you get up here, demon?” Icarus dramatically shrugged his shoulders before spreading his wings “I have wings you know. Don’t bother with your guards, by the way; I put them down already. I don’t understand why they think they can beat me; I mean leviathan’s beat angels every time.” Naomi stood up and walked over to me before walking around me, looking me up and down. “He fought hard this time, he kept calling out to you, but I don’t understand why. Typically it's easy to reset him, I’ve done it several times, so many in fact that it doesn’t take long since I know exactly what to do to reset Castiel. But this time was different.” 

“He’s not a damn machine you bitch.” Naomi looked shocked “You are in Heaven girl, you shall not curse here.” I shoved her, “Go to hell, Icarus, can you get Cas out of there?” I heard a loud clicking sound as the restraints were released and I watched as Castiel stood up, but there was something wrong, the way he stood up was too robotic, like a machine. “Cas?” He looked over at me with that same blank stare, and I felt my heart sink. “Yes, Castiel come here,” Naomi called him over, and he followed her command without hesitation. She placed a hand on his shoulder “Do you remember your training, Castiel?” Castiel’s eyes locked with my own and I backed up, they were so empty, dead even, no emotion, no recognition, nothing. 

“Terminate her, Castiel.” I watched as his Angel Blade slid down from inside his sleeve and I backed away. “Cas…” He walked towards me, and I froze, “Cas, please…” He reached out to grab me, and I dodged out of the way. He came at me again, and this time I let him catch me. He raised his Angel Blade over his shoulder just as Icarus grabbed Naomi from behind putting an Angel Blade to her throat. “Call him off, or you die, your choice.” Naomi struggled against Icarus, but he was too strong, Icarus pressed the blade harder against her throat, making a small cut allowing her grace to shine through. “Castiel stop!”

Castiel went stiff as he continued to stare down at me. I gently got out of his grip and backed away, his eyes still following me. “Come on Cas....snap out of it.” He just kept staring at me, and I felt my heart shatter. “Dammit, Cas...please, we need you, Dean and Sam need you. Do you remember what I promised you?” Icarus’ guard slipped for a moment, and Naomi stabbed him with her drill, causing him to double over. “Castiel kill her!” Castiel grabbed my arm and brought the Angel Blade down towards me. In a second of fear, I wrapped my wings around myself without thinking. I was expecting to feel pain, but it never came. Instead, I heard the sound of metal hitting the floor, and I looked up. 

Castiel looked shocked as he stumbled backward away from me, grabbing the arm of the chair to steady himself. Naomi looked just as shocked “So that explains it…” I stood up straight and spread my wings across the room, allowing Castiel’s mark to be seen clearly. “...He claimed you didn’t he? You are his Charge.” I lifted my hands and took a step forward only for Castiel to back away farther; he looked shocked and scared. I felt terrible, but at least it was an emotion. “Cas, hey… easy, don’t be scared, I won’t hurt you.” I slowly sat down on the floor across from him, and he tilted his head at me, he didn’t look scared anymore, just nervous and cautious.

“See, I won’t hurt you, I would never hurt you Cas.” He slowly stepped towards me before sitting down across from me. He stared at my wings, and I slowly moved them, so they were somewhat circling him. “You can touch them if you want, it's okay.” He slowly started to reach out, and Naomi tried to get his attention “Castiel! Stop this; remember your mission!” He stopped and looked over his shoulder at her as Icarus grabbed her. “That little drill of yours hurts, but guess what? I have it now, and I’m going to have a little fun.” He wrestled her into the chair and strapped her down before turning on the drill.

I grabbed Castiel’s arm gently, “Cas, hey, look at me.” He slowly looked back over to me. “It’s okay. She was hurting you, remember?” I slowly reached up and placed my hand on the side of his face. “She was hurting you bad, Cas.” His eyes locked with mine and I saw a faint flicker of recognition. I moved my wing a little “You still want to touch one? You can. It’s okay.” He reached out again and ran his hand along the top of my wing, and I shivered a little. He watched me and ran his hand over his mark before stilling over it. I felt my wing tingle and watched as those blue-colored veins appear like they had when he first touched them in Purgatory. I felt something similar to static electricity before I watched Cas’ eyes roll back into his head and collapsed onto the floor. 

“Cas? Cas!” He started convulsing like he was having a seizure and I brought his head into my lap and stroked his hair until he stopped jerking and went still. His breath was short and staggered, but he was still breathing. I gently laid him down, folding up Icarus’ jacket to make a pillow for his head, before standing up and walking over to Naomi, who was strapped to the chair. I hopped up on her desk, putting my right foot flat on it while my other foot dangled off the side. “Alright talk. what's the deal with this Angel Tablet of yours and why do you want it so bad?”

Naomi laughed at me, “I’m not telling you anything, and even if I was going to tell you anything, why should I?” I sighed “Because if you don’t then Icarus is gonna have his fun with you, give you a taste of your own medicine. Or I give it to you and trust me; you don’t want me giving it to you.” Icarus flicked his gaze over to me and smirked “Fiesty little thing isn’t she Naomi? My little _sin_.”

Naomi struggled in the chair “That’s funny coming from an abomination, I don’t know why she chose to save you, or why Castiel chose to save you, then again Castiel always was defective, came off the line with a crack in his chassis. He doesn’t even die right, keeps coming back and keeps screwing up.” I rolled my eyes, “Like you are doing any better, if you ask me, Castiel is more of an Angel than you.”

Naomi scoffed “He’s not an Angel, he can’t follow orders without questioning them, fighting against them. He killed thousands of Angels, thousands of Humans, he’s a mess, a failure, _fallen._ ” I lept off the desk, grabbing Castiel’s blade from off of the floor and held it up to Naomi’s throat. “You listen here you bitch, Castiel might be a lot of things, but he isn’t a failure. He may be what you call fallen, but he is _my fallen,_ you understand.” Naomi looked at me and scoffed, “You think he loves you, don’t you?” My grip on the blade tightened at her words. “Silly girl, don’t you know, Angel’s can’t feel emotions like that? They don’t feel emotions at all. They don’t understand you like you think they do. They are soldiers created to follow orders, that’s all.”

I raised the blade above my head and moved to drive it through her chest, but a hand caught my wrist while an arm wrapped around my waist and pulled me back. “Heather, stop.” I struggled,  my temper getting the best of me but Castiel’s grip held firm. “Enough!” I flinched under his tone and went still, and I heard Castiel sigh as he turned me around to face him, his hands resting on my shoulders. “I told you not to come after me, Heather, why didn’t you listen?” I heard Icarus scoff, “You’re joking. She came because she wanted to help you, Castiel.”

Castiel locked eyes with Icarus and went rigid “How did you get up here?” Icarus smirked “I have my ways, don’t you worry about it. I got Heather up here, that’s all you need to know.” Castiel frowned at Icarus before looking back down at me “I almost killed you…” I shook my head, “Oh no, this wasn’t your fault, don’t you blame yourself, don’t you dare.” Naomi laughed, “Do you want to know what his training was? I had him kill you, hundreds if not thousands of times. He didn’t do it at first, but he figured out that him killing you was merciful compared to me. Eventually, he did it brutally and without hesitation. Like a true soldier, like an Angel.”

Castiel glared at Naomi “Enough.” Naomi shrugged “I’m only telling her the truth Castiel. Tell her. You are only protecting and caring for her because she’s your Charge. The Castiel I knew, the Castiel that was around during the Apocalypse, that Castiel wouldn’t have acted like this, soft, human. He was a true soldier who led armies, who would have done anything to complete his task, to serve Heaven.” Castiel shook his head “Then you met the Winchesters, the two who you let stop the Apocalypse Castiel, they had a prophecy to fulfill, and you let them stop it. You let them stop Heaven, yet you say you serve Heaven.” 

 “I do.” Naomi scoffed “No, you don’t, you serve the Winchesters, you serve humanity, you don’t serve Heaven, you don’t serve God Castiel, you serve yourself.” Castiel’s grip on my shoulders tightened “I asked you to bring the tablet back to Heaven where it belongs, and you disobeyed. You hid it.” Castiel’s blue eyes turned to steel “That tablet, was not meant to be in Angel's hands, Naomi. It wasn’t meant for us to have!” I could tell he was angry, and I gently lifted his hands off of my shoulders and held them in my own.

“Yet you took it for yourself. If it wasn’t meant for Angels, then it wasn’t meant for you either Castiel.” Castiel looked away from Naomi in annoyance “I took it to protect it. That was what our mission was, to protect the word of God, every Angel knows that.” Naomi looked like she wanted to smack Castiel, “What safer place for it than here, Castiel?” I rolled my eyes, “Okay, that's enough, you’re going in fucking circles here.” Naomi glared at me, “I wasn’t speaking to you.” I spun around to face her “I don’t give a damn, you have spoken enough.”

I walked up to her and raised the angel blade to her throat. “Heather, don’t.” I wanted to kill her, I wanted to tear out her throat, but I had other things in mind. “I’m not going to kill her Cas.” I looked over to Icarus who grinned, “Oh no, you’re going to do much worse aren’t you sweetheart.” I looked over my shoulder at Castiel, who looked confused. “Go home, Cas; you don’t need to see this.” Castiel walked up to me and spun me around, “Heather, what are you planning.” I couldn’t look at him, so I looked at the floor instead. “Heather.” Castiel lifted my head to look at him “She hurt you, Cas.” Castiel shook his head “That doesn’t matter.” 

“Doesn’t matter?!” I was infuriated, “No.” I shook my head at Castiel’s response, “You don’t know what she said about you, do you?” He looked at me with confusion in his eyes “She said you were a failure Cas, she called you fallen.” I saw hurt flash in his eyes and he looked down “Maybe I am, she’s right, I’m not the Angel I once was.” I swallowed hard and placed my hand on his chest “No, you aren’t. You’re better than him, who you were Castiel, that’s not who you are _._ Listen, there was something my Mom used to say to me, emotions make us strong, not weak. You are strong Castiel, you hear me, you are fighting for humanity, for us. You are fighting for what you believe in Cas, and there is nothing wrong with that.” 

Castiel shook his head “But they are my brothers and sisters.” I shook my head and scoffed, “That doesn’t make them family Castiel. You have a home back at the Bunker, a family that cares about you with Sam and Dean. These Angel’s, you might fight for them, but they won’t fight for you, they sure as hell wouldn’t die for you.” He finally looked at me, and his eyes were full of sorrow. “Cas, look what she did to you, she tried to reset you, you aren’t a machine Cas. She wanted you to kill me. She doesn’t care about your feelings, Cas. She doesn’t care about you. _They don’t_ care about you, and the ones who do...the ones who do, they aren’t here Cas. You know why?” 

Castiel sunk to his knees, what I was saying was breaking him, but I had to tell him. “They aren’t here because they know the truth Cas, they know how corrupt this place has become, and they refuse to stay.” I crouched beside him, and he looked up at me, his eyes brimming with tears. “I...I just want to be an Angel.” I grabbed him and pulled him into me as I fell to the floor. “You are an Angel Castiel, and you are the best one I’ve ever seen.”

Castiel shook his head that was buried in my chest, and I hugged him tighter. “I’m not an Angel anymore. I’m _nothing_ .” My heart sank at his word, and it shattered when I saw his wings begin to lose their feathers. “Cas…” He clung onto me like he was drowning and I was the only thing keeping him afloat. “Castiel…please listen to me.” He looked up at me tears falling from his blue eyes “You are everything Cas. Everything to me, to Sam and Dean, to humanity, which you helped to save. You mean _everything_ to me.” I spread my wings and placed his hand on one, “You gave me these Castiel, and I made you a promise when you marked them.”

I placed my hand against one of his wings “Don’t give up on yourself Castiel. Don’t give up on your family. We love you. _I_ love you.” I watched as his feathers stopped falling and I let out a breath I didn’t realize I was holding. “You love me?” I nodded my head and gently ran my fingers through his hair “Yes, I love you, Castiel. Which is why I’m telling you to go back to the Bunker, to go Home. I have a score to settle, and I don’t want you to see what I’m going to do to her.” Castiel shook his head, “I will not leave you.” I sighed “You aren’t leaving me, Castiel, when I’m done here I-”

“No.” I looked at him, “What?” Castiel stood up, his eyes glowing with that brilliant light. “I said no.” He grabbed my arm and gently pulled me up and into his chest. “I will _not_ leave you.” His tone wasn’t threatening; it was sincere and compelling, but not aggressive. “Okay.” He locked eyes with me, the light still glowing as he stared at me. Castiel placed a hand on my face before bending down to kiss me. The kiss was warm and fueled with emotion like he was trying to convey his feelings, but he didn’t know how to put them into words, it took my breath away.

“You have fallen far Castiel. To have feelings is one thing, but to have them for your Charge?” Naomi’s voice grated my nerves, and  I felt my wings twitch with annoyance. Castiel ignored her and spun me around, pressing me against the wall one of his hands gripped my waist while the other went up and curled itself in my hair. I let out a breath, and Castiel backed away, his left hand resting gently against my neck. His eyes were still glowing as he looked at me before he nodded his head and stepped away. I took it as my sign to do what I had planned, and I looked over to Icarus. “Put her down.”


	16. Stripping Wings, Stealing Grace

“Come here,  _ Angel _ .” Icarus grabbed hold of Naomi before unlocking the restraints of the chair and throwing her to the floor. I tucked Castiel’s blade into Icarus’ jacket and walked over to stand in front of Naomi, who was lying flat on the floor. “Put her on her knees Icarus, and put her hands back in those restraints for me?” He didn’t have to be told twice. He grabbed the back of her shirt and yanked her up. “Oh, this is going to be  _ so much fun _ .” His eyes flashed black like a demon’s, and it was like staring into the abyss. He threw her arms into the restraints and backed away, moving the desk to the other side of the room.

“You know what Naomi, you’re not the only one who hates humanity. That must sound funny coming from another human, though, right? Especially an Angel’s Charge, but you know what I always found interesting while I was in school?” I walked around the chair glaring at her before sitting on one of the arms of it and grabbing Castiel’s blade from inside Icarus’ jacket and putting the sharp tip under her chin and tilting her head up. “Their torture methods, and you know what, I was shocked at just how cruel we humans can be. But typically, when we inflict  _ that  _ amount of pain on someone, they aren’t innocent; in fact, they typically have it coming.”

I stared Naomi in the eyes, “So believe me when I say, you have it coming. I mean you’ve  _ reset _ Cas, how many times?” She glared right back at me, “Quite frankly? Too damn many.” I sighed and nodded my head “Well, I have some good news for you. This was the last time you did that, in fact, it’s the last time you  _ reset _ anyone. There is a saying we humans have down on earth, ‘karma's a bitch,’ and it is, but most importantly, it’s ironic in the way it gets you. So, here’s what I’m going to do, I’m going to play karma, and I am going to reset  _ you _ , how does that sound?” Naomi scoffed, “Please, you don’t even know how to use that machine.” I nodded my head “True, but that’s not the reset that I am going to give you. I’m going to give you a whole new life actually, a new life with a new purpose, and a new master.”

I moved to where I was facing her back, “Cas, do all angel’s wings attach in the same place?” I heard a dark chuckle come from Icarus when he saw Naomi go rigid. Castiel swallowed “Yes they do typically, but it depends on what rank the angel is, for example, if it's a Seraph then they have several wings, but…” Icarus stepped up beside me “She isn’t a Seraph, she's just a regular angel with a huge ego.” I felt Icarus’ body heat as he came up behind me, gripping my hips and pulling me back into his chest. “You know I can see her wings, right Sweetheart? I could let you see them too if you want me to.” Naomi shook with rage “She has no right to see my wings.” 

“Oh, she has every right to see them, because you are the one on your knees and restrained.” I locked eyes with Icarus and nodded my head, and he put two fingers two my forehead, a touch I recognized. “You were in Castiel’s head for a while; you’re mannerisms are similar.” He shrugged his shoulders and motioned over to Naomi, “You should be able to see them now.” I looked over and saw Naomi’s wings, white with silver streaks. “Huh, interesting, I was expecting blood, considering your line of work.  I’ll tell you something interesting about Angel wings that I learned recently…” I gently grabbed one and ran my hand across it, and I felt Naomi shudder “They are sensitive, which means that they have nerves, which also means they can register pain, right?”

I saw Naomi begin to struggle, and I motioned for Icarus to grab one of her wings. The second Icarus touched them. Naomi went into a fit of rage “Get your hands off my wings, you disgusting wretch.” Icarus feigned a mock hurt “Ouch that almost hurt.” He chuckled at her, and I looked over to Cas who was looking nervous. “You can go home Cas, I told you that you don’t have to stay.” He just shook his head, and I sighed going over to him. “Cas…” He looked down at me “Is this really necessary?” I shook my head, “No, but you told me not to kill her, so I had to get creative.” Castiel shook his head “Show her some mercy, Heather.” I sighed “She didn’t show you any, I heard you Castiel, your cries of agony, she doesn’t deserve mercy.”

Castiel sighed and looked away from me, “Please, Cas, go back to the Bunker, please.” He shook his head and moved past me, his blue eyes turning to steel as he approached Naomi. “You were wrong, Naomi, I didn’t fall. I chose freedom, I chose humanity. We are supposed to be their shepherds, not their executioners.” Naomi laughed and shook her head “You’re wrong, Castiel, remember Egypt? We killed every firstborn child whose door wasn’t covered in lambs blood.” Castiel hands balled into fists “I wasn’t there for that, or I would have stopped it.” Naomi shook her head, “Oh, but you were there, Castiel, you just don’t remember it.” I walked up beside of Castiel who looked to be in shock, and I gently pulled him away from her.

“I killed innocents, children.” I felt anger course through me, and I turned to look at Icarus who was still holding one of Naomi’s wings. “Icarus, her wings, break them. I don’t care how you do it, snap them in half for all I care, just make sure it hurts.” I saw Icarus grin as Naomi’s face went pale a split second before I heard a loud crack followed by a scream. Castiel’s eyes lit up with his grace, and he stopped Icarus before he could break the other one. “How many times have you dug into my head!” Castiel’s rage was immense, and I backed away from him. Naomi shook with pain, and when she didn’t answer fast, enough Castiel gripped her other wing, which made her respond quicker.

“I-I don’t know! To many, I lost count!” I rushed over and grabbed Castiel’s arm, “Cas, wait!” He looked down at me, his eyes still lit and glowing with his grace. “Don't do it, you won’t forgive yourself afterward.” He slowly let go of her wing and stumbled backward, the light from his grace dimming before receding again. He lowered himself to the floor and looked up at me, “I scared you,  I’m sorry.” I shook my head, “No, it’s fine, I understand.” Icarus moved back over to Naomi’s wing and swiftly snapped it like he had the other one. Another scream left Naomi’s throat, and I watched as Castiel flinched a little. 

I turned around and drew Castiel’s angel blade “Tell me, when Angels fall, what happens to their wings?” Surprisingly Castiel spoke, his tone even “They burn up in the atmosphere while being shredded and torn from our backs.” I nodded, “So if that is what happens to angels who fall, then tell me, Naomi, why does Castiel still have his wings?” Naomi gasped when Icarus grabbed one of her broken wings “He didn’t fall!” I nodded my head and moved to where she could see me, “So you lied, right?” Naomi nodded, “Now correct me if I’m wrong, but isn’t lying a sin?” She nodded again, “Now what happens if an Angel sins? They fall, right? Which means they have their wings stripped from them, right?” Naomi gave me a pleading look “Please, have mercy.” I shrugged my shoulders, “Okay, fine.” 

I saw her let out a sigh of relief “Under one condition. You apologize to him, you apologize to Cas.” I held out my hand, “Come here, Cas.” I saw him swallow before he stood to his feet and walked over to stand behind me. “Spread your wings Castiel, let her see them.” He slowly spread them out, and I gently ran my hand across one, and he tensed, “Relax, I would never do that to you.” I ran some of his feathers between my fingers to calm him down. He wrapped one of his arms around me and pulled me into him; his eyes hooded as he stared down at me. He looked over me and over to Naomi before spreading his wings with a snap. He gently pushed me behind him as he walked over to Naomi and looking down at her.

I saw her shrink under his gaze and lower her head “I’m sorry Castiel, I was wrong, forgive me.” I felt my breath hitch in my throat, seeing this clear display of dominance that he was holding over her.  _ “You aren’t hiding your thoughts very well, Sweetheart.”  _ I glanced over to Icarus only to see him smirking at me “It’s rude to pry into someone's head, you know. I thought that you would have learned that lesson too.” Icarus chuckled and shook his head “Yes, but it's just so fun.” Castiel looked over his shoulder at me “He isn’t having to read your mind, Heather, your thoughts are rather loud at the moment. They are quite distracting.” I swallowed hard as Icarus tried to hold in his laughter “Busted Sweetheart.”

Castiel turned his attention back to Naomi when she looked between the three of us. “Is there an issue, Naomi?” Castiel’s tone was severe, and she looked down again “No, Castiel, I apologize.” I felt a swell of pride in my chest that wasn’t my own, and I looked over and noticed that Castiel was holding his wings just a little higher than before. Castiel held his hand out towards me and beckoned me over “Come here little flower.” I went over and took his hand gently “Will you show her mercy?” I nodded my head, “I will…” I looked over to Icarus and tossed him the angel blade. “But I didn’t say anything about Icarus.” 

Naomi looked terrified, “You promised!” I shook my head “No, I said that  _ I _ would show you mercy. I didn’t say anything about him, though.” Icarus stepped over, so he was behind Naomi before looking at me. “Cut her wings out of her and burn them.” Naomi screamed, “No! No please! I’ll do anything!” I shrugged, “You’re begging to the wrong one, I’m not the one with the blade.” Icarus crouched down behind her and started carving around one wing and yanking on it, tearing it free. The cries Naomi was emitting weren’t even human-sounding anymore. They were high pitched rings, and I covered my ears as I hit my knees. Castiel bent down and covered me with his wings blocking out most of the sound. “What is that?” 

“It’s her true form screaming, her vessel can’t put sound to that kind of agony.” Once the process was finished, Castiel stood and went to stand behind Naomi. He placed his hands on her shoulders, and a blue light came from his hands as he healed her wounds. “Now it’s my turn.” I took the Angel blade back from Icarus and had him hold her head back so that her throat was exposed. I ran the angel blade across her throat, exposing her grace and pulling it out of her using a small vile that Icarus had handed me. Castiel healed her throat before undoing her restraints and stepping away. The second she was free; she looked over and saw her wings laid out on the floor, a bloody and broken mess.

“Why… Why would you do this to me?” I poured holy oil over her wings then dropped a burning match on them. “Because you hurt my Angel. I made a promise to him when Benny and  I found him in Purgatory. I promised to protect him, I promised him that I wouldn’t let anyone hurt him like that again.” She just looked at me in shock, “I’m eliminating that problem, the ones who hurt him.” Naomi shook her head “What about Dean Winchester? You didn’t hurt him!” I shrugged my shoulders “I like Dean, we are family. You, I don’t know you, and what I do know about you I hate.” Icarus grabbed her up and held her arms behind her back. “We are taking you back to the bunker, we have questions, and you have answers.” 

Naomi struggled in Icarus’ grip, and he held her tighter “Why take me there, haven’t you tortured me enough!” Icarus snarled and wrapped his hand around her throat, shoving her against the wall “You will not speak to her that way.” Naomi looked at him in shock, “You… you’re bonded to her…” He grinned, “Not so dumb after all, are you?” She gasped for air, and he let her go, “What are you?” Icarus shrugged “I’m a demon with leviathan blood who has a dangerous attachment to her. Any more questions?”

“I don’t understand… demons don’t have soulmates… they don’t have Charges like angels do.” Icarus laughed “You’re right, they don’t, but I did inhabit Castiel for quite a while. I’m basically his dark side you could say if you want to call me that. It’s why I have wings when other Demons don’t. I’m what stemmed from his corruption while the Leviathans possessed him. He had Leviathan blood in his vessel, so when he chose her, I also chose her, so yes, she is also my Charge.”

Icarus tilted his head as Naomi just stared at him in shock, “That's… impossible.” Icarus rolled his eyes, “And yet I’m standing here.” She swallowed “She named you… didn’t she.” A rumble left his chest, and he nodded, “She did.” Naomi looked between myself and Icarus “What...what did she name you?” Icarus smirked as he backed away from her. “My name is Icarus, and I’m going to have so much  _ fun _ with you, Naomi. You’re going to be my little bitch.” Naomi scoffed, “I will never be your bitch.” Icarus giggled “Oh but you are, you wanna know why? Because I learned something while I was in Castiel’s head. There is only one thing you angels fear more than falling or becoming human.”

Naomi tried to run, but he pinned her back against the wall before snapping her neck. “Icarus!” I yelled at him in shock, “Relax sweetheart, I’ll fix her.” I watched as a bright light lifted from her chest, “Cas, what is that?” Castiel tilted his head, “It’s her soul.” I looked at him, confused, “I thought angels didn’t have souls?” He shook his head and narrowed his eyes “They don’t.” Icarus reached out and grabbed the soul, holding it in his hand while it squirmed trying to get free. “But humans do.” He whispered something that I couldn’t hear, and I watched the bright light turn into black smoke before he released it and it went back into Naomi’s mouth.

“Wait for it.” I jumped when Naomi took in a breath before scrambling backward, making Icarus laugh. “Now that’s more like it. You. Stand and come here.” I watched as Naomi stood up and walked over to Icarus. “Hello, pet.” Naomi didn’t look at him, and he grinned “See, I told you you were going to be my bitch to play with. Now go tell my little Sweetheart you’re sorry.” She cringed away from him and came over to me, locking eyes with me, “Hey!” Naomi jumped as Icarus strode over to stand behind me “You aren’t worthy enough to look into those pretty eyes of hers, it's disrespectful, and you will respect her.” 

Naomi quickly cast her eyes downward, and Castiel spoke up “This is interesting, a once feared angel now reduced to nothing, now she will understand true pain. She will understand  _ my _ pain.” I looked over at Castiel “Cas, what did I tell you? You aren’t nothing.” He looked down at me, “I know that now, but she is.” Naomi flinched as Castiel moved to stand in front of her “It doesn’t feel good, does it?” She didn’t answer him, and Castiel flared his wings out as his eyes lit up with his grace, “I asked you a question,  _ abomination _ .” 

I shivered at Castiel’s tone and choice of words, “I am an Angel, and I will end you, am I understood?” Icarus let out a long, low whistle, “Wow.” I only nodded and swallowed. Naomi shrunk away, “I understand, and no, Castiel, it does not feel good.” Castiel nodded before backing away from her and wrapping me up in his arms and looking down at me, his eyes still glowing. “Let’s go home.” I nodded, and he pulled me tightly against him before addressing Icarus, “Do what you want with her, I’m sure Crowley would love to have a go at her.” 

Icarus nodded before roughly grabbing Naomi and disappearing. “Thank you.” I looked up at Castiel and saw his eyes had stopped glowing “For what?” He ran his hand through my short hair “For coming after me and showing me what I’m worth. You pulled me from the edge, so thank you.” I reached up and placed my hand on his face, “I made you a promise Castiel, and I intend to keep it.” He nodded and pulled me into a kiss. “Hold on tight little flower, we are going home.”


	17. Mr. Crowley

Icarus appeared with Naomi inside an old abandoned asylum turned hideout for none other than the King of Hell itself, Crowley. “Cozy little place isn’t it?” Icarus commented as he drug Naomi down the hallway towards the “throne room.” He walked through the double doors with her in tow coming into the room and seeing Crowley sitting on his “throne” like usual. Crowley looked up when he heard the doors open, and his eyes widened. “Castiel and Naomi? How did you two get in here, this place is warded against Angels?” 

Icarus sighed and dramatically rolled his eyes “I’m not your Angel, Crowley, and she isn’t an Angel either, well, not anymore.” Crowley stood up and with a flick of his wrist slammed and locked the doors “What the bloody hell are you talking about?” Icarus blinked, turning his eyes black in the process before shrugging his shoulders dramatically “See, not your Angel.” Crowley frowned and walked over to them both “Who are you, and why have you brought her to me?” Icarus smirked “Oh you know, shits and giggles I guess. I am bringing you a former Angel to play with; you should be thanking me.” Crowley scoffed “Are you new here? I don’t have to thank a lower demon for anything; I’m the bloody King of Hell! Now, who are you?” Icarus shoved Naomi in Crowley’s direction only for her to fall to the floor.

“Half demon.” Crowley gave Icarus a confused look, “Pardon?” Icarus smirked, “I’m only half-demon, Crowley, can you guess the other half?” Naomi stood up and backed away from Icarus, which caught Crowley’s attention. “Let me make it easier for you. What is stronger than an Angel?” Crowley stiffened “Impossible.” Icarus’ smirk grew wider “You know, I’ve heard that word a lot recently.” He glanced over at Naomi, who glared at him “Go to hell.” Icarus laughed, “Now why would I do that, it's rude to barge into someone else's home. Don’t you think so, Fallen?” Naomi visibly flinched which caused Crowley to turn around and look at her. “Fallen? What is he talking about?”

Naomi refused to answer Crowley, which caused Icarus to roll his eyes “What’s wrong, Naomi? Don’t want to tell your new king who clipped your precious little wings?” The former Angel shook with anger, “You ripped them out, you retch!” Crowley looked at Icarus in shock “You tore out her wings? Why.” Icarus just shrugged and shook his head “Cause I wanted to hear her scream.” Naomi was seething, “You did it because your little _bitch_ -” She wasn’t able to finish her sentence because of Icarus’ hand wrapped tightly around her throat. “Now Naomi, what have I told you, hm?” She struggled in his grasp, and he only tightened his hold “I could snap your neck…” 

His grip tightened even further cutting her air supply off completely “But because Castiel told me to bring you here instead…” Icarus sighed and rolled his eyes, dropping Naomi to the floor “I’ll let you live.” Crowley cleared his throat “So you do know of our little Angel friend?” Icarus nodded as he turned back around to face Crowley “You could say that. I wouldn’t be here without him, you know, corruption of the mind and all that.” 

“Excuse me?” Icarus rolled his eyes, “Do I have to explain the whole story to you too?” When Crowley put his hands in his pockets and stared back at him, he sighed, “When the Leviathans possessed Castiel, his mind and body became corrupt. His blood turned black and went mad, sort of. Because he was corrupted, his mind and grace also became corrupted, and what creatures are born of corruption?” Crowley frowned “Demons.” Icarus winked “Bingo. So when his mind became corrupt, half of his grace also became corrupt, effectively turning him half-demon, half-angel. The blood that was flowing through his vessel was pure Leviathan blood, so you mix those two potent things into something as powerful as an Angel, you get a split personality that isn’t a personality.”

Crowley was confused, “So if you were just a split personality, then how are you standing here?” Icarus chuckled “Leviathan blood remember? The blood corrupted him. I corrupted him. When we were found in Purgatory, since Castiel decided to return there to keep humanity safe from himself, we met someone special.” Crowley went to go sit back on his throne, “Go on.” Icarus chuckled at the memory “She told Castiel a story about a man named Icarus, I liked the name so I decided that is what I would be called, she gave me life. Then the Winchesters got involved, and they tried to cure Castiel of his demonic half.

As you know with Leviathans, their blood is what makes them up; it’s true form, I believe she compared it to something called a Symbiote. So I bled on something and was able to escape that awful place along with everyone else. It took me a while to reform myself, but I made it.”

Crowley moved his glass of wine around in a small circular motion “This female you speak of, who is she?” Icarus tutted “Now now Crowley, I can’t tell you that, I don’t need you coming after her.” Crowley looked up from his drink, “And why not?” Naomi spoke up before Icarus could “Because he’s bonded with her! She’s Castiel’s Charge, and because he possessed Castiel at the time, he chose her as his Charge as well!” Icarus sighed, “You just don’t know when to shut up, do you?” Icarus flared his wings and walked closer to her, speaking with every step. “You. Pathetic. Little. Bitch.” When he got to her, he snapped her neck before taking in a deep breath before turning around. “To answer your previous question, my name is Icarus.” Without another word, Icarus had disappeared, leaving Crowley alone with the body of a former Angel. “Bonded? How interesting.” 

Crowley snapped his fingers, and a demon appeared in front of him “Yes your majesty?” Crowley stood up and walked over to the demon. “A demon-leviathan hybrid was here a moment ago, his name was Icarus, and he spoke about a human girl, a human girl he is bonded to. He is mixed up with the Winchesters and their Angel. Find out everything you can about her and report back to me, understand?” The demon nodded before disappearing. 

Crowley smirked as he returned to his throne taking another sip of his wine “Things are about to get very interesting for those walking piles of flannel. A demon-leviathan hybrid who is bonded with a human girl...who also happens to be Castiel’s little Charge... fascinating.”


	18. Bite The Bullets

The moment Castiel and I returned to the Bunker Sam, Dean, and Benny started firing questions at us left and right.

“What happened?”

“How did you get out alive?”

“Where is Naomi now?”

“Where’s Icarus?”

“What did you do to that Angel Darlin’?”

They were asking them as fast as a gun fires bullets, and I had to bite a few of them since some of the answers they weren’t going to like.

“Guys, listen, Naomi is in Hell with Icarus and Crowley.” Dean looked shocked, “Excuse me? She is where?” Castiel sighed and motioned over to the table in the Library, “You are going to need to sit down for this one I think.” We all sat down at the table, and I decided to answer the ‘what happened?’ question first. “Okay, so when I found Castiel and Naomi… I kinda… I snapped.” Dean leaned over onto the table “What do you mean you snapped?” I opened my mouth to speak, but Castiel beat me to it “She tore out her wings.”

A deafening silence filled the room, the air became so tense you could cut it with a knife. Dean looked to be in pure shock, Sam gave me a concerned look and Benny… Benny looked scared. “You...you tore out her wings? How is that even possible?” Sam finally broke the silence, and I looked down and swallowed “Well I didn’t do it, Icarus did and… they weren’t torn out per se, they were cut out.” Dean rolled his eyes “Because that makes it so much better right? Heather, you had an Angel’s wings cut out!” I jumped at Dean’s sudden change in tone. I shook my head “She deserved it.”

“Deserved it? Darlin’ what you’re tellin’ us, that amount of pain must be…” Benny trailed off, and I looked him in the eyes “What do you want me to say, Benny? That I’m sorry? That I should have had mercy on her?” He raised his hands in surrender, “Easy there, Darlin’, I’m just askin’ why she deserved it, that’s all.” I felt my wings twitch in annoyance, and I stood up and started pacing. “What she said to Cas, what she did to him, what she  _ called  _ him…” My hands balled into fists, and my wings flared out behind me as I took a deep breath to calm my anger. “She called him  _ Fallen _ , do you have any idea what kind of insult that is to an Angel? So I made her fallen, I had Icarus cut out her wings and burn them after we broke them.”

Dean pushed his chair away from the table and stood up coming over to me “You broke her wings, then cut them out and burned them? What else did you do to her Heather?” His eyes searched my face, and I looked away, unable to meet his eyes. “Well she took her grace away, and  _ I  _ turned her into a demon afterward.” All eyes fell on Icarus when he appeared in the room “She’s dead now, by the way, I snapped her neck, so there's that too.” This was news to me, and I confronted him about it “You killed her? Why?” He merely shrugged his shoulders and came over to me, putting a knuckle under my chin and tilting it up, so I was looking at him. 

“She was telling Crowley about you.” Dean scoffed “So? He knows about all of us, he’s the king of Hell.” Icarus rolled his eyes and turned to face Dean “She was telling him what she was, smartass.” Dean got up in Icarus’ face “Oh wow, she’s a human big deal.” Icarus grabbed his shirt and glared Dean down “She was telling him that she was Castiel’s Charge, you idiot. She told him that we’re bonded, so I broke her neck, which I’m quite tempted to do to you, for the second time today.” Icarus shoved Dean backward and looked at Castiel “You should be thanking her Castiel, not telling everyone in the room what she did for you.”

Castiel stood from his chair and walked over to Icarus, tilting his head in an accusatory way. “You think I haven’t thanked her? I have thanked her, so don’t you start assuming that I haven’t, or do I have to remind you of your place,  _ abomination. _ ” I took a step away from both of them as Icarus smirked at Castiel and crossed his arms. “Well, will you look at that? He gets cured, and I leave his vessel, and he suddenly thinks he’s holy, don’t you  _ Castiel _ ?” Castiel glared at Icarus, clearly pissed off  as he got right in his face, “I will bury you.” A growl left Icarus’ throat while his eyes turned that abyssal black “Will you, Angel, how? I know all your little weak spots and how to render you powerless. Or have you forgotten so easily that I possessed you? That I corrupted you? Or that I helped to  _ save _ you twice now?”

The room became tense as both Angel and demonic leviathan stood toe to toe against each other. I stepped up to try to defuse the situation “Cas.” I reached out and gently grabbed his trench coat trying to tug him away “Cas listen, I hate to tell you, but Icarus is half Leviathan, the only thing I know of that can kill, and Angel barehanded are Leviathans.” Icarus winked at Castiel “She’s smart isn’t she Castiel? Maybe that’s why you, sorry,  _ we _ like her so much?” Castiel gently pushed me behind him “You will  _ not _ touch her.” Icarus laughed, “I already have back in Purgatory, and she liked it from what I remember, called out my name several times actually. You remember that, right?” 

Any restraint that Castiel was showing toward Icarus snapped in a second. One moment Icarus was in front of Castiel, the next he was across the room pieces of the wall crumbled and fallen around him. “Cas!” He didn’t answer me; instead, he went over and picked up Icarus and vanished. 

“Well, that was exciting.” I spun to look at Dean “Are you kidding me?” Dean shrugged “Hey, this isn’t our fight here, kid, it’s yours. The only question is, who are you going to listen to? The angel on your shoulder or the devil in your ear?” I pinched the bridge of my nose, “Dean, did you seriously just say that?” He shrugged, “Hey, the opportunity was there, and I took it okay? But seriously, you’ve got one hell of a love triangle on your hands here.” I groaned, “I know, and I hate them.” Dean laughed, “Seriously? I thought girls loved this sort of thing.” 

I rolled my eyes “Yeah they do when it’s on T.V., but when it actually happens it sucks because your heart gets pulled in two different directions and no matter what, someone gets hurt.” Dean looked confused, “You say that like you’ve been through this before.” I sighed, “That’s because I have been through this before. I’m going to go find Cas.” Dean grabbed my shoulder “Hey Heather just so you know, I think you should go for Cas, he’ll take care of you and care for you, trust me.” I looked back at Dean and nodded my head, “I know.”

I found Castiel in the Bunker’s Dungeon with Icarus restrained in the chair that was sitting in the middle of the large Devil’s Trap that was carved into the cement floor. “Cas?” He turned his head to look at me, pinning me with his piercing gaze “What are you doing?” He looked back over to Icarus, who was still unconscious and put his hands in the pockets of his trench coat. “I’m trying to decide what to do with him.” I walked up to him and drew his attention to me again. “Listen, I know you don’t like him.” Castiel nodded and grunted, “You’re right, I don’t like him.” I sighed, “I know that, but he did save you, Cas.” Castiel shook his head and turned to fully face me. He gently placed a hand on my cheek and tilted my face up to look him in the eyes, “No, he didn’t. You did.”

Castiel’s eyes slowly began to glow as he stared at me “You saved me, Heather, not him.” I gently shook my head, entranced by his glowing eyes “Cas…” He gently wrapped me in his arms and drew me into him. “He may have saved this vessel, Heather, but you saved something much more important than my life.” I watched as his wings slowly unfurled and encircled me. “You saved my Hope, my Faith, my Grace. You made me an Angel again. There are no words to describe how thankful I am to you for that.” I reached my hand out and gently ran it over the structure of his left wing. “You really like my wings don’t you, Little Flower?”

I looked away from him and removed my hand from his wing, “Sorry…” Castiel gently shook his head and lightly grasped my wrist and placed it back on his wing, but put it, so my fingers threaded through his feathers. “Do not be ashamed, I do not mind if you touch them.” I ran my fingers through his feathers, and one caught the light, and it looked to have a midnight blue shine to them. “I never noticed that before…” Castiel hummed in question which drew me from my thoughts “Your feathers… they change color in the light.” 

I heard a hum come from Castiel’s chest “I was wondering when you would notice that, do you like it?” I ran my fingers through more of them and watched as they shone in the light “Cas...they’re beautiful, your wings were beautiful before but this...do all Angel’s wings do this?” Castiel shook his head “No, most other Angel’s have solid colored wings, believe it or not, Lucifer actually has the most beautiful wings, purest white you’ll ever see, so white they seem to glow.” I tilted my head at him “You’ve seen him?” He nodded once more, “I was there when he was cast into Hell.”

I looked up at him in wonder, “What was he like, before the whole rebellion thing?” Castiel’s eyes were downcast now, he wouldn’t look at me “Cas?” He shook his head “He isn’t like that anymore, Heather, so why ask?” I shrugged, “Just curious, I heard he tried to overthrow God, is that what happened?” Castiel took a deep breath, “Not exactly, no.” There was a pause, “He refused to love Humanity more than God, and he was cast out for it.” I tilted my head, “Was he jealous?” Castiel locked eyes with me again “You could call it that, yes. Lucifer was my Father’s most trusted, he was the most beautiful of all of the Host of Heaven, he was my Father’s favorite.”

“What do you look like?” Castiel stiffened “What?” I ran my fingers through his feathers once again to calm him “You’re true form, what’s it like?” Still, he wouldn’t look at me “It’s not what it used to be, as Naomi said, there are cracks in my chassis.” I placed my hand on the side of his face “Cas, you need to stop believing that. There is nothing wrong with you, you are special.” He gently removed my hand and withdrew his wings before turning his back to me. “I would frighten you.” I sighed, “Why do you think you would frighten me, Castiel?” 

He shook his head “My true form doesn’t look like anything you’ve ever seen, I am also about the size of your Chrysler Building. That and any human who has tried to perceive my true form...their eyes burned out of their heads.” I gently grabbed his shoulder and turned him to face me “So are you afraid you will scare me, or are you afraid you will hurt me?” His ice-blue eyes locked with mine in a sympathetic stare “Both. I also fear you will not see me the same as you do now. You are drawn to this vessel, it is pleasing to your eyes. I do not wish to turn your affections away from me, you mean too much to me, Little Flower.”

I gently shook my head and gently held his hands in mine “You will not scare me, Castiel. I trust you not to hurt me or scare me on purpose.” His eyes turned down to look at our hands, “Heather I…” “Please Cas?” He sighed and nodded his head slightly “Alright, but just this once, meet me outside.” My heart sped up, I was giddy with excitement, and I drew him into a hug, “Thanks, Cas.” His strong arms wrapped around my small frame, followed by his wings. “Come join me when you are ready Little Flower” Castiel withdrew his wings and pushed me away gently before turning around and heading for the door.

I turned to look over at Icarus, who was still unconscious in the chair. I shook my head, Castiel must have thrown him back pretty hard. I sighed and turned around, heading out the door and into the hallway. When I got to the Library, Sam, Dean, and Benny looked up at me. “Well, how’d it go?” Dean asked first, but I could tell it was what everyone was thinking. “Icarus is still unconscious.” Dean snorted “He pissed Cas off pretty bad, huh?” I nodded, “Yeah, I think so.” 

I headed to the War Room, and Sam spoke up next, “Where are you going?” I turned around to answer him, “Outside, I need some air.” Dean shrugged and placed his feet on the table while leaning back in the chair, “Just be careful, okay kiddo?” I smiled at him, “Always am.” I went up the stairs, out of the Bunker’s main door and outside just to see Castiel standing beside my car.

He was looking at it with narrowed eyes as he walked around it. “Cas?” He looked up at me “Why are you looking at my car like that?” He shrugged, “I was simply curious as to why it isn’t in the Garage, I know how you are with your car, Heather, you’re like Dean.” I smiled and rolled my eyes chuckling a little as I walked up to him “The reason he is sitting out here is because Icarus drove me here.” Castiel tilted his head and squinted at me, “He?” I blushed, “Oh, I didn’t tell you I named it, um…” Castiel looked confused, “Why do humans insist on naming their vehicles? It doesn’t have a consciousness, so I don’t understand the concept of it.”

I shrugged, “Honestly, I don’t know either, I guess if you care about something enough, you name it.” Castiel nodded and took my hand, looking me in the eyes, “Are you sure you want me to do this?” He seemed afraid to, and I squeezed his hand in reassurance, “Yes, I’m sure, Castiel.” He took a deep breath and nodded before turning around and heading up the hill behind the Bunker his hand still holding mine. “Where are we going?” He looked over to me “There is a clearing through the woods just up ahead, if I am going to do this, to show you this...I need to do it away from prying eyes.”

I nodded my head and allowed him to continue leading me until we came into the clearing he had spoken about. It was a large field with trees that outlined it, and Castiel brought me to the edge. “Stay here.” He kissed my forehead and removed his trench coat and tie, handing them over to me. “What do I do with these?” He smiled at me “Hold them for me.” I looked at him strangely, “Okay?” He turned around and headed to the middle of the clearing before I heard his voice ring in my head. “Close your eyes, and remember, don’t be afraid.”

I did as I was told and closed my eyes when a blinding flash of light caused me to turn my back to the clearing. There was a high pitched ringing sound, and I felt the ground quake beneath my feet. I felt my phone buzz in my pocket as I turned around to see what had happened. What I saw made me drop Castiel’s trench coat and tie to the ground in shock.


	19. Ethereal Beauty

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Listen to this to set the mood of this chapter
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aaVAFZiWGpA

My heart skipped several beats as I stared up at something that I could only describe as ethereal. Giant black-blue wings covered something sitting on the ground, I could see the point of what looked like large horns poking from about the wings. The wings themselves as I said before were large, but they looked like they had stars dotted randomly across them like they weren’t completely solid.

“Cas?” The wings flinched and wrapped closer around the form that I couldn’t see, and I tentatively stepped closer it. My phone started buzzing non-stop, and I looked down at it to see Sam and Dean blowing it up with text messages.

 

D: Heather, where are you?

S: Hey, where are you, something is going down.

D: Heather dammit answer us. The War Room is lighting up like a damn christmas tree!

D: Hello?

S: Hey!

D: We are coming to find you, stay put!

S: Don’t turn your tracker off!

 

I forgot about the tracker they had put on my phone, but I was too entranced by the form huddled behind those giant wings to care. “Cas? Is that you? It’s okay.” The wings shifted and opened only a little so that whatever was behind them could look at me. Castiel was sitting in the fetal position knees drawn up, arms wrapped around them, hiding his head away from me. “Wow...you’re huge…” I watched as his head slowly lifted up only to realize that he had two other heads resting on either side of his main one.

The one on the right appeared to be that of a Bull, the one on the left, a Zebra. But it wasn’t those that caught my attention. It was the one in the center that did. It looked almost like a white mask with a nose, two eyes, and eyebrows. There was no mouth, though, which confused me since I knew angles could speak. Bright blue eyes stared down at me, and I felt calm, “Hey Cas…” He blinked once and lowered one of his hands down and opened his palm. 

“What do you want to pick me up or something?” He slowly nodded, and I carefully climbed into his hand. “Just don’t drop me, okay?” He blinked again before slowly and carefully lifting me up, so I was level with his bright blue eyes. There was energy humming from his form, unlike anything I had ever felt before, and I opened my wings and stretched them out when I felt them begin to tingle. I saw a pulsating light, and I looked down at his chest. There was a large crack or scar there. The light was pulsating like a heartbeat, and I looked back into his eyes as his wings tightened around himself when he noticed I was looking.

“Cas it's okay. You’re beautiful.” I heard what sounded like a hum coming from him as his eyes closed. “I told you you wouldn’t scare me, didn’t I?” He opened his eyes again, and they were expressing what I could only explain as admiration. “Can you speak? In this form, I mean?” He slowly closed his eyes again in silent acknowledgment as I felt a presence in my mind. It was intense, yet it brought me peace,  _ “Conisa Elasa Ge Hoxmarch Ol?” _ The words that came through my mind were beautiful, but I couldn’t understand any of it. “Cas, I don’t understand, I’m sorry.” I felt the presence nudge at my conscious again  _ “Do you not fear me?”  _ His eyes were wide with worry, and I quickly shook my head “No, no Castiel, I don’t fear you.”

_ “Conisa Elasa Ooaoana Oi Ta Apeta? Do you see me as before?”  _ I realized when he was in this form, his wording was much more beautiful. “Yes, and more.” The presence in my mind seemed to envelop me completely, even to my very soul.  _ “Conisa Oi T Barinu Zomdv Aziazor? Zomdv Boaluahe De Ol? Zomdv Lucifatianu? Conisa Oi T Barinu Elasa? Do I still have your love? Your worship of me? Your passion? Do I still have you?”  _ I nodded my head “Yes Castiel, yes you still have all of that. You still have me. You will always have me.” I heard another hum come from his form as he closed his eyes once again. He brought me close to his face and gently nuzzled against me, my entire body fitting in between his large blue eyes.

“Like I said in Purgatory, giant puppy.” I heard a laugh ring through my head, it was genuine and light, not dark and evil like Icarus’ could be. “Heather? Hey, you out here? What the hell is that?!” I heard Dean’s voice echo through the clearing as he emerged from the trees. “Shit.” I cursed under my breath, and Castiel drew me closer to him as he stood up to his full height. I gripped tightly onto one of his large fingers as they wrapped gently around me. “C-Cas!”  I was up too high, my heart hammering in my chest as fear gripped me. 

_ “Elasa Barinu Hoxmarch. Bagile? You have fear. Why?”  _ I closed my eyes tightly and turned to look into his eyes. “It’s too high Cas. I have a fear of heights.” The look in his eyes was one of sorrow and pain.  _ “Rit Ol. Forgive me.”  _ I shook my head “It’s okay, you didn’t know. Just don’t drop me, please?” He brought me to his chest, and I felt this overwhelming sense of peace and warmth coming from where the pulsating light was.  _ “Elasa Bolape Sapah Erm Ol. You are safe with me.”  _ My phone started ringing, and I answered it, “Hello?”

“Heather, what the hell?!” It was Dean, and he sounded angry and afraid at the same time. I swallowed and cleared my throat “It’s okay, Dean, I’m fine.” I heard the cock of a gun, and I panicked, “Dean, stop! Don’t shoot him!” The line fell silent for a moment “Him? What the hell do you mean  _ him _ ?” I looked up at Castiel who was looking down at me with concern. “It’s Cas Dean!” The phone went silent again, “Dean?” I heard the sound of a gun being fired and I watched as Castiel frowned, his wings flaring out, blocking out the sun. 

“Cas, it’s okay, just put me down.” He looked back over to me “They don’t know it’s you Cas, Sam, and Dean, they don’t know.” Castiel blinked as he slowly crouched back down, lowering his hand to the ground and allowing me to hop off. “Dean, stop!” I ran over to him and flared my wings out. “Stop!” Dean looked shocked and angry “What the hell is that, did it hurt you?” I shook my head “He isn’t an "it" Dean, it’s Castiel. What you’re looking at is his true form, so please stop!”

Dean lowered his gun just as Sam came bursting through the trees guns blazing, “Sam, don’t shoot!” He dropped the gun when he saw Castiel, his face turning pale “What is...what is that?” Dean stepped in front of Sam and grabbed his shoulders “It’s Cas, his true form, that’s what Heather said anyway.” Sam looked with wide eyes “What about his vessel?” I looked up to Castiel, and he lowered himself down onto his hands and knees so he could get closer. “Hey, Cas…” Dean’s voice was small as Castiel looked over at him and blinked.

“Cas, where is your vessel?” Sam spoke up next, and Castiel sat upon his knees before pointing to where the pulsating light was coming from his chest. “Huh...that’s...I don’t know what to say honestly.” I chuckled at Dean’s answer and watched as Cas came back down again. “Are our eyes going to burn out now?” Dean’s question was a valid one, and Castiel looked back over to me.  _ “Ag. No.”  _ I shook my head, “He said no.” Dean looked at me quizzically “He’s talking to you? How?” I looked over to ask Castiel the silent question of whether it was okay to tell them and he simply blinked.

“Yes, he is talking to me. Telepathically, but it's strange, he speaks in this strange yet beautiful language that I don’t understand first then he says it in English.” Sam shook his head “He must be speaking in Enochian to you then. I looked at Sam, confused, “I’m sorry?” Sam looked between myself and Castiel “Enochian, it’s the language of the Angel’s.” 

I looked up to Castiel with wide eyes “Is that what that language is? Is that what you actually speak?” Castiel nodded,  _ “Par Camliax A Vaoan. Oi Bolape Bagile Oi Gohe. He speaks the truth. This is what we speak.”  _ I felt my eyes brim with tears, “It's beautiful, Castiel, you’re beautiful.” Another hum came from him which startled Sam and Dean. Castiel sat up again while turning his attention to the two brothers  _ “Gohe Par Adagita Niis Salamann. Tell them to go home.”  _

I turned to Sam and Dean, “He says to go back to the Bunker.” They looked at me funny, “Heather, are you sure?” Sam was the first one to express his concern as he shot a wary glance over to Castiel. “Yeah, I mean what if he steps on you?” I snorted at Dean’s comment.  _ “Gohe Par Adagita Gono Ol. Elasa Bolape Sapah Erm Ol. Tell them to trust me. You are safe with me.” _ I placed my hand on Dean's shoulder and shook my head laughing a little. “He says for you to trust him, that I am safe with him.” 

_ “Oi Gemeganza Ge Insi A Elasa.  I will not step on you.”  _ I could tell by the tone in Castiel’s voice that he was rolling his eyes, and I laughed. “He said he won’t step on me. Now go back to the Bunker.” The brother’s laughed before turning around and heading back into the woods. When I turned my attention back to Castiel, he made a motion with his finger to turn my back to him. “Are you going to return to your vessel now?” He blinked slowly,  _ “Oi Bolape. I am.” _

I did as he said and turned around, closing my eyes. There was another bright flash followed by a high pitched ringing sound. “You can turn around now.” I spun around when I heard Castiel speak. His eyes were still glowing, and I walked up to him handing him his trench coat and tie. He pushed the trench coat back at me “Lay it on the ground behind you.” I turned around and laid it out on the ground and turned back around to face him. When I did Castiel wrapped an arm around me and drew me into his chest before closing his eyes and kissing me. 


End file.
